Stubborn friends are a tough thing to deal with.Its been rather a dramatic week.
My partner and I have a friend that we've known for years, my partner has known him since childhood. He has various health problems, and has been housebound for a few years. He has been deteriorating for quite some time, but he is a very stubborn person and up until this point, he has refused to see a doctor
On Thursday he phoned my partner to tell him he was in a great deal of pain. To cut a long story short, the friend finally agreed to make an appointment with his doctor. But the doctor told him that he could not see him until this Tuesday. Over the weekend, he fell on the floor in his bathroom and bruised his eye. Then on Monday, my partner tried to phone him, but his phone was switched off. My partner went round to the friend's house, and found him on the bathroom floor. He had been there for 12 hours, and was dehydrated. We should have taken the opportunity to phone for an ambulance, but we didn't. I wish we had of done, it would have saved us from the nightmare situation that occured afterwards.
The friend received a text from his Doctor's surgery later that evening, to say that Tuesday's appointment had been cancelled because his Doctor was working from home because of Covid! I was absolutely livid, our friend has been trying to get treatment for a back injury he received from another fall, a few months ago, he damaged his coccyx and has been in constant pain since then.
Instead of going to the Doctor on Tuesday, we spent the best part of the day phoning NHS 111 and trying to get some treatment for our friend. We were unsuccessful, I had to leave the friends flat because I was so stressed out. But we did manage to get an appointment at the surgery for Friday. This meant that we would somehow manage to transport the friend, who has mobility problems, 5 miles to the surgery which recently moved out of town!
I called in at the friends place yesterday, to see how he was doing. When I got there, he was talking to NHS 111 again, because the situation had worsened. He has been having difficulty passing urine, and was in extreme discomfort. Once again, NHS 111 were not that helpful, it was decided that I would try to take the friend to the A&E department by taxi. But we decided to give NHS 111 one last try. We finally managed to get the friend referred to the emergency department at our local hospital a little later on
Because of the friends mobility issues, I was concerned about getting him down a flight of stairs, and along a long pathway to reach a taxi. So I phoned for an ambulance, I'm afraid I dialed 999. I felt awful having to do this. A while later, the ambulance came the paramedics spoke to the friend, but it was obvious that they were not pleased with being called out for a non emergency. I was growing increasingly frustated with the friend, because he was focusing on his waterworks problems, and not mentioning his other problems. It all became too much, and I went into another room, I might have ended up ranting at the friend, if I had stayed.
The paramedics were sympathetic, and finally agreed to drive the friend to the hospital because his blood pressure was high! Later on, he was transfered to the Acute assessment unit. I sincerely hope that the friend will get the treatment he desperately needs. We just have to wait and see.
So don't beat yourself up about not getting him treatment sooner.
You can't make someone get help if they are reluctant to do it.
And also you mustn't feel guilty about not calling an ambulance when he was on the floor.
Feel relieved that you found him and that he has now been seen by medical professionals.
Just make sure they know about all the incidents so they can act accordingly.
You have done a good thing by getting him seen.
That's the main thing.
Let's hope his issues now get sorted.