SarahGard83
VIP Member
Taken from Twitter. WTAF? Apparently it's now been deleted as have the majority of negative comments on any of their social media
- Notice
TeaPotTattoo
Member
Since I learnt about this, I can't stop thinking about Hux and what he's been through. My two children were adopted and (we're in the UK though) and I've just got to get a few things off my chest.
The first thing isn't going to make me popular, but I think it's worth saying that children who have been abused and neglected in early childhood can behave in scary ways. I won't go into detail about my two, who were both older than Hux when my husband and I adopted them, but the first few years were literally about keeping everyone in the family safe. We made it through, absolutely no thanks to the useless child mental health services in this country, and thank goodness my kids are now young adults and doing well.
I have however known families where an adopted child had to be removed from the home (in the UK it's known as 'disruption') because they were too much of a danger to other members of the family. For those asking if MS would've 'rehomed' a birth child in this way, no child becomes a danger to themselves or others unless they have been traumatised by abuse and neglect. The child's behaviour is entirely about trauma.
I knew no different because I didn't have bio children, but I can only imagine the shock that a mother used to fairly well-behaved and loving children would experience having to parent a traumatised child. Some mothers can manage eventually. This one couldn't.
The second thing; I have never in all my life watched anything as vacuous, fake and disingenuous as as those videos by MS. Never heard of her before all this, but MY GOD! Is this typical content of mothers who make a commodity of their family life on social media? The sickly sweet proclamations, the "sponsored by" posts, the bragging, the packaging of life as a soap opera with headings, treating children like they are actors in a TV programme. We all present ourselves in chosen ways on different media, even in real life, but the deliberate commercialisation of your own family like this is unhealthy and narcissistic.
Which leads my to my final point. MS and her useless husband saw adoption as "beautiful" and a "crazy adventure". Adoption is none of those things. Adoption is loss, grief and trauma. Yes, wonderful things can come from adoption - my family is doing well these days - but those things are made in blood, sweat and tears. There's no place in the world of insta-moms' perfectly packaged lives for the dark business of creating a family when Trauma is an uninvited guest.
MS did not get this from the start to the end of her relationship with Huxley. She was obsessed with him "catching up" and with his "progress", like the only problem here was his delayed learning. In the video made with him when the poor chap was only seven weeks in placement, the stupid women didn't even grasp the fact that he couldn't speak English.
At one point I'm sure she said he was doing 7 hours a day, 6 days a week of the ABA programme, plus pre-school. That's a longer working week than most adults, and this is for a boy of what? 3 years, going into 4 years of age? A boy who couldn't speak English and who was operating at the age of about a 1 or 2 year old? And she wondered why he was having meltdowns!
She expected him to fit in from the start. Ignored all advice and took the family off for a holiday on a few weeks into placement, and then planned another one soon after. What this boy needed at the time, and would continue to need for years and years, was routine. Boring, repetitive routine. He needed plenty of one-on-one time with his new mum, difficult with three other kids, but not impossible with the others at school and a pro-active father.
As other people on here have said, she could've hired help. She should've hired help. Either to manage the house and help with the other children, or a nanny for Hux who was trained in trauma and /or autism.
But she was never going to do that, was she? How would she keep her followers and the money flowing in and the free jumpers from Amazon, if she wasn't playing the part of super mum? She had an ideal of who she was, who her family was, and what demographic they were aimed at. She was never going to change that for the benefit of a boy she and her husband had taken from another country, a boy disabled by brain damage, unable to speak the language, who didn't have a first clue what a family was, because he had never been in one before, or a home because he had never had one before.
She and her husband just threw money at Huxley, paying thousands of pounds to try and "fix" him, but what they wouldn't do is change one iota of their family lifestyle for him. And that is unforgivable.
Every video where she talks about Huxley, how she would never give him up, how she wouldn't change him for the world, how all bonded to him they all were, all lies. Lies, lies, lies.
She couldve started being real when the reality of adopting a neglected child with special needs got real, but instead she kept crapping out fairytales.
And the addition of a new baby, a fifth child, when she didn't have the time to start with, or the flexibility, to meet Huxley's needs? MS wanted a new baby, so MS had a new baby, and damn everyone else. Mother Of Five! How great that would look to everyone on social media? How amazing would she look? WHAT A SUPER MUM!
But the most telling thing of all? When Huxley was 're-homed' she just kept churning out her idiotic, vacuous rubbish. She didn't honour Huxley or her family by taking time away from the videos. She couldn't let the perfect image of herself or her family go, or risk losing money. That is the most sickening behaviour and shows her to be a narcissist at best and a psychopath at worst.
This boy is better off away from these moronic, self-absorbed, shallow, egotistical, monsters.
The first thing isn't going to make me popular, but I think it's worth saying that children who have been abused and neglected in early childhood can behave in scary ways. I won't go into detail about my two, who were both older than Hux when my husband and I adopted them, but the first few years were literally about keeping everyone in the family safe. We made it through, absolutely no thanks to the useless child mental health services in this country, and thank goodness my kids are now young adults and doing well.
I have however known families where an adopted child had to be removed from the home (in the UK it's known as 'disruption') because they were too much of a danger to other members of the family. For those asking if MS would've 'rehomed' a birth child in this way, no child becomes a danger to themselves or others unless they have been traumatised by abuse and neglect. The child's behaviour is entirely about trauma.
I knew no different because I didn't have bio children, but I can only imagine the shock that a mother used to fairly well-behaved and loving children would experience having to parent a traumatised child. Some mothers can manage eventually. This one couldn't.
The second thing; I have never in all my life watched anything as vacuous, fake and disingenuous as as those videos by MS. Never heard of her before all this, but MY GOD! Is this typical content of mothers who make a commodity of their family life on social media? The sickly sweet proclamations, the "sponsored by" posts, the bragging, the packaging of life as a soap opera with headings, treating children like they are actors in a TV programme. We all present ourselves in chosen ways on different media, even in real life, but the deliberate commercialisation of your own family like this is unhealthy and narcissistic.
Which leads my to my final point. MS and her useless husband saw adoption as "beautiful" and a "crazy adventure". Adoption is none of those things. Adoption is loss, grief and trauma. Yes, wonderful things can come from adoption - my family is doing well these days - but those things are made in blood, sweat and tears. There's no place in the world of insta-moms' perfectly packaged lives for the dark business of creating a family when Trauma is an uninvited guest.
MS did not get this from the start to the end of her relationship with Huxley. She was obsessed with him "catching up" and with his "progress", like the only problem here was his delayed learning. In the video made with him when the poor chap was only seven weeks in placement, the stupid women didn't even grasp the fact that he couldn't speak English.
At one point I'm sure she said he was doing 7 hours a day, 6 days a week of the ABA programme, plus pre-school. That's a longer working week than most adults, and this is for a boy of what? 3 years, going into 4 years of age? A boy who couldn't speak English and who was operating at the age of about a 1 or 2 year old? And she wondered why he was having meltdowns!
She expected him to fit in from the start. Ignored all advice and took the family off for a holiday on a few weeks into placement, and then planned another one soon after. What this boy needed at the time, and would continue to need for years and years, was routine. Boring, repetitive routine. He needed plenty of one-on-one time with his new mum, difficult with three other kids, but not impossible with the others at school and a pro-active father.
As other people on here have said, she could've hired help. She should've hired help. Either to manage the house and help with the other children, or a nanny for Hux who was trained in trauma and /or autism.
But she was never going to do that, was she? How would she keep her followers and the money flowing in and the free jumpers from Amazon, if she wasn't playing the part of super mum? She had an ideal of who she was, who her family was, and what demographic they were aimed at. She was never going to change that for the benefit of a boy she and her husband had taken from another country, a boy disabled by brain damage, unable to speak the language, who didn't have a first clue what a family was, because he had never been in one before, or a home because he had never had one before.
She and her husband just threw money at Huxley, paying thousands of pounds to try and "fix" him, but what they wouldn't do is change one iota of their family lifestyle for him. And that is unforgivable.
Every video where she talks about Huxley, how she would never give him up, how she wouldn't change him for the world, how all bonded to him they all were, all lies. Lies, lies, lies.
She couldve started being real when the reality of adopting a neglected child with special needs got real, but instead she kept crapping out fairytales.
And the addition of a new baby, a fifth child, when she didn't have the time to start with, or the flexibility, to meet Huxley's needs? MS wanted a new baby, so MS had a new baby, and damn everyone else. Mother Of Five! How great that would look to everyone on social media? How amazing would she look? WHAT A SUPER MUM!
But the most telling thing of all? When Huxley was 're-homed' she just kept churning out her idiotic, vacuous rubbish. She didn't honour Huxley or her family by taking time away from the videos. She couldn't let the perfect image of herself or her family go, or risk losing money. That is the most sickening behaviour and shows her to be a narcissist at best and a psychopath at worst.
This boy is better off away from these moronic, self-absorbed, shallow, egotistical, monsters.
I’ve not watched in ages because I find the mother to be unbearable but WHATTTTT!? After all the faff they went through to get the little guy, they’ve given him up???
Okay so I just watched the update video, and I’m raging! That poor little boy has had the worst life so far, in care and then dragged to America away from everything he’s used to, and then just as he’s used to his new family he’s sent away again? My heart breaks for him. They 10000% would never have done that to a child that was their blood which makes me hope they NEVER adopt again.
and is it just me that felt the video was completely disingenuous?All the crying felt forced and faked.
Okay so I just watched the update video, and I’m raging! That poor little boy has had the worst life so far, in care and then dragged to America away from everything he’s used to, and then just as he’s used to his new family he’s sent away again? My heart breaks for him. They 10000% would never have done that to a child that was their blood which makes me hope they NEVER adopt again.
and is it just me that felt the video was completely disingenuous?All the crying felt forced and faked.
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To dear little Huxley. I shall really miss your endearing smile but I sincerely hope that you are in a better home. A home where you won't have your thumb taped up in duck tape, where you can eat your dinner with your shirt on because you might have made a mess. Quite frankly who gives a shit as long as you have enjoyed a really healthy meal. Someone that gives you a cuddle after a tantrum and says it's ok, I love you. Just be the best that you can be .You deserve to be happy.
Because adoption is not what you settle for because you can’t have biological kids.
poopypants
Active member
With respect, if you are not the parent of an autistic child yourself you have little idea of the day to day care involved with looking after an autistic pre schooler. It is very likely that your SiL is on her knees with exhaustion.
Mycuppatea
Well-known member
I have two children (whom I adopted as a toddler and a baby) and they both needed so much comfort. They both wanted snuggly bottle feeds until 6/7 and both have comfort objects even though they are teenagers and one is 17. They both feel crippling separation anxiety. My 17 year old will refuse to leave my side on a walk when anxiety is high because of the belief that I will run away. Both of them slept in our bed every night but from around the age of 10 we started weaning them off, so now they each sleep with me when their dad is away (three nights a week). I think children who experience trauma and loss need so much patience, so much comfort, so much nurturing, so much tenderness. My two have grown do much in confidence, and manage well even if this doesn't sound like it, and I'm sure it is because every need for comfort and self soothing has always been offered. I feel so sad for this little boy and his taped up hands.
I’ve yet to watch the video as I don’t want to wake my hubby up but I will watch it whenever he wakes. I’ve been following some of the story on twitter during the night as I haven’t been able to sleep.
I just cannot understand how anyone could do that to a child. I totally appreciate that some parents have to put their biological child up for adoption for various reasons but who the hell decides to adopt a child and then put them up for adoption. I believe they were also considering adopting another child less than a year ago. This woman and her husband used this child and paraded him around on YouTube and Instagram. They used his adoption story for financial gain. I also believe there was a gofundme set up for the adoption and some other things.
I just cannot understand how anyone could do that to a child. I totally appreciate that some parents have to put their biological child up for adoption for various reasons but who the hell decides to adopt a child and then put them up for adoption. I believe they were also considering adopting another child less than a year ago. This woman and her husband used this child and paraded him around on YouTube and Instagram. They used his adoption story for financial gain. I also believe there was a gofundme set up for the adoption and some other things.
they seem to keep saying the medical companies and care companies suggested a move would be better for him. I don’t know what’s gone one, but to put him for adoption just seems so strange. Adopting an international child with obvious special needs with that many children anyway, to then get pregnant straight away was madness. A Newborn baby when you’re trying to settle a terrified non verbal child from adoption seems crazy. Huxley needed that 1:1. Poor boy.
peacelily7
Member
i'm autistic. this shit is scary.
it's been all over the autistic community in both public and private groups. being so close to the death of Alejandro Ripley, and the abuse of teenage autistic siblings in queensland australia, it's a really hard thing to come to terms with. the fact that not only do these things happen, but that people are excusing it and justifying it with the 'autism is hard to parent' narrative. we aren't animals. we aren't objects. Huxley is a human being regardless of his verbal speech, stims, meltdowns. he deserved to be treated like a human being. the fact that this isn't abnormal anymore, that these discussions about autistic people are always so centred around how hard it is for the parents, hurts our community. especially on twitter, the conversation is still dominated by parents of autistic children. the world only sees how much of a burden we are. don't get me wrong, there are some great allies amongst those parents, but those are mostly individuals who make a point to LISTEN to the autistic experience, and the voices of autistic adults. the fact that people are JUSTIFYING this woman's right to just... dispose of... her autistic child... is awful. so many of us in biological families are made to feel like a burden. this takes it to a whole other level. we aren't pets. we aren't objects.
from what i can gather, she seemed to take personal offence to the fact that Huxley didn't display affection in the same ways as her neurotypical, bio children. of course he didn't ! that doesn't mean he is somehow incapable of love and attachment, and wouldn't be traumatised from being taken from his family of several years. autistic people show love differently. sometimes we don't show it on neurotypical terms at all but that doesn't mean we don't love, by any means. it seriously makes me question how much research this woman did at all into neurodiversity and how to parent... these kind of assumptions cause trauma.
it's been all over the autistic community in both public and private groups. being so close to the death of Alejandro Ripley, and the abuse of teenage autistic siblings in queensland australia, it's a really hard thing to come to terms with. the fact that not only do these things happen, but that people are excusing it and justifying it with the 'autism is hard to parent' narrative. we aren't animals. we aren't objects. Huxley is a human being regardless of his verbal speech, stims, meltdowns. he deserved to be treated like a human being. the fact that this isn't abnormal anymore, that these discussions about autistic people are always so centred around how hard it is for the parents, hurts our community. especially on twitter, the conversation is still dominated by parents of autistic children. the world only sees how much of a burden we are. don't get me wrong, there are some great allies amongst those parents, but those are mostly individuals who make a point to LISTEN to the autistic experience, and the voices of autistic adults. the fact that people are JUSTIFYING this woman's right to just... dispose of... her autistic child... is awful. so many of us in biological families are made to feel like a burden. this takes it to a whole other level. we aren't pets. we aren't objects.
from what i can gather, she seemed to take personal offence to the fact that Huxley didn't display affection in the same ways as her neurotypical, bio children. of course he didn't ! that doesn't mean he is somehow incapable of love and attachment, and wouldn't be traumatised from being taken from his family of several years. autistic people show love differently. sometimes we don't show it on neurotypical terms at all but that doesn't mean we don't love, by any means. it seriously makes me question how much research this woman did at all into neurodiversity and how to parent... these kind of assumptions cause trauma.
I hope the little guy is happy in his new home. I have been following since he was first adopted. Set up an account here because I couldn't understand all the praise they were getting on the YouTube announcement last night.
In one of Mykas latest videos she was putting post-its around the house that said "you are a great mom". She can write out as many post-its as she wants but this is one of the worst things a mother could do.
In the video last night she said that the doctors recommended "something more" for him but I don't believe that second adoption is something that doctors recommend! If your child has issues you work through them as a family. Sure it might be tough, horrific even, but that's what being a parent is!
I also dont believe the RAD diagnosis they gave him... It's as if that's their excuse for rehoming. He seemed pretty attached at least to the dad and younger sister.
Saviour complex at its worst here. They only got the followers they have because of him.
In one of Mykas latest videos she was putting post-its around the house that said "you are a great mom". She can write out as many post-its as she wants but this is one of the worst things a mother could do.
In the video last night she said that the doctors recommended "something more" for him but I don't believe that second adoption is something that doctors recommend! If your child has issues you work through them as a family. Sure it might be tough, horrific even, but that's what being a parent is!
I also dont believe the RAD diagnosis they gave him... It's as if that's their excuse for rehoming. He seemed pretty attached at least to the dad and younger sister.
Saviour complex at its worst here. They only got the followers they have because of him.
NeedTeaSis
Active member
Myka is trash and never deserved that little boy. She adopted because it was the trend with other youtube families at the time and she saw it for what she would get out of it, a story line and a butt load of views. He was her cash cow. She never even tried with Huxley. She never played with him, cuddled with him or even seemed the least bit invested in his needs. Even with that being said, I'd never in a million years imagine that she'd sink this low and ultimately cause him more trauma. They seem to chalk it up to him "not being what they expected". You don't know what you're getting with a biological child either, yet she'd never toss one of her little blonde kids away like a piece of garbage. Her and her no-balls husband deserve to rot in hell for this.
Doohickey78
Chatty Member
Sh*t!
Followed her for a while but found her pretty fake. I knew the child had some developmental problems but Christ...would she have given him up if it was her own flesh and blood?!
Followed her for a while but found her pretty fake. I knew the child had some developmental problems but Christ...would she have given him up if it was her own flesh and blood?!
PinkBogeyBreath
Chatty Member
I reckon it was less their choice and whatever the equivalent of social services is where they are have got involved and removed him. Then they present it online as it being a choice they’ve made because that’s better PR wise than “we treated him badly and he was removed”.
I mean, if they tape his little hands like that to stop him comforting himself and put it online for anyone to see, what was happening behind closed doors?
I mean, if they tape his little hands like that to stop him comforting himself and put it online for anyone to see, what was happening behind closed doors?
SarahGard83
VIP Member
It's disgusting. I can't believe the amount of praise she's getting on Instagram from people calling her an amazing mother for making such a difficult decision. She's basically just binned off her own child!
Lots of fake tears on that video. Raising your voice a few octaves isn’t enough. Maybe she should have kept an onion beside her as well. Like a previous poster said, would she have given up a biological child this easily ? We won’t talk about it cos we need to protect Huxley - no you need to protect yourselves.
To those trying to excuse this by saying he may have done something terrible or had depraved proclivities since before being adopted (which were covered up by the officials in China), you are aware he was still very young when adopted. Not four. Not fourteen. Not to say trauma can't be established in babies and infants, but the idea he was already some kind of secret deviant or bad guy is just horrible.