VIDEO SUMMARY
Vlogmas Day 11
Happy Day
Starting off the vlog setting the camera outside on a dog walk and then walking towards it... we need to come up with a name for her doing this lame camera shite she keeps doing.
She's going on about how she loves the ball thrower stick she has for Lola "imagine having an arm this long" I wish she'd throw the ball at the camera and break the damn thing.
2 minutes later and we're home, she's in her utility room while her camera is set up in the other room. She's busy today, got a lotta "braaaaaaand" things to film. First of all she needs to shoot in the downstairs bathroom so she's setting up her other camera. We got camera on camera action her folks.
View attachment 343177
"Today is a work day...." she slips up "...w...w....well
every day is a work day... but today is a.... heh....
BRANDED work day...." you don't sound at all convincing there, Helga.
"It's action packed"
Cut to later and she's saying she just got a load of content done and sent across "and now I'm sitting here like 'now what?'...."
She hasn't eaten anything yet day bar some chocolate, and as it's half 2 she's debating some lunch.
"I WAS gunna start doing sum wrappin', as today's vlogmas I wanted to focus on wrappin' paperrrrr" she sings "and wrappin' stuff.... however.... because it's not a conventional working day for Filwhip, he's actually going to be back home in half an hour.... so I don't want to go and get all the wrapping stuff and the presents and then have to stop in half an hour"
....or y'know you could take into a room and tell him not to come in, like the spare room or the office... OR.... OR!!!! Tell him to fuck off upstairs while you're 'working' y'know, cos it's your fucking house.
These are the same excuses as to why she couldn't do a proper gift guide, because Fil was coming home - can she not plan out her fucking content properly?? It has to suffer because she has to work around the latest boyfriend - it's pathetic.
She's going to wait until she has a 'full day' to do the wrapping, probably tomorrow.
Cut to the kitchen "the house is a hell hole again" she laughs, as she sticks her head into the fridge
View attachment 343181
"I swear to God, it's just constant mess"
Apparently it's because she's had a lot of post this week, now she's telling us how she has to flat pack and recycle all the cardboard boxes. And after lunch she's going to have another clean up. Which I'm sure we'll have to witness... again....Fun.
Close up of her sarnie with everything falling out. After lunch she sat scrolling for half an hour.
Cut to later and she's in her office, setting up her other camera to film a reel
View attachment 343184
And because it's in portrait mode she's explaining that she needs to turn the camera portrait to film it. Smarts.
She complains about her dress tripping it up, so we get a great shot of her leggings which she's rolled up underneath
View attachment 343186
This vlog is so fun.
She complains that she can't see a thing on her camera and wishes she had a monitor to view her cankles.
She's got a basket of boots to put on and film... and here we go... we're watching the behind the scenes of her walking backwards and forwards in front of a camera. If there's jumping involved I think I may wee myself from excitement.
View attachment 343193
Aww... no jumping. I'm sooooo sad.
Editing is all done now, and BAD KIRBY EGG FIL is missing, she doesn't know where he is. "Where are yoooou?" she ponders ".....erm..... I dunno where Fil is" she repeats. It's ok, he probably has no idea where he is either.
"He said he'd be home at half 3, it's now half 4"
View attachment 343204
"I'm not SUPER NEEDY... or like you know 'you're, you're a MINUTE late'..... but like.... mmnnnah.... also.... WHERE ARE YOOOOU???" she whines
View attachment 343213
Now she has to go clean the house..... "well not clean... tidy the house. It's DISGUSTING"
Is she checking for Fil down the back of the sofa?
View attachment 343214
Oh no, she's just putting all the lights on.
She's tidying the nut crumb area. Putting the Quality Streets back in their tin so she can use her star dish for other things.
"there's a bloody plaster on there!!! GROSS! FILLLLL AND HIS GAMMY FINGER!!!" she says as she gives all the arse shots she can in this portion of the video
View attachment 343216
She's bending over with arse to camera while singing Christmas songs. This is content.
"Right let's sort my life out, lets sort this house out!" cut to the back of Fil's greasy hair
View attachment 343222
"Fil's 'ome. We can't be bovvered to cook. So we're going in the freezer" ....to get things to cook?
Fil's rummaging around while Bosserz is telling him which foods are a no no because "ideally" they have to be defrosted.
I'm surprised Fil hasn't turned around yet and snapped to her "YOU WANT TO LOOK FOR YOURSELF?" she's so close to him she's practically pushing him in there
View attachment 343228
Oh now she's taken charge. Fil suggest frozen doner kebabs, but she "ain't 'aving frozen doner kebabs. Silly KIRBY EGG.
View attachment 343231
"Why not?" says EGG
"THEY LOOK DISGUSTING" moans Helga.
"I bough them ages ago to take to Josh's but..." Trails off Fil while Helga gives him an icy stare
View attachment 343232
We're spending a loooooooong time deciding what to eat here folks.
And they've finally decided what to eat "We don't 'ave any garlic bread though..." laughs Helen, hinting at Fil to get some....
"is that FIL go to the shop and get some?"
"noooooooo.... it's fine" says Helen, remembering that the camera is rolling
Cut to Helga flat packing boxes, singing a non Christmas song *shock*
And now cut to the kitchen "although we said we can't be bothered to cook.... we're still cooking" What's the betting she wanted a takeaway but KIRBY EGG said no?
Oh, and it looks like she did make Fil go out to get garlic bread as she has some in hand.
"there's going to be quite a lot of food here isn't there?" Helen... there's ALWAYS a lot of food there darling
Fil mumbles something (even the auto subs can't pick up what he says) and Helga replies "Yeah, whilst YOU have a MCDONALDS!!!"
"ALL RIGHT JELLY BELLY!" Fil yells back, (Kirby EGG and Jelly Belly - what a power couple)
Helen tries to laugh it off "no, that's fine... I can just have it for my lunch tomorrow...... I AM jelly belly... I'm very jelly belly. I want a McDonalds...."
Fil says they can get one Saturday when they go into the city.
Is anyone still reading this? It's super fun isn't it. Type the word Jelly Belly if you're still here.
Helga is getting super excited about going into the city on Saturday "OOOOH!!! YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS IN THE CITY???" Covid, Helen. Covid is in the city.
"BREAD SAUCE!!!!!!" It's all about food with her. "WE CAN GET A LOVELY PASTRY!!!"
She's cracked open some booze, and says that she hopes to beat the crowds on Saturday morning to go Christmas shopping. This is a girl who works from home and can go into town ANY time and day of the week, but sure... pick the absolute busiest day to go in Helga.
She thinks Fil should cook for her more often because he knows what he's doing more than she does
View attachment 343243
"Shall we have cheese with it?" asks Jelly Belly
"Yeah, a FUCK LOAD of it!!!!" says Kirby Egg
She explains her plan for tomorrow to Fil, she's going to film a reaaally quick make up look in the morning and then she's going to wrap the Christmas presents all while probably eating mince pies that she's going to buy.
"I might also drink prosecco all day long while being all festive. You'll come home from revision and I'll be on the floor" she takes a swig of her beer
Fil moans about the low fat cheese (I think that's what he's mumbling about, as usual the CC can't pick up a word from him)
"Im SORRY! It's the, it's the dieter brainwashed into, in me to buy all the lighter things. I'm just trying to get out of that mindset alright!" She shows the camera the lighter cheese that Fil is unhappy with. "That's what diet culture does to you. Brainwashes you. I'm not 'appy, I'm not pleased about it"
More food talk, she's asking Fil to buy the Christmas cheeses on Saturday.
Dinner is served
"Do you know wot?" says Helga,
"Double cheese?" Fil replies,
"Double cheese"
"You say that sooo much 'you know wot'" mimics Fil
"My mum would always reply with 'cold potatoes aren't hot'"
"That's what I say to you!"
"Yeah but she... I can't help it... I'm sorry that I say that" Says Miss Unapologetic-unless-you're-a-man
"Don't apologize for saying it"
"Okay.... I just can't 'elp it"
They talk to each other soooooo oddly.
Cut to later and she's stroking the dogs and watching TV
That's all.
Kirby Egg and Jelly Belly's adventures are fun.
so perfectly spelled to convey that bizarre mockney accent.
'
but when I watched the one of her and Fil cooking she seemed like she was on something like a benzodiazepine, as well as drinking...
