Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #186 It has always been a dump smell!

[Bridgeofsighs]

TAM: He just did a Will Smith movie. Sure he's broke! She is a full time single mother, under constant legal attack. how exactly would you like her to 'jumpstart' her life?

Get off twitter and get a job.

IG: My marriage to Alice has irrevocably failed. This dissolution proceeding has been pending for over two years and I am certain that a reconciliation not possible. I seek to terminate our marital relationship as soon as possible because remaining married to Alice is causing me a considerable amount of stress. I was forced to file a Request for Domestic Violence Restraining Order against Alice due to her abusive conduct. A Temporary Domestic Violence Restraining Order was issued on February 15, 2022 and on August 2, 2022, a three-year Restraining Order After Hearing was entered. Alice's abuse has continued despite the restraining order.

We know.

 

[raiseseyebrow]

I cba to scroll all the way back to find the post to quote, but this is really bothering me.
Kitti made a post with an analogy about a teacher giving a student feedback, and then suddenly changing that feedback and how it’d make them feel off kilter.

This is such a fucking weird analogy to use in the context of a romantic relationship breakdown. The teacher-student relationship involves a clear and distinct power imbalance where one person (the teacher) is always in charge/taking the lead and the other person is subordinate and requires guidance. One person always has the ultimate power and the final say.

A romantic relationship should never involve a power imbalance like this, and should instead be built on foundations of mutual trust and cooperation, and should involve compromise where necessary.

If you aren’t Alice then please get some therapy to unpick your internalised idea of how a romantic relationship should be.
If you are Alice then…honestly? This view of relationships explains a loooooooot.

 

[lurkette]

Peter Hitchens often writes about no-fault divorce. I wondered if anyone here feels that yes, marriage is a contract and why should the one who wants to breaks that not have some consequence. I believe if you sign a contract with the Navy for 7 years you have to pay to exit it early. Same with many mortgages, loans, and many contracts.
I'm not in love with AE, I just can't see why she is being blamed when for, idk, being married for 21 years? Being upset and going off the rails when this falls apart and she says he lied to her for long?
If your teachers told you you were an amazing student, marked your work as straight A's, told you you were kind and loving and whatever, and then suddenly one day they gave you all grade D's and point blank refused to tell you why, how would you feel?
On top of that, if they then started telling others, maybe a new 'A grade student' that you were actually a crappy student all along, and that despite claiming to enjoy having you in class they actually hated it and were suffering, how would you feel?

Yes, marriage is a contract, but people are human beings. Being married to another person does not give you ‘ownership’ of that person, and Ioan has paid dire consequences for ending his.

Divorce is never easy- it’s cost him well over 1 million dollars at this point, embarrassed him in the press, caused unequivocal shit between him and his daughters. I don’t think Ioan took the decision to leave lightly.

Please take some time to read all the court docs, I think they’ll be an eye opener for you.

 

[Hoopla]

"Alice's abuse has continued despite the restraining order."

This gives me hope that they already have proof she's behind the socks, and they're just letting her dig herself into an even bigger hole until the bifurcation is over.

 

[welp]

I think it seems a possibility because of how he acted, which both IG and AE seem to agree on for the most part. In terms of the continuing to send gushing loving texts, calls and so on, he says that he was 'keeping her sweet' to avoid confrontation and angst, whilst she says that is the reason she was completely shocked when he suddenly came back from a trip and was cold. Do you think he had already started to flirt or more with BW? To see that he may want to have a relationship with BW, hence a need to discard AE? Or do you think he was just fed up in the relationship with AE long before meeting BW? I'd really want to know if I was AE, not least because if he'd have told her that he was unhappy they could have TRIED to address issues in the marriage.
Wouldn't you like to know if you were the wife?
But, oh, like many men, that doesn't seem a great prospect to sit in therapists offices IF all the while they already have another woman on their minds.

Well, she keeps saying he was sending love notes until the day he told her he no longer loved her (and posted "proof" of it). However, the context was frightening. She physically attacked him (allegedly, I will add in the interest of fairness) one day in July and then went on a rant on twitter about him (I witnessed this). Then he sends her lovely messages....I get that somebody that is abusive doesnt get it (but it shouldnt excuse them), but it's blatantly obvious that he was trying to keep her happy. As almost any victim in a abusive relationship does (and almost every victim in a abusive relationship takes "long" to leave, it has tis reasons, you are scared, especially with kids in the mix). Saying then that they were lying and thus deserve the reaction of the other party is victim blaming at its finest.

 

[Hiraeth]

With two very publicly neglected and vaulnerable girls in the house I hate to think who Alice would attract if she's "dating" someone.

Considering that she lets a delusional furry she only knows from online write creepy articles with photos of her underage daughter, I don't even want to think of the type of person she would actually bring home.

 

[Tabitha D]

I am all in for Elise Greenberg being the girls' GAL.

This is such a good thing for everyone involved.

MOO.

I get the impression that Alice thinks the children’s lawyer will be taking instructions from her, and that she’ll be involved in their meetings etc. If so, I think she’s in for a rude awakening.

 

[WatermelonSugar22]

Is the truth important to you? AE should never ever lie to her children, or try to manipulate them. Nor should a husband lie to wife. If IG refused to communicate with AE about what actually happened and why then the feelings don't really change after 3 years, why wouldn't she still want to know? Tom Cruise (again, sorry, he just comes to mind) refused to tell his wife Nicole why he wanted a divorce. Nice. I guess it keeps quite a lot of control.

Why are you avoiding discussing how Alice treated her children as weapons? Alice HAS lied to and manipulated her children, and that’s still happening now. That’s a huge thing that you’re ignoring.

You are so focused on her wanting to know if he cheated, has it ever occurred to you that he didn’t cheat and has told her so (which he has done, he has submitted it in court docs) and she just can’t accept it because it would mean there are other reasons for the divorce, reasons that involve her behaviour?

In three years, she has never found evidence of cheating. That’s a strong indicator that there isn’t any. There’s actually more evidence of her own cheating with a VD co-star.

Anyway, back to bifurcation! Definitely worth a celebration.

 

[Mardybum41]

I will never ever justify abuse. I wanted to end my life after being lied to for many years by an older man.
I read the texts which IG put to the court. These were all after he had said he wanted to leave and this came as a surprise.
I read about the things IG says AE would say to him. I believe these things have hurt him. I say horrible things to my adult siblings as jokes, as they do to me. One used to always joke about how blind and deaf any husband would have to be. It was always in context of general ribbing. It's lessened as we got older. I don't assume that AE was having any 'banter' with IG though many of her posts do show her at least trying to be funny, though many here don't find it so.

In many countries lying to people isn't a crime, nor is cheating. In some places it is. In Austria the age of consent is 14. In other countries it's not. I just thought I'd say my feelings here which are that I would very much want to know what the truth was about the new relationship, not least to know whether my spouse was sleeping with someone else whilst still doing so with me too.

IG isn't a poor isolated young man who grafts on the building site before he went home to his ungrateful wife. He's a rich actor who, yes, hired a nanny. AE seems to imply that he didn't like being around the family for too long as he gets bored. I haven't seen any of AE's acting, do you think it's not good?

Maybe if things calm down a bit after the divorce is granted then they will start to get more agreements in place about co-parenting. I just wanted to say that I have sympathy for anyone wanting to know the truth in terms of whether their loved ones (which could be family members not just other halves) have lied or are lying. It made me question so much to find out the lies one person had told me and that they'd done it whilst claiming to 'love me' as well as using me for a lot of things.

Why are you more concerned about whether there might or might not have been an affair than the actual pages and pages of proven abuse? Stop looking for reasons to justify how she has acted. She’s an mean slovenly cunt of a woman who deserves to spend her life alone for what she has put her children through.
Even if he was ‘flirting’ with BW.
She didn’t just abuse him when he left, it went in and on for months. Him and everyone around him. Go start your own rave thread with the halfwit brother, the NZ danger and the fucking mad texan.
And just in case we have indeed had a visit from Mad Regina Alice or one of her abuse apologists,

With absolutely no respect, FUCK OFF back to your sewer, we have a divorce to celebrate and a wedding to prepare for, and you are ruining our vibe.

 

[Lulugrace]

explosition in BH soon

Oh fuck meeeeee!!!!
mAlice is gonna lose her shit, she isn't having a good week is she

Edit - SB has 3.2m followers on insta

 

[M33L4]

With respect, fuck right off.

 

[M33L4]

You’re all being way more polite than me

 

[AllFurCoatNoKnickers1]

Yo trying to get free finally

Thanks for sharing the doc. Honestly, it’s pretty compelling and there’s no good reason to delay. Hopefully he’ll get a notice today that it’s still on for Monday.

 

[Mad Betty]

Someone can be charming, witty, engaging, and intelligent and still be abusive and potentially dangerous.

Lest we forget Ted Bundy who was handsome, intelligent, and charming as hell.

He was also a psychopath who killed for sport.

That is all.

MOO.

 

[Mad Betty]

May I ask where can I find that book about Gill and her family? The one AE said she received that big forward to write almost 3 years ago.

Surely it's out now, no?

 

[EllaBells]

Who put 50p in the slot?

 

[Mad Betty]

I am all in for Elise Greenberg being the girls' GAL.

This is such a good thing for everyone involved.

MOO.

 

[Hoopla]

Maybe it's actually Al's new lawyer trying to put the feelers out on some of his arguments.

He's only got two days to get up to speed after all.

 

[Umbridge]

Peter Hitchens often writes about no-fault divorce. I wondered if anyone here feels that yes, marriage is a contract and why should the one who wants to breaks that not have some consequence.

Didnt Alice break the contract to "love honour and obey" when she shagged a VD co star, had a very public twitter flirtation/ breakdown with MITH, threatened to divorce Ioan for someone better or when she was rollong round drunk on the floor in the afternoon?

So, what consequences do you think Alice should face? Because I think being divorced is the perfect response.

 

[Nadia Vulvokov]

Bless him, fair play to him for standing his ground. I really hope once the bifurcation and custody hearings are finalised he will speak out publicly about the affect AE has had on him and B. Around 1 in 6 men suffer from domestic abuse and his story could help men who are in need. Although I also totally would get it if he just wanted to move on and close the door on the last 20 plus years!