Yes, that was it! Knew it was something that relied on them being a couple. It always stuck in my head for how weird it must have felt for them both.
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Yes! I know what video you're talking about!
At the end, she grins at him and he just looks so vacant!
Don't know what the feeling was there but he wasn't happy...
At the end, she grins at him and he just looks so vacant!
Don't know what the feeling was there but he wasn't happy...
This is the video where she makes the allegations. Back then she answered a comment saying it wasn't physical abuse, just punching walls. That comment is nowhere to be found (or at least difficult to find, didn't look that long).Anyone stumbling upon that video will assume Pete was violent and physically abused him and that's crappy if that wasn't the case
I'd forgotten which video it was, thank you for finding it.
It sounds to me she is trying to plant the seed for people to ask questions. She wants people to question it, she wants people to speculate.
I'm finding it really hard to believe Pete was an abuser. She never addressed it like she did with Alex Day. She just vaguely liked comments when they asked if it was Pete. Their former mutual friends in common, sided with Pete.
I am in NO WAY victim shaming but this all doesn't add up.
If it was true, why have they not sided with Carrie? Why are they still friends with Pete? Why not make a video or back up the accusations?
Something doesn't sit right with me on this. At all.
I think it’s because of the actual incidents. It was non violent, he threw stuff and broke something. I can’t remember the details but she said it was more of an aggression issue . Which is fair enough !
I mean the aggression itself can be terrifying though (I know you've said fair enough, I'm just making a point rather than a point aimed "at" you) - I lived with an aggressive alcoholic for two and a half years, and while the worst thing that happened to me was getting my foot shut in a door, being around that level of unpredictability and fuelled a lot of pre-existing anxiety.
Don't get me wrong, I find her very annoying, but someone doesn't have to be violent at you for it to take its toll.
That's very true, you don't have to be violent to be an abuser.
I don't know, I guess we will never know.
I may not be a fan of her anymore but if she was abused, I would absolutely be on her side, no question. As a victim of emotional abuse myself, I know what it's like to go through mind games and aggression.
I'm also not saying she has to sit there and give us every tiny detail about their relationship. We don't need to know, that's their business and if the wish to share it, that's for them to decide.
However, it just doesn't sit right with me. You don't just throw an accusation like around before vaguely like people's comments when they question you.
Accusations like that can ruin people. It could have ruined him.
I don't know, I guess we will never know.
I may not be a fan of her anymore but if she was abused, I would absolutely be on her side, no question. As a victim of emotional abuse myself, I know what it's like to go through mind games and aggression.
I'm also not saying she has to sit there and give us every tiny detail about their relationship. We don't need to know, that's their business and if the wish to share it, that's for them to decide.
However, it just doesn't sit right with me. You don't just throw an accusation like around before vaguely like people's comments when they question you.
Accusations like that can ruin people. It could have ruined him.
I also agree with that, alluding to things doesn't help anyone, let alone victims of abuse.
My issue with it at the time was how she dealt with it. Making a vague accusation and then just liking any comment naming Pete to keep people speculating.
I think she could have used her platform to have been more vocal to support others and raise awareness. She could been like this is my experience, this wasn't right, this shows that relationships can appear perfect when they're not, here are some resources to help if your going through something similar.
It must have been hard if Pete was abusive to have so much pressure from fans to be a perfect Disney couple but she created that persona. I also think she should have learnt from that and not been as public with Oliver and also kept some of her own space once she left the flat, instead he moved into her brothers and then straight into her new house.
I think she could have used her platform to have been more vocal to support others and raise awareness. She could been like this is my experience, this wasn't right, this shows that relationships can appear perfect when they're not, here are some resources to help if your going through something similar.
It must have been hard if Pete was abusive to have so much pressure from fans to be a perfect Disney couple but she created that persona. I also think she should have learnt from that and not been as public with Oliver and also kept some of her own space once she left the flat, instead he moved into her brothers and then straight into her new house.
I quite agree.
She did a video talking about Alex Day as I know she stated in that he was controlling an abusive.
I massively respected her for that video and thought it was great she was using her platform to speak out, and be so open about it. Especially when it was evident how difficult it was for her. That's the Carrie I loved.
She definitely created that persona and always tried to depict a perfect relationship. It definitely wasn't perfect as you could just tell from their videos no matter how much they tried to sugarcoat everything they did together.
I would have respected her (probably the wrong choice of words) more had she just backed it up in some way. Rather than just the vagueness of it all.
If she wasn't comfortable talking about it, she shouldn't have said anything and then come out with when she was ready.
Just to add, just because all the friends sided with one person, doesn’t mean that person was in the right. I’m not saying Pete was definitely an abuser, but you often find abusers are very convincing and good at gaining empathy. It’s not uncommon for victims of abuse to lose all their friends in a split or after reveal of abuse.
Maybe the mutual friends realised that Carrie has quite a toxic personality behind closed doors.
I don't blame Pete for his frustration, punching walls and destruction of property is not condonable, but you could see that towards the end of their relationship she was always making snarky comments to him and constantly putting him down or bursting his bubble.
I felt kinda sorry for him, she does that with ollie, the constant Carrie show charade nothing matters but me! I'm the star of the show not you.
I don't blame Pete for his frustration, punching walls and destruction of property is not condonable, but you could see that towards the end of their relationship she was always making snarky comments to him and constantly putting him down or bursting his bubble.
I felt kinda sorry for him, she does that with ollie, the constant Carrie show charade nothing matters but me! I'm the star of the show not you.
See, one of things I remember most about the whole Alex Day situation was that Carrie was really bad at victim blaming when it all came out. I understand she was relatively young (I want to say 19?) but her main issue seemed to be 'these girls slept with my boyfriend!' rather than 'my boyfriend coerced/bullied our friends into sleeping with him!', to the point of texting at least of the girls to chew her out
I don't remember if she ever apologised or acknowledged that what she did wasn't right (and maybe she did and grew from it) but that was the point where I started losing respect for her and it became difficult to regain it, especially with how she dealt with the Pete thing.Obviously if she ever did feel unsafe in her relationship, that's not okay - but when you're a public figure, especially when your relationships have been as public as hers, you kinda don't get that luxury of only revealing what you want to afterwards. People were always going to guess identities, etc, and by trying to hide those aspects - yet also deliberately giving indirect hints such as liking correct 'guesses' - it almost made it seem a bit insincere. And I understand that's quite unfair to say because it's a really tricky and entirely unfair position to be in, where you can't only reveal what you feel comfortable with because everyone already knows too much... but withholding that level of honesty from your audience while still wanting the sympathy that comes from being honest makes it a lot harder to give that sympathy - if that all makes sense?
I always remember this video Pete did a few months after all of this and I thought at the time he was talking about his relationship with Carrie and how it ended.
Oooh, I has actually forgotten about that until you mentioned it so I hold my hands up there!See, one of things I remember most about the whole Alex Day situation was that Carrie was really bad at victim blaming when it all came out. I understand she was relatively young (I want to say 19?) but her main issue seemed to be 'these girls slept with my boyfriend!' rather than 'my boyfriend coerced/bullied our friends into sleeping with him!', to the point of texting at least of the girls to chew her out
Obviously if she ever did feel unsafe in her relationship, that's not okay - but when you're a public figure, especially when your relationships have been as public as hers, you kinda don't get that luxury of only revealing what you want to afterwards. People were always going to guess identities, etc, and by trying to hide those aspects - yet also deliberately giving indirect hints such as liking correct 'guesses' - it almost made it seem a bit insincere. And I understand that's quite unfair to say because it's a really tricky and entirely unfair position to be in, where you can't only reveal what you feel comfortable with because everyone already knows too much... but withholding that level of honesty from your audience while still wanting the sympathy that comes from being honest makes it a lot harder to give that sympathy - if that all makes sense?
That is crappy though. That is something she should absolutely atone for.
It completely makes sense what you say and I completely agree with you!
I lost respect for her when she was beginning the Addams family tour and during Heather's as well. There were a few things that bothered me and something's gotta give eventually...
- The way she handled the Pete thing... I won't repeat myself again as I don't want to bore everyone but that put a sour taste in my mouth.
- the way she threw herself at Oliver and we were still under the impression she was with Pete.
- There was one Q and A where she asked for critism and then got super irate and huffy when people did what she asked?
- Her attitude getting worse and coming off as very, very smug. She also came across as a know-it-all.
- The way she tried to skinny shame. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being big or small, as long as you are happy and healthy.
However, she made it seem like it was awful to be thin (she conveniently forgets she was thin once) and went through a weird phase of insisting she was plus size when she's probably the UK standard size.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that but don't tear others down. It's disgusting.
From the way it looks to an outsider, she was emotionally abusive towards Pete.
People shouldn't victim-blame, of course...but they also shouldn't take everything at face value when evidence (the way she spoke down to him - and that was publicly, so god knows how she was behind closed doors. The way she threw herself at Oliver when she was still with Pete) suggests there's another side to the story.
Look at Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. JD was crucified online at first, and it ended up coming out that he was the victim.
People shouldn't victim-blame, of course...but they also shouldn't take everything at face value when evidence (the way she spoke down to him - and that was publicly, so god knows how she was behind closed doors. The way she threw herself at Oliver when she was still with Pete) suggests there's another side to the story.
Look at Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. JD was crucified online at first, and it ended up coming out that he was the victim.
Absolutely, completely agree with not taking everything at face value. There are two sides to the story.
I seems like a lot of people including myself noticed the way she would talk down to him and as you say, heaven knows what she was like with him when the camera was turned off. For a while, I thought it was just me until I discovered GG and TL.
The JD and AH situation is a perfect example of how people can easily be manipulated into believing one person's version of events.
When Carrie clarified in the comments of that video she said "There was never violence against me, there were walls being punched. The person in question is getting help". She was saying she dumped him because of these events, and yes, anger from a partner can definitely be scary and something you'd want to get out of. Sounds like she wanted to say that it happened and that this sort of behaviour is not ok,, but that he is a person who sees his anger issues and is actively doing something about it, which doesn't sound like she wanted him to be condemned as an abuser. She definitely should have clarified this in the bleeping video instead of vaguely saying he was "aggressive and violent".
Agreed, if she didn't want him to be condemned as an abuser then she shouldn't put out vague information. I also agree that she was perhaps emotionally abusive to Pete. I feel like she knew how to wind him up, and I don't think it's fair to goad, belittle and treat someone like tit then use their reaction against them for video trying to validate your stunt casting in a show, like wtf??? I feel like the situation was a toxic one. If my partner spoke to me the way Carrie speaks to her boyfriends (weirdly aggressive and petulant and as if they're thick and she sooo much smarter), I would be pretty tense and angry too. I'm not condoning violence of any kind, I just think the situation is more nuanced than she's letting on.
But we already know Carrie likes to paint herself as the victim. Like someone mentioned above, in the Alex Day scandal she attacked some of the girls he manipulated and slept with, not allowing them any empathy. Her "working class" roots. Her long blog posts about privilege where she still somehow ends up the victim. Her posting about "crying in Oliver's arms" when she had to take a day off of Adams due to illness. She wrote a whole book about the meanie hater understudy slut who hated her because she wasn't like other girls.
But we already know Carrie likes to paint herself as the victim. Like someone mentioned above, in the Alex Day scandal she attacked some of the girls he manipulated and slept with, not allowing them any empathy. Her "working class" roots. Her long blog posts about privilege where she still somehow ends up the victim. Her posting about "crying in Oliver's arms" when she had to take a day off of Adams due to illness. She wrote a whole book about the meanie hater understudy slut who hated her because she wasn't like other girls.
It must have ate her up inside that Oliver posted a picture with Kirsty Ingram as Wednesday and barely acknowledged Carrie at all.Her posting about "crying in Oliver's arms" when she had to take a day off of Adams due to illness. She wrote a whole book about the meanie hater understudy slut who hated her because she wasn't like other girls.
The photos he posted regularly with Summer in them were so adorable, as well. He looked genuinely happy and so did she.
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