Jack Monroe #154 The book has furloughed itself

[Fruitjack]

And doesn’t she have a container full of msg? I’m sure I remember seeing her post about it last year. Awful stuff; if you need that to add flavour to your cooking, you’re doing something wrong.

Need to pick up on this. If you are allergic to MSG obviously it is bad for you to eat it, like peanuts and gluten. Otherwise, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it and it is highly demonised in Western culture. There’s lots of interesting articles about why that is but this one is helpful, though it’s American.

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1115386

 

[bladiesla]

I love putting a dash of MSG in my fried rice

 

[Ellabella]

Delirious with pain with a rash? Christ, she must be exhausting to be friends with, every other week it's some ailment with the worst pain known to man. She must have the lowest pain threshold ever.

 

[Tabitha D]

So she had some sort of “meeting” scheduled for today in London. I did wonder whether this might be with her long-suffering publisher. If so, then she’d definitely want to swerve that, given that the book is almost certainly not finished, and what she has completed will be a load of shoddy crap. She won’t want to be asked to explain all that to her publisher face to face.

So this latest ailment is convenient timing, to say the least.

 

[Powershower]

From a Facebook group I’m in about feeding yourself on a budget. Truth be told I joined the group in all seriousness to look for tips but there’s a lot of bollock sausages and stuff like this ... people fawning over Peach and chickpea slurry.

I like how “quite a celebrity” sounds like an insult. Said with a little straightening of a blouse and that tiny cough middle class middle aged women do when they decide something is out of their comfort zone.

 

[Unfluencer]

This is simultaneously unsurprising and astonishing.

The dog ate her password AND her face?!

 

[Begborrowsteal]

I still call it going into central, thats basically anywhere between marble arch and waterloo. After waterloo its just south. Never say going into/up town. I actually live in a little town now and it still feels weird to say in going into town.

Anyway. Her skin does look sore. But no sympathy cos she most likely did it to herself.

 

[EddieBeds]

If she claims shingles then she must be reading the F&D thread to boot the absolute ghoul, her rash doesn’t look like it at all, but she’ll be able to claim up to 4 weeks of illness if she misses the treatment window (like I did, because I’m BUSY neglecting myself with a baby not BUSY spray painting death trap tins).

She really doesn’t wanna do this book does she? Surely if you’re pulling sixth form level stunts to get out of your forth hand in you’d just admit book writing isn’t for you / let’s just call it a day?

I was thinking this as soon as I read the recap/saw the pic that she’d been lurking on the F&D thread!

Also is today the day she has a potential interview/telly thing - think she dropped a hint she had an interview/meeting/telly thing? Sorry got a vague memory something was mentioned around the ‘filler Pringles’ hack for inflating your lips but can’t fully remember.

ETA: Sorry didn’t complete my mini grunk before posting @Tabitha D

 

[Vanelope]

I went to bed and now she has the plague - WTAF

 

[SarcasticEllis]

Wondering if either someone was drafted in to sort the tech issue last night, or she was told firmly just to bring her stuff today and they’d sort it for her ‘in town’, and she panicked because they’d see it wasn’t done.
Pick a spot, smear deep heat and all sorts in to it, tweet some tit about delerium and glands, bingo! Looks like it’s too risky to get out and about today...

 

[Orphan_Black]

Wondering if either someone was drafted in to sort the tech issue last night, or she was told firmly just to bring her stuff today and they’d sort it for her ‘in town’, and she panicked because they’d see it wasn’t done.
Pick a spot, smear deep heat and all sorts in to it, tweet some tit about delerium and glands, bingo! Looks like it’s too risky to get out and about today...

I hope it's the final showdown from her publishers. No book today? GTFO Jack!

 

[I steal names]

I think she forgot to set her alarm for 3am, there's been no more wailing or gnashing of (ouchy) teeth since last night.

 

[Vanelope]

Her publisher must be running out her contract, she probably hasn’t made any money for them for years and she is so much trouble.

 

[Harrybosch]

News just in: Woman with skin rash fails to meet deadline.

 

[Legionnairess]

Maybe the rash is an allergic reaction to the evil eye necklace? It would be poetic

As my old Gran would say, who is now DEAD. “She’s allergic to a hard days bloody work”

Also she needs that 4th bedroom for all her bloody pharmaceuticals..,

 

[Vanelope]

Phone call from Jack to publisher
‘Cough cough I can’t come up taaaaahn today’
‘Oh? Why not? We have the meeting for the thing and you can hand in your script and we can get started on edits’
‘Cough cough I have a terrible rash/temperature/immune compromised issue’
‘Ah I see’ *hand over phone* did we pay her anything up front this time?’
*from distant office* ‘OF COURSE NOT’
*snorts* ‘ok then Jack, feel better soon yeah’
Jack at home ‘totally got away with that’
Publisher blocks number

 

[bladiesla]

I hope it's the final showdown from her publishers. No book today? GTFO Jack!

If her publisher lets her go we'll never hear the end of how they discriminated against her because of her ilnesses etc.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Tbf who amongst us can say we’d go into central if the Groucho was shut? We really can’t expect her to mingle with the disgusting peasants of public transport, do an hour of disproportionately compensating work, get dropped by her publisher, be hounded by the paparazzi, get called white trash, kick a train door, all the while depriving her of enjoying two portions of squid ink pasta?

It’s what Viv Thatcher would have wanted xx

 

[Unfluencer]

If her publisher lets her go we'll never hear the end of how they discriminated against her because of her ilnesses etc.

The more I read about her, the more I think this is her actual aim.

 

[bladiesla]

Had we seen the pond water stock reaction already?