Imagine if you were stuck in a shared ward with her. All you’d be able to hear from the bed next to you or across from you would be:
“OMG so hi sissy’s from this crap chair that I’m stuck in for the next 2 days which is actually 5 weeks in Sezzy time. I can’t believe they didn’t give me a bed. They told me they couldn’t fit one in here because it’s a shared ward and Macaw is the patient so he gets a cot and I get this uncomfortable squeaking chair that I have to sit in to sleep and breastfeed and watch the big dog on big brother HAHAHA shout out to the big dog guys he’s so funny, so hilarious. Anyway, so what was I saying? Oh yeah, they have no idea what they’re talking about guys … whatever. Anyway so it’s day 4 and I haven’t done a poo because no one will bring any poopy bloom to me at the hospiduuuul. Apparently Durt is too busy looking after our CrAzY ToDdLaHH to even think about doing anything for me ever. Is there anyone out there that can go to my house, pick up a carton for me and then bring it in to me? Like, I just can’t deal. I’ve been kept awake for the last 84 hours by this kid who is crying and it’s also been making it so hard to try and vlog this experience because I don’t want all the crying in the background when I’m trying to do my tropeaka ads guysssss like, whatever. And there’s just no natural light in this room, no sun whatsoever. It’s so tit. And guys, guysssss, you will not believe this … there is a COMMUNAL bathroom. Ewwww yuck dumb! How do they expect me to shower in there and do my full skin routine in there twice a day, like, I need my own bathroom guys! I’m just hating my life right now, like, I need to live my life you guyssss. This is so inconvenient when I have 5 million things I need to do for my 348 businesses that I am #bossbabeCEO of. Here’s Malarky guys HAHA wait while I shove the camera on his face HAHA you are giving me grey hairs kid and messing up my life just pretending you were blue HAHA you painted yourself blue didn’t you HAHA. By the way, here’s a new recipe for Slurry that I’m uploading tonight guysss. It’s the most amazing thing ever to celebrate that I’ve been magically cured of my dairy and gluten intolerances and they’re definitely not coming back at all even though I had stabbing gluten pains the other night whatever so it’s organic cheese on whole-wheat crackers and you will definitely not find this recipe anywhere else. It is exclusive to Slurry. If you see it in the coles food magazine it’s because they’ve copied me.”
Sis would get rolled by all the parents who are actually there to support and care for their kids.