Oh dear the rats were comedy gold. Dezza was marched down to the cooncil to complain. Jokes on them, the mice came cos they heard there was gonna be a cheeseboard but there was only rustlers burgers, pickled onions and crackers on a piece of wood?
- Status
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How did the rats turn up at the hoose? I thought they'd see Marion's face and duck reet off!It was the time when we were all assured at least 32 times that him n Derek pay βfuhl rentβ
Rats (or squirrels?) quite rightly didnβt give 2 fucks about that minor detail
Ah council letterbox gate. Absolute comedy gold my lovelies
I've found out Mario's new job.
I'm just going through his numerous stories and the Rayn one cracked me up!
"SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER"
"SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER"
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#ratgate .is somewhere on this thread, this is from the carnage that was last years christmas night oot with tha lassies, I think it is just after this. Anyway it is well worth a read because that whole thread is actually brilliant. We had so much material to work with back then
Cleaning With Mario #3
Did he say he wants tae get steamin' this weekend? Hope that's after he rescues the lasses from their makeup disasters
tattle.life
Ok have found #ratgate, it is from here
Cleaning with Mario #4
I still follow him, I donβt know why... Everything about him irritates the life out of me but yet, I cannot stop!!!
tattle.life
Can't stop laughing. II'm just going through his numerous stories and the Rayn one cracked me up!
"SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER"
Rayn, the wee witch. 
Mario : "Come here or wee Rayn. Daddy loves ya, you little witch.!"I'm just going through his numerous stories and the Rayn one cracked me up!
"SURPRISE MOTHER FUCKER"
Rayn: . ......
Sadly, he wonβt be out doing the slosh with his ladies this year X
To whatever genius first came up with "Melvin"So.... I'm bored on da bus and I'm on da bus bored...
'Bitter' sound aboot right, so aye!
.This just resonated so much that Ive never looked back and now I know why.
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No wayyyyy!!To whatever genius first came up with "Melvin"
Haha! 
βUnexpected item in bagging areaβ and he turns up with his laminated swipey thing, jumping to the conclusion that youβve scanned a sirloin steak through as a tub of DairyleaThought you were going to tell us you saw him working there
I was the Melvin originator although I never knew that meaning. I used to work with a real Melvin and he was the oddest, creepiest little man that I've ever met, so I just called Melv Melvin because of that. Who knew though? Council protectorTo whatever genius first came up with "Melvin"
Unlike the blind nikita dug the rats did indeed see his face - and upon viewing his shrewish features and pointed snout, they were misguided into believing he was one of their ownHow did the rats turn up at the hoose? I thought they'd see Marion's face and duck reet off!
That's my bedtime reading sorted tonight
Rate gate was one of my faves ever! I wouldnβt even know how to start describing what happened
Omg!!Unlike the blind nikita dug the rats did indeed see his face - and upon viewing his shrewish features and pointed snout, they were misguided into believing he was one of their own
I bet they'd rather cuddle him than Rayn! - Status