Jack Monroe #117 Exit through the grift slop

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Went down the Greenbelt rabbit hole...quite frightening.

EDIT: Apologies if this has been put up before, I just can’t believe it. Also, why not dress a bit smarter for the occasion? Although with the timeline I wonder if alcohol was a factor, no judgement, just a shame.

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Omg!! I’ve never seen this! That ‘sauce’!!!!! 😮😮😮😮😱😱😱😱😱😱
Nor have I, only screenshots. My god it's excruciating, Matt desperately trying to come up with things to fill the void as Jack's obviously supposed to be explaining her dish and just isn't. But making some weird spluttery noise in her mic when he said he wasn't familiar with aduki beans (I reckon he is, it was just another thing to say).
 
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Went down the Greenbelt rabbit hole...quite frightening.

EDIT: Apologies if this has been put up before, I just can’t believe it. Also, why not dress a bit smarter for the occasion? Although with the timeline I wonder if alcohol was a factor, no judgement, just a shame.

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Oh no, the poor pet. That is not a good photo. I'd be raging if someone used that one of me for something so public.
But it does show viewers what her actual face looks like, she's quite mooned faced not the sharp check boned face we see now.
 
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I apologize to sir Matt of the forearms. He didn’t say “that’s enough” he said “good to know” although I feel “that’s enough” was implied 🤣
She really needs to give the facetune a rest. If you keep seeing her normal face it seems normal. It only looks all odd when you’ve seen it face tuned into somebody else.
 
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on what planet is this an appetising bowl of food

if you're making a spicy asian style broth surely the joy is in all the fresh and flavourful toppings like spring onions or chillies or kimchi or coriander or sesame seeds or ANYTHING other than floating chunks of raw onion
I know I’m going all ‘Tank Jack’, I already droned on about my excellent roast dinner yesterday, and today made noodle soup with the chicken carcass. After putting on a stock in the morning and leaving for about 3 hrs, I scooped out the bones, celery, onion etc, and then added in ribbons of carrot, shredded greens, dashes of soy/oyster/fish/rice vinegar, then the egg noodles. Then the shredded left over chicken. To serve, chopped lengthways spring onion, Thai basil, and a few splodges of smoked chilli paste (the stuff that’s like a thick oil). End result was not only delicious, but had Orange, yellow, green, paler green, white, and dots of red. It was absolutely delicious, and also looked very vibrant and healthy. My kids loved it, we loved it, and was a nice contrast to the rich Christmas food we’ve been hoofing like gremlins since about October. She can’t bleeping cook! She doesn’t deserve a job in food. She did at the beginning, because everyone can learn and grow, but she’s so blind to reality that she doesn’t realise her food is tit. She has the bare minimum of cooking skills. The fact that she’s at home all day but would rather buy cheap bread rather than make it, despite having her own books full of bread recipes, just shows how crap she is at cooking. I can make bread, I mostly buy it, but if I had nothing to do all day but cook, and the alternative was the cheapest loaf available to give my kids for lunch - I’d make it.
 
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Went down the Greenbelt rabbit hole...quite frightening.

EDIT: Apologies if this has been put up before, I just can’t believe it. Also, why not dress a bit smarter for the occasion? Although with the timeline I wonder if alcohol was a factor, no judgement, just a shame.

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I had no idea that Jack was remotely religious, let alone full on evangelical. I mean, I’ve never heard her talk about her faith or going to church in all the years I’ve followed her online. I’m flabbergasted... and slightly suspicious tbh.
 
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I had no idea that Jack was remotely religious, let alone full on evangelical. I mean, I’ve never heard her talk about her faith or going to church in all the years I’ve followed her online. I’m flabbergasted... and slightly suspicious tbh.
Don’t you remember, on her infinite bubble list that made no sense, she was allowed out of lockdown for church and “private prayer” 🤷‍♀️
 
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I had no idea that Jack was remotely religious, let alone full on evangelical. I mean, I’ve never heard her talk about her faith or going to church in all the years I’ve followed her online. I’m flabbergasted... and slightly suspicious tbh.
She keeps her religious background on the down low because there's nothing that the woke hate more than churchgoers. It doesn't fit in with her edgy social justice persona. Also, not many working class white people go to church in England (it may be different for Northern Irish and Greek people but she probably feels it doesn't fit in with her act).

Most of all, exposing herself as a regular churchgoer would have people asking why didn't she get help from them during The Poverty, as churches tend to have strong social support networks.
 
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Don’t you remember, on her infinite bubble list that made no sense, she was allowed out of lockdown for church and “private prayer” 🤷‍♀️
Amazed and relieved she didn't put helping herself to collection plate down.
 
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Oh wow, “now that you’ve stopped talking”.
WHAT. It’s like a wee school girl who has just overstepped the familiarity line with their favourite teacher.
That white sauce is awful, a true crime and I would have LOVED to have known the producers reactions to it.
It brought back “Thanks Phil” from the Inbetweeners when Will talks to Mr Gilbert and is over familiar. Her lack of self awareness is laughable. And to think following this we got the reverse rats tail sideboard chewing a child’s teething necklace photoshoot.

Any idea what the big surprise is?!
 
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I was thinking, before we get to a new thread, if it might be a good idea to have all of The Sloppies nominations in a Jack for Dummies style bit on each new thread (or the wiki) because it really does sum up the level of chaos she creates??

And if someone was really bored, they could hyperlink the noms with the evidence for easy access?
 
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