Jack Monroe #148 Ya prune

[DinosaurSenior]

Seriously though what are we guilty of?
Having an opinion or being a critical thinker last time i checked that was still allowed?
I'm a bit freaked out by the threats issued to tattlers?
Why is that considered ok or justified by her and other media influencers?
Its all a bit eric (convicted sex offender) joyce again?
Getting info on people, tracing IP address (this lie that influencers spread explained here) ,
issuing veiled threats?
Which probably they won't carry out but its the obsessiveness of it that is disturbing?
These are frankly unhinged deluded people who live in a state of being perpetually offended?
Their rage is exhausting and easily triggered imo people on this forum have valid points to make.
Most of the posts i read are intelligent and well thought out and actually a lot of us just got sick (one way or another) of being lied to or have people try to hoodwink us? some posts are also written from a sense of empathy by people having been exposed to predators and seeing and feeling the damage that does?
Lots of us have chronic pain and sickness and disability (you know genuine diagnosed ones not just chronic hypochondria) or are full time carer's or nurse's or teachers and teaching assistants who work with kids with special needs (a lifesaver for me the help my son gets is giving him a chance at a life not just survival).
Mothers and fathers and someone's son or daughter or civil servants or writers or chefs accountants or artists or unemployed or students (and basically everyone and everything too many different occupations or vocations to list?)

An open community that anyone can join and be a part of as long as they are civil.
There is laughter and heartfelt messages of support there is access to information and threads open for advice and solace and protection and help and also for fun (sorry i'm making tattle life sound a little too worthy but it is worthwhile and helpful?)
All that should be shut down then or people confronted (presumed guilty) of what?

What is she hoping to find behind the door for goodness sake?
If she picked me for example she would find a grumpy mother of four crammed into a council flat that at the moment is nearly always chaotic and messy.
I'm struggling to get my balance to be honest i'm a bit all over the place, happy sad weepy calm confused frustrated?
My health is a mess i've put on weight i'm easily stressed and anxious i'm hibernating (lockdown feels like the longest winter ever and yet i'm scared to come out of it).
If i saw her (in theory ha) i'd probably just slam the door or tell her to duck off .
I'm in a self isolating cocoon and hate being disturbed my nerves are a bit frayed?
Would it really make her feel better to see that or would it be confirmation bias?
Angry anti social trolls that tra la la are not happy to see me?
What does she expect if she has already made up her mind?
Move along monroe nothing to see here?
Isn't she a bit of a curtain twitcher the stereotypical neighbourhood watch lady convinced that every ill in society was out there roaming the streets the hooligans the thugs the trolls?
You know i hate the term trolls it is abusive its convenient (its shorthand for lazy people) that like to stigmatise others?
We are real people (that should not need to be said).
We are not just masses of data or a username.
We live we love we have commitments and jobs and hobbies and we laugh and write our stories and compare notes and help each other and look into things that raise a red flag?

Looking at jack i'm reminded of the phrase

Beware of all those in whom the urge to punish is strong...

Yes Jack why is that ?
What gives you the right to think that you could just turn up unannounced on someone's doorstep and demand answers?
Who the actual duck are you to think you are owed either a livelihood or an explanation?

Edit to add *i added a silly gif because i needed to lighten up a bit

This is so perfect. You've articulated everything so beautifully, and have said in words, things that I felt but would just have written as an angry grunt xx

 

[Mr Krabs]

It would have been so easy to miss the Thunderclap posts unless you read every single page. She makes so much bizarre content that you simply can't skip ahead when you Grunka. Last time I thought a thread was getting a bit dull, I skipped five pages and people were talking about her being kidnapped as a child and I was like "whatty what what now????" So obviously I had to then go through the thread much more carefully.

 

[Hollaaa]

Am still not over the fish.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Reminded of rinsed hoops by vibing to Pet Slop Bots were you, Jack? Perhaps next you would like to address your viscous soup-based assassination attempt of dear heart @MancBee.

@Billybellend it's not jus de cheval, it's Bécheval. I've been waiting for an opportunity to announce Jack's sideline in sauces for some time. We've been quietly and gently working on it together behind the scenes although she never acknowledges me on Twitter no matter how many times I reply to her tweets with white hearts.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

I love the rhyming of "sauce" and "horse'!!!

 

[bowiethesdmn]

That's got to be the best pun I've heard in a while

 

[Sideboard Bob]

Looks legit, it’s made by a doctor and everything!

 

[Blurp]

Has anyone noticed the music in the nearly 28K viggle's story?

 

[colouredlines]

I'm glad she now writes a crappy little attempt at a topical blurb on her old recipe tweets. Remember the Hootsuite era, when she just tweeted old recipe links without any commentary 4 times a day and we posted here about what a tit social media strategy that was?

She's learning from us...she even heats her oil before frying onion in her latest slop!

You'rewelcome Jack! Now Lesson 3: Don't Be A Total bleep All The bleeping Time.

 

[Duckypoo]

I was skeptical when mine recommended silk socks, but honestly made a big difference. They help regulate my feet's temp, so they never become too hot or cold. I absolutely hate wearing them some days, I'm a bare foot hippy at heart, but it's worth it. I think any one who actually has arthritis, regardless of which type, would be first to tell you how we don't do anything that can risk a flare up, because we actually know how bloody painful that is!!! (and popping pain pills isn't a long term solution!)


Some have animal by products in them or the company themselves are involved with animal by products.

Going to have to try that, thanks for the tip!

Although you know if Mackie wore silk socks she'd be slipping over and relying on her Mediterranean arse to save her...

 

[Emmapism]

I tell you what the TikTok and Insta kids could unmask her. Just put some of the worst stuff in an easily digestible video.

'Exposing serial fantasist and poverty cosplay queen, Jack Monroe'

Sweet dreams kids

 

[Pixieboots]

I do sometime wonder if she's testing the squiggles. Some have an outbreak of glee at everything and anything.

Softly fold some decanted fish oil into the contents of the cat litter tray. Toss in some rinsed toenails and serve on a bed of prune disappointment.
"Ooooo, that sounds amazeballs! Will deffo try that next time I empty the litter tray."

Prune Disappointment, a new paint shade from Farrow & Ball.

 

[Duckypoo]

I missed it this evening, was washing my hands

Really though, been having a zoom chat with some friends, one of them said something funny and I caught myself ALMOST saying “what?! have you been smoking Parma Violets?!!”. I think this means you’re an influencer now @Duckypoo , it’s one of those amazingly bonkers stories I can’t stop thinking about!

I'm waiting for that sweet, sweet Parma Violet cheque to come through, any day now

 

[Cookiecookie]

I read this recipe and she says to use honey or a vegan alternative. What's a vegan alternative to honey? Molasses?

ETA I forgot about google apparently molasses or syrup (maple, apple etc) can be substituted for honey

I found this in a library book. It's called 'Vegan Junk Food' by Zachary Bird. Not sure if it's available outside of yet though as it's pretty recent

 

[HotesTilaire]

I’m on it, Hotes. I’ll not be around at exactly 8 to not clap in your stead. Take care.

Thanks lads, especially boyo. I really wanted to deliberately not do it myself by remembering at 8pm but fell asleep due to my ouchie head.
27k viggle is pissed! Was the song common people? The Onion song?

 

[ChickenPorridge]

I tell you what the TikTok and Insta kids could unmask her. Just put some of the worst stuff in an easily digestible video.

'Exposing serial fantasist and poverty cosplay queen, Jack Monroe'

Sweet dreams kids

Yes, absofuckinglutely x

 

[kachoochoo]

completely apropos of nothing, but earlier today, I had cause to type the sentence "a 26 track fearless!!!" in the taylor swift thread. not only did I worry I'd posted it in this thread by mistake, but also had to physically stop myself from adding "on a bird!"

"a 26 track fearless?? on a bird???

 

[FrumpyCat]

She did the same thing with the granny knicker sideboard shots

Instagram, left v Twitter, right, with slimming tool and smoothing tool applied:

View attachment 431402

Sorry everyone

that photo makes me feel sorry for her. She is trying so hard to look sexy, but
Just looks sad, awkward, and desperate.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Orphan_Black]

Going to have to try that, thanks for the tip!

Although you know if Mackie wore silk socks she'd be slipping over and relying on her Mediterranean arse to save her...

Silk is too expensive for someone so desitute! Not going to lie they are a tad pricey for socks, but really noticed a difference on cold days like we've had recently. If my feet get too cold it's like the worse pins and needles ever and makes me want to chop my feet off. (I have osteo so the bone spurs are pinching nerves)