Niomi Smart #81 Niomi & Donkey - Part Deux Manipulation Wins

[peaches98]

Well I'm shocked. Who knew seeing your fiancé having his bumhole massaged by a burly male Texan would give you the massive ick.

Surely this is worthy of the next thread title

 

[Shutterbug99]

Maybe he can cure her of her Dreamy Joey trauma.

Whatever he does, I'm sure it will involve him being very 'hands on' with her
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I think it's on purpose, just like Trump always hiring the most crooked lawyers, because they dont want to play by the rules, they go out of their way to bend them. He's the same, he seeks out other frauds just like him because he wants to learn their scheming ways, he doesn't want a certified professional analyzing his life and helping him, imagine how horrific that would have been for Jamie.
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"When you can't trust your own heart, you can't trust anything". I read that in my book today and made me think of Niomi. She did so much pretending and so much stuff for appearance I don't think even she knows who she is anymore, it's probably easier to manipulate someone like that. That's why he's always taking these courses, when she dumped him he amped it up. Creepy af.

And before lovely @Shutterbug99 asks which book I'm reading it's

Spoiler: Book

Empire of the Damned by Jay Kristoff just don't read the description of it on Amazon or Goodreads, its book 2 in a series and the description completely spoils ending of book 1, i hate it when they do that

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You know I love the book chat!

 

[Callan]

Niomi could totally afford to go private, let's be honest. But she'd rather get stuff for free even if it isn't very good or accurate. If she ever actually struggled to spawn with the donkey, I bet she'd go private and not through the NHS. Don't see her having the patience for that.

Liker Verity, she wrote a whole pamphlet about it, then was like, guess I'll just pay for it then myself... like why bother draining the system when you can get private care without much worry, plus you get it done faster.
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Exactly, she can afford to go private so what’s the hurry? Not like us peasants who need to try for 2 years before being referred to start treatment on the NHS…
I know she’s an adult and probably wouldn’t listen anyways but I wish her mum would have a serious conversation with her and say “look, I know you want to have a family and you’re worried about how your age factors into things - but rushing into marrying a donkey is not the way to deal with it”.
I mean, she’s only 32. She could still meet someone, get married and have 2 kids by the time she’s 40 if she left the donkey now.
Oh, but then I remember she’s pretty loopy now and snaring a husband might not be so easy.
I think had it not been for the pandemic she’d have probably met someone in the 18months after she split up with Joe, before she went off to Bali and this whole shit show started. Hell, she may have even been on track to get engaged to Forky in a year or so had she not been in such a hurry to get the deed done before turning 30.
Rambling now, apologies.

This was 3 years ago, guess she's in a rush all of a sudden lol

 

[Coldfeet]

It’s absolutely insane to me that in the two years they’ve been together they haven’t lived a domestic life together at all. A few weeks in Kensington, a few weeks in Dublin (which she hated), none of it spent in an actual place of their own. The rest of the time they’ve hopped from place to place. What does Niomi expect from life with Lordon? How many more years of couchsurfing, Bali trips, dodgy parties and sex retreats? Because I don’t think anything has changed at all, especially not him. She’s just desperate to have a boy by her side.

Especially sat on a 'plane

 

[Lionsden]

She's now started following that Garry Lineham dude

Maybe he can cure her of her Dreamy Joey trauma.

 

[curiouscat106]

Side note, is that Big Tezza’s house?! Looks like she’s abroad to me…
Also: polite warning for those who go on to view - she mentions bleeding in that full moon video

 

[coriander]

I’m honestly being so petty, but that ring is even uglier than I remember.
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Wow she looks like she's been through a lot....like physically and mentally fragile

 

[Jelly Bean]

Just because someone says they sold 700 tickets doesn’t mean they actually have…

Quite. I was going to say this is Donkey we're talking about. Who no doubt showed off terribly to Garry Garbage about how popular in Ireland he was as an entrepreneur and influencer.

 

[Callan]

It's like some Houdini 2.0 engagement.

stoppp I hated that this is genuinely disturbing and these people need therapy

I'm currently reading Tender is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica and it seems tamer than this shizz...

 

[Callan]

Does this picture exist anywhere? It’s nice to reminisce about times when we weren’t jump-scared by enormous teeth.
Although if I remember correctly there was quite a few jump-scares by Forky’s bare ass.

I believe it does in the older threads! I will take a peek through them, maybe I get lucky and find it. Well "lucky" i guess

 

[Callan]

Thought I’d check in on Gary to see if Lordon might be with him and I actually started typing Garbage Gary into IG. The nicknames you guys come up with are just too realistic

The brain fills in missing things and rearranges stuff to make it readable

 

[Coldfeet]

Yeah, imagine she’d made an effort, could have had some interesting (up to a point) content.

Easier to take your top off and spout shite about the universe I guess

When in doubt. BARE FLESH- sorted!!

 

[Imdiaz3]

She finally looks like she brushed her hair in those birthday pictures. I was getting tired of her dried and frizzy mane she’s so proud of.

 

[kittenseer]

So prim and proper our Nims.

 

[Coldfeet]

That does make sense. But it also shows she didn't need the money she earned there for actual living expenses if she was able to afford so many pairs.

Yep. They won't be giving shoes away.

 

[Callan]

Has she been to North America? I can't recall.

 

[Callan]

Yeah I was like, she has a TikTok? Can't imagine how dull and boring it must be.

 

[Orzosquarecaramel]

Yeah isn't it a couple on the beach? She gave it to him bc she thought it looked like them. Funny he would leave that up all this time. I wonder if Anna ever asked about it

Do we definitely know that Anna and Joe are still together? Surprising that a relationship started so soon after the end of Niomi and Joe’s would last so long!

 

[supercalifragilis]

She's had her lips done, hasn't she?

 

[Callan]

Yeah all the old comments are gone under that Tiktok and now 3 new ones, wow haha.