Thank you hun. I hope they saw it and maybe felt less alone even for a few moments. XYou are a diamond for reaching out to someone when things aren’t easy for you right now
I‘m thinking of you and @Phil McCrackin . Please know we‘re if you need some company x
Lots of love. I know how much our pets mean to us. Everything crossed for the biopsy xxMy dog is home from her op and she is okay
Biopsy results next week
And the best conversation we had was the final 15 minutes of our last session when we talked about her cats. I'm REALLY hoping I don't get her again this time (although knowing my luck I probably will).
It’s awful being awake during the night when things are tough, it just intensifies everything for me. And the following day gets off to a bad start automatically.Your words are so reassuring, particularly at this time of night, when things don’t seem so calm.
I never thought the 12-Steps would be open to someone like me. Can you access it other ways without taking resources from those who are in more need?
Hoping everyone is having a restful night.
No it certainly didn't come across like that! It was lovely of you to reach out so thank you. I'm sorry you struggle and am sending lots of love x
Yes! It’s a double edged sword because on one hand it’s good that more people are being open about mental illness and seeking help, but on the other… what you said. I could never do that, I don’t even mean it in a judgemental way, but when I have to explain things to people about something that’s happened because I’m depressed, it just makes me so ashamed you know?
let us know how it went xx
Yes, I feel this absolutely x
I just wanted to say I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what it’s like, but I understand what you’re saying. What you’re feeling must be so overwhelming that it would be impossible to see a way out of it. Grief is so exhausting, and disorientating, it will eventually get easier though. Please be patient to yourself, and keep talking to us if you feel up to it. You’re not rambling at all, it’s a lot to process on top of what you already deal with x
Thank you. It was someone else. It is fine@Into_the_tunnel i absolutely agree, I find the posts about ‘why don’t you just xyz’ infuriating and I have to ignore them. It’s not as simple as changing jobs when you can’t even manage to get out of bed.
Your comments about washing - I’m not sure whether you had an internal argument with yourself, or if it was someone else… I’m so sorry if it was someone else. I’m sure they thought they were helping, but that’s not the way to support, is it
We’re always here if you need us, even if you’re avoiding SM xx
I think, looking back on it, after 4 or 5 days of not leaving the house/bed/sofa each time I needed to be clean. I never felt better though. Ever. Why would I care about something being clean when I didn’t care about that thing in the first place? Which, if you haven’t been there, can’t be understood.
Make a list of five tasks every day that have to be done. Achievable small things. Tidying the house is enormous. Break it down. Clearing the floor and vacuuming. Cleaning the surfaces. A load of laundry. Emptying the sink. One thing at a time. It doesn’t have to be everything because then it will end up being nothing and you feel worse than ever. This way, with a task list, you get to tick items off and feel like you’ve achieved something and the day isn’t passing you by. Be kind to yourself, your doing your best x
You are me today, I've hit a real low, knew it was coming, but the feeling is awful. I've also loads to do, but I've crawled back to bed, had abit of a high earlier seen someone I haven't seen for years that was nice, but now I'm feeling meh. Take care x
Lenny I’m so so glad to hear you’re doing better, it’s not as easy as it soundsHello, I haven’t been on here in a wee while which is Classic Lenny. I had an increase in my medication and that combined with my son making good developmental progress has me feeling more able to cope, hopeful and able to take things a day at a time. So I’ve stopped writing things down, stopped contributing to it reading this thread (which is so beneficial to me) and stopped reading my Dr Julie Smith book…
I will find my place and go back and read the posts but I wanted to send you all love. I always find Bank Holidays a bit weird, like I ‘should’ be doing something, and in this case, something memorable. But that’s just because other people are doing stuff!
I hope you guys know how amazing you are. To find the strength to post when you’re feeling hopeless, lost, down…anything is beyond strong and if you can’t see that in yourselves then I’m here to tell you!
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You’re so sweet, what you‘ve said really is encouraging x
You are not unloveable. The fact that those exes did not love you the way you deserve does not define you. And you’re right, things will get better. It’s hard to believe that when you’re in the thick of it. Loneliness is hard, it magnifies the hurt and feelings. Keep talking, here and with professionals (as frustrating as getting the right help can be).Last few days have be tough I did a econsult today as getting through to the doctors are a nightmare10 hrs later I get a crappy message.... the kids dad was ment to have them this weekend but apparently had covid (although was in spain a few days b4) couldn't didn't realise when I'm ill there's an option not to parent oh no wait it's tough tits for me... lately I've been missing the guy I was seeing but of course a few months back I found out he was still with his wife and conned me out off a fair bit of money).... gave up dating then randomly started got chatting to someone and have for a while today he said he meet up (he has abit of a kinky side so i was a little wary) anyways I thought you only get one life and with how I've been feeling I thought why not.... then he was sending me messages being quite submissive.... told him they making me anxious he said it be fine anyways... he asked me to unlock the door and wait for his mate to arrive he be there soon..... I was like woah wait a min..... I literally froze to the spot I was shaken up and was in pure fear this guy who I thought wanted to finally meet up had basically arranged a complete stranger to come and shag me.... I feel sick that I've fallen for a bad guy (trust me im wary we spoken for some time now please dont judge) .... why am I so unlovable my ex was right now one will ever want me.... so that's just made how I was feeling 10x worse..... hopefully docs call tomorrow so I can start meds again because I know I need them again.... I just wanna feel normal & happy for once everything is getting on top and I feel like I'm drowning I'm back to making myself sick when I eat or I don't eat because I feel so huge.... i just feel so alone and i just need to be hugged and told i be okay
Sorry for the essay no need to respond either I just had to get it out and felt this was the only safe space to do it
Oh my goodness yes! It’s like sensory overload, plus exhaustion from being mentally on top form while there, plus the drive / journey, plus the worries about what might (won’t ever!) go wrong.
You have no need to apologise xSorry if I've caused problems
