Niomi Smart #37 I'm NOT an Influencer...Get Me Out of Here!

[palmer]

They just celebrated his 28th birthday the other week! Right before their holiday.

No way! I’m 27, turning 28 this year and I assumed he was somewhere between 32-35

 

[Callan]

I think Niomi "relaxed" her plant based diet to spite Joey. Plus the whole plant based lifestyle was part of her Kate Middleton facade and "ethos" while she was with Joey. I don't think she created any 'recipe or what she eats in a day' content since her breakup.

Yeah Niomi relaxes her diet the way Forky relaxes his morals. She's a faker but he's definitely the catalyst to her acting like this now. I wish she would just eat whatever the hell she wants and stop throwing irrelevant terms. It's dishonest.

 

[emmmmm1111]

Wonder if we'll get a "VALENTINES DAY" official post. So excited ....
Nimwit <3 the forkster !

 

[Callan]

It would be hilarious if her V day gift is something #gifted since his Christmas shopping for his family was mostly gifted from what he posted. Maybe she's going to get the newest mop to #GETITDONE

 

[Sasa44]

It would be hilarious if her V day gift is something #gifted since his Christmas shopping for his family was mostly gifted from what he posted. Maybe she's going to get the newest mop to #GETITDONE

That “know your worth” story told us everything we need to know. She ain’t getting jackshit from anyone for valentines, not even noodle.

 

[lilamay]

Bradwagon is forever trying to jump on one or falling off the back of one

If he doesn’t arrange something for valentines, it’ll be peanut butter in his smoothies or underpants

That made me laugh

Me at Dimbob's excuse for not eating vegan:

In fact that's my reaction to virtually everything she says and does these days.

 

[kalechips]

Anna is going to Sri Lanka so I'm guessing that's where niomi's next vacation will be as well

 

[pipinGO]

Thank you Niomi for teaching me that I should have been eating langoustines, raw tuna and freaking pani puri as local foods.
Been here all my life and never knew about those delish mauritian foods

Ps: in her and Brad’s photos, I didn’t see one dish that locals eat on the regular by the way.

 

[Callan]

That made me laugh

Me at Dimbob's excuse for not eating vegan:

View attachment 1060958

In fact that's my reaction to virtually everything she says and does these days.

Well clearly Niomi is vegan except when she's not, duh.

Thank you Niomi for teaching me that I should have been eating langoustines, raw tuna and freaking pani puri as local foods.
Been here all my life and never knew about those delish mauritian foods

Ps: in her and Brad’s photos, I didn’t see one dish that locals eat on the regular by the way.

When this idiot and her fellow idiot not a boyfriend call something local - "belonging or relating to a particular area or neighborhood, typically exclusively so." I'm baffled by the connections.. I looked it up and " Though it is a street food in India, pani puris are not sold on the streets in Mauritius. You will not find this snack as easily as you would for gato piments. Here, they are mostly available in some specific Indian restaurants but you can find ready made ones in supermarkets." Maybe I'm wrong but gosh, when she tries to be an expert and you look that stuff up, it most often doesn't fully add up.

It's cooked on the premises not, local Nimbobs..

 

[pipinGO]

She is ‘restless’ when she ‘has to sit still’ because she has an exercise and eating disorder and feels ANXIOUS at the thought of sitting still because her mind is telling her to keep moving and burning calories. Most people with this disorder cannot do flights or car trips and if they do will compensate with hard exercise before or after.

Because the ‘long run’ before the flight wasn’t to tire her out (she just said they took nighttime flights anyway), it was to compensate for having to sit still.

Similar to their not eating much before their hike— saying it was because they didn’t want to be ‘bloated’ (what), when it was really because they has booked a big lunch so they were doing the compensation thing (eat hardly anything for the day before and after a big meal).

THIS!
And normally for people who do yoga and meditation as much as Nims does, ‘sitting still’ def isn’t a source of discomfort. Their minds tend to be calmer and settle down quicker than others. So I think something is def off with Nims.

 

[Callan]

THIS!
And normally for people who do yoga and meditation as much as Nims does, ‘sitting still’ def isn’t a source of discomfort. Their minds tend to be calmer and settle down quicker than others. So I think something is def off with Nims.

Certified Yoga teacher hates to sit still wow, yeah....

 

[Nitfey]

She could not find vegan food because a) it was not gifted b) she would need to do some basic reasearch like effing GOOGLE SEARCH and it was not shoved under her fake lazy ass on a silver plater c) carbs ugh, preferred chocolate almonds which were probably free at the hotel
Talking about local foods. She once raved about locally sourced avocado oil. Avocado...from UK. Yeah dumbass.
Her lack of brain is astonishing. I really believe she will self absorb and disappear being a black hole because of that emptiness inside her head.

 

[coriander]

Whenever she mentions that "she lived in Mumbai" I find it so cringe.

She knows that it's the only remotely interesting thing she's ever done in her entire life. 'Lived' = stayed in Soho House

Thank you Niomi for teaching me that I should have been eating langoustines, raw tuna and freaking pani puri as local foods.
Been here all my life and never knew about those delish mauritian foods

Ps: in her and Brad’s photos, I didn’t see one dish that locals eat on the regular by the way.

Omg this is absolutely hilarious. She's so dumb and uncultured, her and Forky are pahfect for each other

Also I just know that no matter what they ate, Forky would still prefer to have a baked potato and cheese

 

[Coldfeet]

Now we know that they'll keep Valentine's day private!You know what an introvert she is

 

[irvinelane]

Also I just know that no matter what they ate, Forky would still prefer to have a baked potato and cheese

You mean « baked potatoe »?

 

[Whowhowho2020]

At least she won’t make her mum take ‘sexy’ pictures of her this year

 

[AnnaMel]

Poor kiddo. Having such a exhausting working day right after coming back from holiday....White City House at 10 am.

 

[Rimada16]

Well clearly Niomi is vegan except when she's not, duh.





When this idiot and her fellow idiot not a boyfriend call something local - "belonging or relating to a particular area or neighborhood, typically exclusively so." I'm baffled by the connections.. I looked it up and " Though it is a street food in India, pani puris are not sold on the streets in Mauritius. You will not find this snack as easily as you would for gato piments. Here, they are mostly available in some specific Indian restaurants but you can find ready made ones in supermarkets." Maybe I'm wrong but gosh, when she tries to be an expert and you look that stuff up, it most often doesn't fully add up.

It's cooked on the premises not, local Nimbobs..

At least Forky googles his facts

 

[irvinelane]

Poor kiddo. Having such a exhausting working day right after coming back from holiday....White City House at 10 am.


View attachment 1061284

Happy Valentine’s Day Niomi! This gal has posted 3 stories about love to comfort herself

On another note, the Bradley syndrome is still going: not answering the question properly. People asked about SPF, she talked about cleanser

 

[oshare]

Happy Valentine Sweet Tattlers!

Anyway, I couldn't fall asleep last night because that one image of Niomi crab hugging Forky kept haunting me.
I really want to erase the image of the Dicky von Fork out of my brain
Why did she post that, spare our eyes.