Jack Monroe #114 i, slopbot

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Veronicaaa

nightfeedz said:
I can’t imagine how I would get my loved ones to do this for me without telling them what it was for!!
Click to expand...
Jack: Hi everyone, can you fill out two sheets of A4 paper, outlining your feelings about ME, please?
Everyone: <sighs> Not *again*, Jack.
 
Reactions: 65

Fitnessqueen

Ellabella said:
The house with the dark blue walls is definitely not her bungalow.
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Agreed. The Christmas tree shot definitely is though.

Just read the retweeted Potatoes again (why? why? As if this year hasn’t been shitty enough already) and see that the tip jar is still primed and ready to receive at the bottom of it....
 
Reactions: 35

Clarends

Veronicaaa said:
We had Flora marg. We weren't too poor we couldn't afford butter, I think my mum thought it was better for you at the time? I'll ask her later how she could deprive me so!
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I've always had some sort of marge and butter just for special occasions. I thought everybody did. And now so many people are plant based I dont really bother with it.
 
Reactions: 18

ScamSandwich

Of course I could be horribly wrong with my interpretation but by the looks of it our hero's emphasis was not on giving out advice to others but to prove SHE got a diagnosis.
 
Reactions: 29

Raker

Just hopping off the GL express - it’s taken 1 week since she snnouished go viral, and I’ve been BUSY. But Lordy Fraus, I’ve had to do 5 (FIVE) threads in 1 week. Who else can generate this much content?

I don’t know what this is going to pitch up in the middle of, but I just really need to say some of the things that have been bubbling with every page turn, in no particular order.

1. Hugest of hugs to @Blurp and any other cabal members who are struggling and/or triggered by this fucking waste of 2 good kidneys.
2. Slopbot - can we get T-shirts with this little fella on? I’d be happy to pay/donate to a cause associated, it is truly a Work Of Genius ...
3..... speaking of Works of Genius, the Sloppies are amazing. How I hooted. And as others have said, what a lot to fit into 9 months.
4. As so many of you have repeatedly pointed out before neurodiversity =\= cuntishness; acting like a cunt = cuntishness .
5. Laura Waddell and the aftermath. Arise the new army of squiggle refuseniks. Jackie will be going viral for all the wrong reasons
6. Marcus Rashford is

One week, Fraus, that’s all just in One. Week.

right, back in or I’ll never catch up...
 
Reactions: 68
L

live laugh loathe

Well I didnt think it possible to hate Jack more but upon watching the Muppets Christmas Carol for the first time this year it turns out she’s ruined it for me as I can no longer watch Michael Caine without hearing ‘traaazers...on a bird’

Thanks Jack, sons crying
 
Reactions: 62

Cookiecookie

We just always had marge. I'm an 80s kid, and it was thought to be healthier in those days. Butter's a pain in the arse, it's rock solid in the fridge, and no chance where I am of leaving it out.
 
Reactions: 33
F

FrumpyCat

Has anyone been able to work out which two years Jack was vegan for?

I remember an article when she announced she had been vegan for, oh several days i think. And how much money she had saved and how cheap it was.

Then there was the article about how being a vegan was a luxury for posh folks. But I can't work out the time line.
 
Reactions: 36

ScamSandwich

Catch up with you later, Frauen, I am off for my £5 shop!*




*spends £5 every minute for several hours in various shops.
 
Reactions: 35

Lanie

Veronicaaa said:
Jack: Hi everyone, can you fill out two sheets of A4 paper, outlining your feelings about ME, please?
Everyone: <sighs> Not *again*, Jack.
Click to expand...

Front and back and I want at least 18 pages and it all had to be about ME!!
 
Reactions: 23

Tittykitty

We used to have this, my mum told us from an early age that we didn’t like butter, Mayo or even thick gravy, her gravy was just water with gravy salts in it, her mince was also cooked in water with gravy salts, onion and carrot. We ate lots of tinned food as children so apart from tomatoes I tried to avoid tinned stuff now, there was nothing worse than tinned mixed veg.
 
Reactions: 31

LittleMissMuffet

Cabal - I ventured into another thread today and I’m honestly just so relieved to be back here. It’s scary out there. Can absolutely see why people think Tattle is a horrible place.

Please send pictures of doggos, cattos or you can post me letters telling me I’m amazing.
 
Reactions: 69

Winthropp Tuesday

Frauen, please raise your glasses for I bring to you seasonal griftings of great joy...

I Wish It Could Be Griftmas Every Day


Are you ready frauen? (Yeah)
When the Tattlers bring receipts
To highlight Jack's deceit
They put a great big smile upon the frauen's face

When you jump into a thread
You must grunka through instead
Don't miss DKL or Kittengate,
And THAT MAN on a plate it's on the way...

Oh well I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
When the tip jar rattles and patreons start to pay
Oh I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
Let the slop ring out for Griftmas

When she's dishing out the snark
Because the shitty bungalow is cold and dark
Then Pinnochio's nose is gonna light her merry way

Now her dirty paws appear
On a bowl of pig's bollocks and ears
So she streaks by the fire
Till her Bubble Buddy runs away

Oh well I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
When the tip jar rattles and patreons start to pay
Oh I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
Let the slop ring out for Griftmas

When the Tattlers bring receipts (When the Tattlers bring receipts)
To highlight Jack's deceit (to highlight Jack's deceit)
They put a great big smile upon the frauen's face

So when Jackie blends her slop (Jackie blends her slop)
Bring a bucket and damp cloth (better bring a bucket and damp cloth)
For her anchioade and mussel pear surprise
Is on the way...

Oh well I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
When the tip jar rattles and patreons start to pay
Oh I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
Let the slop ring out for Griftmas

Oh well I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
When the tip jar rattles and patreons start to pay
Oh I wish it could be Griftmas everyday
Let the slop ring out for Griftmas

Why don't you give up...your lieeesss fo-or-or-or-or Griftmassssss...?

I THANK YOU.
 
Reactions: 93
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