The Frugality/Alexandra Stedman #8 her trainers work harder than she does

[skyehigh]

She heavily implied that it is due to the pandemic - but that's just not true, we've been paying for swimming lessons since summer of 2021 - pools HAVE been open.

And the cost (at a London leisure centre!) is around £27 a month - so less than a Pret subscription. Priorities Alex!

Somewhat related, I was influenced by this thread (not Alex) to get the Aya Hindmarch shopper - and can confirm it's great for swimming, fits three towels and all our stuff!

 

[MedeaWho]

I couldn’t believe she used the pandemic as an excuse as to why there kids haven’t been swimming. The pools have re-opened two years ago! She’s just too lazy to deal with kids swim lessons.

 

[TreeTrunksApplePie]

So depressing. I’m not a mum (yet) but I’m so sick of this narrative all over insta of people whinging about holidays with children. How tit it is, how they can’t go anywhere nice, how the kids wake up at 4am, how they have to sit in silence. Wtf!!

Couldn’t agree more and I am now a mum, it annoyed me before I was one and it still does.

I honestly want to ask people like this why they bothered having kids. I’m not saying every moment is a walk on the park but some people especially social media influencers seem to constantly moan. I hate when half term starts and you have to deal with a week of ‘content’ which is basically people moaning about having to spend time with their own kids

 

[Debarkle]

Yeah it’s def a thing now. Alice Vincent has just had a baby and it’s a bit like she’s the first person to have one.
I saw this on Twitter the other day too, and it’s like, what were you expecting once you have a child? Your life will change! They should be your number priority. Having children isn’t actually compulsory. It is possible to live a full life without them. The way some people talk about their children is v depressing.

 

[Greencatfysh]

Couldn’t agree more and I am now a mum, it annoyed me before I was one and it still does.

I honestly want to ask people like this why they bothered having kids. I’m not saying every moment is a walk on the park but some people especially social media influencers seem to constantly moan. I hate when half term starts and you have to deal with a week of ‘content’ which is basically people moaning about having to spend time with their own kids

It honestly makes me question whether I want kids. When I have for my entire life. But now I’m in my thirties it’s like… do I? Everyone makes it look horrific

 

[influencerbore]

It honestly makes me question whether I want kids. When I have for my entire life. But now I’m in my thirties it’s like… do I? Everyone makes it look horrific

I’m not going to lie, it’s bloody challenging at times but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love my kids more than I ever knew I could. Do I miss my child free days? Yeah sometimes but I had kids in my late 30’s so I feel like I smashed the tit out of life before them so have no regrets! They bring me pure joy every day…even if they can be right twats at times!

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

It honestly makes me question whether I want kids. When I have for my entire life. But now I’m in my thirties it’s like… do I? Everyone makes it look horrific

I don’t want to try and convince you because everyone has different circumstances and preferences - but can assure you that parenthood is a joy for those that engage in it and are honest/realistic about what it is.

Also we have to remember that these people are trying to mine engagement so they can flog their audience to brands. No one’s going to comment on a post about how lovely a day out to a duck pond was followed by a pizza party for dinner are they, everyone comments on bs like how can I get more sleep/what do you do to feel more you/rah rah rah. It’s all so bleeping fake.

 

[Emalabemela]

Couldn’t agree more and I am now a mum, it annoyed me before I was one and it still does.

I honestly want to ask people like this why they bothered having kids. I’m not saying every moment is a walk on the park but some people especially social media influencers seem to constantly moan. I hate when half term starts and you have to deal with a week of ‘content’ which is basically people moaning about having to spend time with their own kids

Totally agree I used to be a teacher and it really ground my gears when parents would complain when they have their kids for far less time than we had them. Why have them if you don’t want to spend any time with them? I don’t know how they feel comfortable complaining openly. I think it’s so sad.
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It honestly makes me question whether I want kids. When I have for my entire life. But now I’m in my thirties it’s like… do I? Everyone makes it look horrific

Ah don’t let twatty influencers put you off honestly it’s an absolute joy. So hard at times and also so incredibly lovely. I used to just stare at my baby and cry happy tears of an evening - and I’m not a crier… like at all. But yeah I had mine at 37 (still shat myself when I got pregnant as if I was 17 ) but it’s properly life changing/ meaning of life tit! I highly recommend it.

 

[atome74]

Totally agree with the sentiment that Alex tries very, very hard to whinge about all the bad parts of their holiday to make it seem "relatable". The problem is she crosses the line into coming across as completely daft. Who bleeping cares if you forgot dishwashing liquid - you haven't gone to Timbuktu, go to the local shop and buy some!

To the person questioning whether they even want kids - pleeeaaase do not let carefully orchestrated whinges put you off! Yes kids are hard work but they are utterly joyful and honestly, they are little for such a short time. I don't miss wiping up after a 2yo but it feels like you blink and they're off to school.

 

[Exhaustednurse]

Alex’s moaning about the holiday is reflective of the fact that they have so little stress / juggling to manage despite her saying they do daily.

When my kids were that age, that would have been something really fun and we would have planned the best break we could. Working full time, commuting etc would have meant that any break, away from work, would have been embraced and enjoyed my not only me but DH and the kids. When you are truly up against it, any break is a treat and is enjoyed with gratitude

 

[TreeTrunksApplePie]

It honestly makes me question whether I want kids. When I have for my entire life. But now I’m in my thirties it’s like… do I? Everyone makes it look horrific

Honestly, it has its hard moments but that’s easily outweighed by the happy moments. Best decision I ever made. It’s down to the individual of course but these influencers can’t be trusted.

Imagine how resentful these kids will feel as they get older. I would have been gutted if I knew my parents were complaining about me like this online

 

[Dustye]

Sorry to add to the parenting chat but agree with what everyone has said - personally I found the baby stage really hard but from toddler age up, when they develop their own personalities and preferences, it's so fun. I have so much more fun at the weekends/on holiday with my little one than I did pre-kid, being able to hang out at museums, get them into swimming, teaching them to ride a bike etc is just great. And on things like swimming - my MIL is terrified of water so never taught her kids to swim (or ride a bike) and not having those skills has affected their confidence so much as adults. Not to mention, it's a life-saving skill!

 

[Tiger tat]

Sorry to add to the parenting chat but agree with what everyone has said - personally I found the baby stage really hard but from toddler age up, when they develop their own personalities and preferences, it's so fun. I have so much more fun at the weekends/on holiday with my little one than I did pre-kid, being able to hang out at museums, get them into swimming, teaching them to ride a bike etc is just great. And on things like swimming - my MIL is terrified of water so never taught her kids to swim (or ride a bike) and not having those skills has affected their confidence so much as adults. Not to mention, it's a life-saving skill!

You’ve taken the words out of my mouth! Baby stage put me through the WRINGER but the toddler stage is nicer. Even tantrums can be hilarious. Not always, but they can be.

There are SO MANY influencers who moan constantly about their children - Alex, Katherine Ormerod and Hannah Gale come to mind. Like… what did you think life would be like with two? Maybe that’s the difference though. I only have one

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Fundamentally the type of personality you’ve got to have to aspire/get into influencing is pretty grim - grabby, lazy, selfish, dishonest - and the anthesis of what a parent needs to be for their child. So it’s not a surprise a lot of them struggle? Ofc they’d struggle to care about anyone but themselves

 

[Dizzy]

Yeah just to echo the child chat, parenthood is without doubt relentlessly hard work and, in my personal experience, a bit soul destroying at times (I had PND with both my babies). But you will never know love like it and it is utterly life changing in a wonderful way. Before you have children you’re the most important person in your life and then they arrive and you realise that’s no longer the case. They bring so much joy and love and hilarity and wonder. Mine are teenagers now and are total bellends the vast majority of the time but it’s still an incredible journey to be on with them and I wouldn’t change a thing.

 

[Emalabemela]

Yes! to all of the above (Katherine ormerod really annoys me how much she whinges given that it seems she spends barely any time with her children weirdly people only ever seem to sing her praises on here)
Also as someone pointed out people who are happy to witch on a public forum about their own children (with images of them as well) is mind-bending. These poor kids! What happens when they potentially find these things written about them so publicly to thousands of people whilst simultaneously being used to gain thousand of pounds worth of sponsorships … it is all sooo icky. You signed up for influencing, not your children! I honestly hope they all rebel when they grow up and tell their grabby parents to f*ck off!

 

[Dizzy]

Yes! to all of the above (Katherine ormerod really annoys me how much she whinges given that it seems she spends barely any time with her children weirdly people only ever seem to sing her praises on here)

Come over to the KO thread! We certainly don’t always rave about her and I could not agree more with your comment about her kids!

 

[louderforthecheapseats]

The constant moaning about motherhood winds me up. I don’t have kids, we can’t have them but would love to have the chance. I don’t doubt it’d be hard but surely you realise your life is going to change? She’s so privileged to have two healthy children and she makes everything seem so grim

 

[Raker]

Yes, there’s a huge chasm between having a weary moan about baby ballet lesson costs, or the other cliquey mums at the leisure centre with a friend/OH, and constantly posting complaints about being a parent where they can be archived forever, and read by the “inconvenient” child when it grows up.

The first few years are intense and hard ranging from trying to keep an infant alive when you don’t know what you’re doing, to the exhausting WHY and NO years of toddlerhood. And you’re always broke, as children are expensive (nursery fees???!) and you’re always late for stuff because you can’t just “pop out” any more — everything is a necessary over production. I’m starting to sound like Michael McIntyre now, sorry….

you can’t be the same person you were in your carefree days, you evolve. You should be evolving anyway, parent or not. You need to respond to what life throws at you. Some people just can’t handle change - I think Alex & Dopey are prime examples, with their beige student food and handouts from the parents. They’re stuck in that post college/early career phase, and just haven’t matured.

But honestly, don’t discount parenthood, it’s absolutely amazing if you’re lucky enough to experience it xx

 

[AllTheGinJoints]

She really doesn’t know she’s born does she? “A slower pace” indeed