Mumsnet #38 imagine spending £100 on a notebook and writing 'bleach arsehole' in it

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All you big-norked women, just be grateful you still have such hefty bosoms! I lost mine in a fire!

(actually lost them to cancer 2 years ago but I was a HH before that and do NOT miss those!!)
 
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All you big-norked women, just be grateful you still have such hefty bosoms! I lost mine in a fire!

(actually lost them to cancer 2 years ago but I was a HH before that and do NOT miss those!!)
Cancer is a bastard and I'm glad you've kicked the malevolent little duck into touch. Boobs are overrated anyway. Wishing you a happy and healthy life going forward 💐
 
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Sod being a DR ive always thought I'd be a good Duchess or Viscountess (hence the username).
Yes I'm watching Bridgerton and Yes may feminism shoot me down.
 
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I am enjoying them losing their tiny minds over the titles. A lot of them would have a fit if they saw the titles and how you need to refer to different Judges in my work 😂
 
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Um, I don’t use my Dr at all outside my professional life, apart from a failed attempt to get a higher credit limit on my credit card. It’s embarrassing and I’m also always vaguely worried someone will come and find me when someone collapses. It’s a bit like those people who get some random honour and then start signing off all the emails ‘Joe Bloggs OBE’.
I work with a few Drs (PhD) and admittedly I don't know if many of them do use it outside work. I do however think they should all be very proud of their titles and I wouldn't blame them one bit if they did use them out and about. I work in a profession where we all sign things with a big string of letters after our names. I'm supposed to be working toward another 7 letters and I kind of can't be arsed - so I'd definitely never get a PhD with my lazy attitude to out of work hours academic work! It would be very weird if I used those letters day to day though and I would also think I was a knob.
 
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Sod being a DR ive always thought I'd be a good Duchess or Viscountess (hence the username).
Yes I'm watching Bridgerton and Yes may feminism shoot me down.
Years ago, when my daughter was about 12, she signed up to get information leaflets for a regular craft show (fat lot of use, as we were on holiday so not likely to be going to that fair again).
She suddenly realised she could call herself anything...
She's got her own baby and home now and we're still getting these leaflets sent to Lady Florentine's Daughter 👑
 
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Same here.

I immediately adopted the maxim "What God's forgotten, stuff with cotton." (It was from a Doris Day film - I forget which. I saw it over half a century ago)
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Big pants are where it’s at - that was another stupid thing about yoof - g-strings ffs. These days unless they’re big enough to sail a galleon laden with Spanish gold across the Atlantic, I’m oot.

I'm with you there @50degreesnorth. - I've tried thongs (many years ago) and found them uncomfortable, unhygienic and unspeakably sordid - went back to Big Knickers*. A colleague who always wore thongs kept banging on about how freeing they were and you also got no visible pantie line. I di point out to her that when your drawers stretch from you knee to your armpits you don't get visible pantie line either.

*Ironically, in view of your post, autocarrot tried to change "knickers" to "knockers", but I caught it in time.
---

Not just French - lots of English D'Eaths and D'Aeths. I think it's Middle English but I wouldn't put money on it.
Funnily enough boots is discussing thongs and health
Is your thong causing more harm than good? Let’s find out if wearing a thong is your thing
Are you a thong devotee? We totally get why! Thongs are lightweight, they look great and they work wonders for avoiding a visible panty line (VPL) compared to bigger underwear styles like briefs or shorts.

But with their skimpier design, thongs have a reputation for being bad for your intimate health. So, it’s time to do some myth-busting and get to the bottom line of whether there are or aren’t any health risks that come with wearing your favourite style of underwear…

Thongs… friend or foe?


Whilst the thin strip of fabric on a thong may be sleek and discreet, some people think that these can lead to an increased risk of conditions like thrush, bacterial vaginosis (BV) and urinary tract infections (UTIs) like cystitis.

Contrary to popular belief, there’s no concrete evidence to suggest that wearing thongs is actually bad for your vulva and your health. A study from 2005* looked directly at string underwear and found that it doesn’t mess with the pH balance and the microclimate down there or even the friendly bacteria found on your skin. So, any worries about thongs causing chaos? Myth!

Another study from 2018** decided to tackle the question we’ve all wanted the answer to: do thongs lead to UTIs, BV or vaginal thrush? The study found no evidence to back up the idea that thongs can cause these issues, so that’s another myth debunked!

The key to comfort in underwear lies in selecting the right materials and practicing good hygiene habits. If you’re a thong enthusiast, don’t worry, you can strut your stuff without worry. Choosing the right underwear and caring for them can make all the difference.

Here are seven things to keep in mind when wearing a thong or any type of underwear.

Choose cotton


When it comes to underwear fabrics, cotton is queen. Cotton allows our skin to breathe, whereas manmade fibres don’t allow that. So, remember to stock up on cotton essentials to help keep a happy and healthy downstairs.

On the flip side, steer clear of synthetic materials like nylon. These fabrics trap moisture, creating a breeding ground for bacteria and increasing the likelihood of infections. Choose natural fibres when you can to keep things cool and comfortable.

Stay fresh


Just like you wouldn’t wear yesterday’s socks, the same goes for your underwear. Make it a habit to change into fresh pairs every day to maintain optimal hygiene and freshness. Your vulva will thank you.

Wash with care


When it’s laundry day, reach for a hypoallergenic soap. These are gentle yet effective and can clean your delicates, without causing any unwanted irritation. Treat your underwear with the same TLC you give to the rest of your wardrobe.

Go commando


Give your vulva some well-deserved freedom by going commando when you can. Letting your skin breathe while you catch those Zs can help prevent the build-up of moisture and keep things fresh 'til the morning. A loose pair of pyjama bottoms or a dress can allow some air flow.

Fit is everything


Remember, fit is everything when it comes to underwear. Avoid overly tight styles that can restrict airflow and cause discomfort. Instead, choose snug yet breathable options that move with your body.

Choosing underwear for workouts


When breaking a sweat, choose moisture-wicking fabrics like polyester to keep you dry and comfortable during your workouts. Look out for seamless styles to minimise chafing and irritation, allowing you to focus on crushing those fitness goals.

Replace every year (if you can afford to)


If it’s within your budget, don’t forget to refresh your underwear annually. Over time, elastic can lose its stretch and fabrics can lose their quality, compromising both comfort and hygiene. Treat yourself to some new underwear every year for a wardrobe refresh. Your down there deserves some self-care too.

So, there you have it, the truth behind thongs. With a few simple tips, you can wear your thongs with confidence, knowing you’re taking care of your intimate health along the way. Say goodbye to myths and hello to comfort, because when it comes to thongs, it’s all about finding the perfect balance between style and wellbeing.

*Runeman B, Rybo G, Forsgren-Brusk U, Larkö O, Larsson P, Faergemann J. The vulvar skin microenvironment: impact of tight-fitting underwear on microclimate, pH and microflora. Acta Derm Venereol. 2005;85(2):118-22

**Hamlin, Alyssa MD; Sheeder, Jeanelle MD; Muffly, Tyler MD. Brief vs Thong Hygiene in Obstetrics and Gynecology (B-THONG): A Survey Study [1J]. Obstetrics & Gynecology 131():p 108S, May 2018
 
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My brother is a doctor and was on a flight when a medical emergency occurred. Someone else volunteered to help before him and he was relieved to be able to continue on with his film and g&t.
A friend is married to a (now retired) consultant paediatrician. He's always a bit worried about being called on at an emergency though he's really well informed on nappy rash.
 
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10/10 to the pregnancy anxiety troll. I’m banned from Mumsnet but I have to agree that the woman who thinks that metal shards she may or may not have eaten (she doesn’t know) will travel across the placenta and hurt her baby needs to cop on to herself
 
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10/10 to the pregnancy anxiety troll. I’m banned from Mumsnet but I have to agree that the woman who thinks that metal shards she may or may not have eaten (she doesn’t know) will travel across the placenta and hurt her baby needs to cop on to herself
Oh is this the same person who posted go ask if rhubarb was safe to eat while pregnant?!
There was also someone who posted to say they had swallowed some corsodyl mouthwash and did they need to go to A&E to get checked?
 
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A poster’s 16yo has been denied leave from their 8 hour contract weekly job to go on holiday.
One MNetter has replied to warn them that if they quit, as others have advised, this would leave a gap in their CV
🤣🤣🤣🤣
 
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Reactions: 23
Funnily enough boots is discussing thongs and health
Is your thong causing more harm than good? Let’s find out if wearing a thong is your thing
Are you a thong devotee? We totally get why! Thongs are lightweight, they look great and they work wonders for avoiding a visible panty line (VPL) compared to bigger underwear styles like briefs or shorts.

But with their skimpier design, thongs have a reputation for being bad for your intimate health. So, it’s time to do some myth-busting and get to the bottom line of whether there are or aren’t any health risks that come with wearing your favourite style of underwear…

Thongs… friend or foe?

Whilst the thin strip of fabric on a thong may be sleek and discreet, some people think that these can lead to an increased risk of conditions like thrush, bacterial vaginosis (BV) and urinary tract infections (UTIs) like cystitis.

Contrary to popular belief, there’s no concrete evidence to suggest that wearing thongs is actually bad for your vulva and your health. A study from 2005* looked directly at string underwear and found that it doesn’t mess with the pH balance and the microclimate down there or even the friendly bacteria found on your skin. So, any worries about thongs causing chaos? Myth!

Another study from 2018** decided to tackle the question we’ve all wanted the answer to: do thongs lead to UTIs, BV or vaginal thrush? The study found no evidence to back up the idea that thongs can cause these issues, so that’s another myth debunked!

The key to comfort in underwear lies in selecting the right materials and practicing good hygiene habits. If you’re a thong enthusiast, don’t worry, you can strut your stuff without worry. Choosing the right underwear and caring for them can make all the difference.

Here are seven things to keep in mind when wearing a thong or any type of underwear.

Choose cotton

When it comes to underwear fabrics, cotton is queen. Cotton allows our skin to breathe, whereas manmade fibres don’t allow that. So, remember to stock up on cotton essentials to help keep a happy and healthy downstairs.

On the flip side, steer clear of synthetic materials like nylon. These fabrics trap moisture, creating a breeding ground for bacteria and increasing the likelihood of infections. Choose natural fibres when you can to keep things cool and comfortable.

Stay fresh

Just like you wouldn’t wear yesterday’s socks, the same goes for your underwear. Make it a habit to change into fresh pairs every day to maintain optimal hygiene and freshness. Your vulva will thank you.

Wash with care

When it’s laundry day, reach for a hypoallergenic soap. These are gentle yet effective and can clean your delicates, without causing any unwanted irritation. Treat your underwear with the same TLC you give to the rest of your wardrobe.

Go commando

Give your vulva some well-deserved freedom by going commando when you can. Letting your skin breathe while you catch those Zs can help prevent the build-up of moisture and keep things fresh 'til the morning. A loose pair of pyjama bottoms or a dress can allow some air flow.

Fit is everything

Remember, fit is everything when it comes to underwear. Avoid overly tight styles that can restrict airflow and cause discomfort. Instead, choose snug yet breathable options that move with your body.

Choosing underwear for workouts

When breaking a sweat, choose moisture-wicking fabrics like polyester to keep you dry and comfortable during your workouts. Look out for seamless styles to minimise chafing and irritation, allowing you to focus on crushing those fitness goals.

Replace every year (if you can afford to)

If it’s within your budget, don’t forget to refresh your underwear annually. Over time, elastic can lose its stretch and fabrics can lose their quality, compromising both comfort and hygiene. Treat yourself to some new underwear every year for a wardrobe refresh. Your down there deserves some self-care too.

So, there you have it, the truth behind thongs. With a few simple tips, you can wear your thongs with confidence, knowing you’re taking care of your intimate health along the way. Say goodbye to myths and hello to comfort, because when it comes to thongs, it’s all about finding the perfect balance between style and wellbeing.

*Runeman B, Rybo G, Forsgren-Brusk U, Larkö O, Larsson P, Faergemann J. The vulvar skin microenvironment: impact of tight-fitting underwear on microclimate, pH and microflora. Acta Derm Venereol. 2005;85(2):118-22

**Hamlin, Alyssa MD; Sheeder, Jeanelle MD; Muffly, Tyler MD. Brief vs Thong Hygiene in Obstetrics and Gynecology (B-THONG): A Survey Study [1J]. Obstetrics & Gynecology 131():p 108S, May 2018
If it’s within your budget, don’t forget to refresh your underwear annually.

<Hides sagging knickers which have graced the underwear drawer for about two decades>
---
A friend is married to a (now retired) consultant paediatrician. He's always a bit worried about being called on at an emergency though he's really well informed on nappy rash.
I was a Speech and Language Therapist.

My secret dream was to go to the theatre and to everyone's consternation the play is inexplicably stopped . . . . and then the call goes out . . . "IS THERE A SPEECH AND LANGUAGE THERAPIST SPECIALISING IN VOICE IN THE HOUSE?"

I would modestly stand up. "I am a Speech and etc specialising in voice" and would walk with a capable but humble demeanour towards the stage. (Obviously everybody claps). I perform my SLT magic on the stricken thespian. The star is therap-ed. The play continues. The show goes on. I am carried shoulder high back to my seat to tumultuous applause. I never have to pay for a theatre ticket again worldwide, such is their gratitude.

It was going to be my moment to shine, but sadly it never happened.
 
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A poster’s 16yo has been denied leave from their 8 hour contract weekly job to go on holiday.
One MNetter has replied to warn them that if they quit, as others have advised, this would leave a gap in their CV
🤣🤣🤣🤣
They will never work again - they will be ruined (or they could list their school to cover those dates)
 
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A poster’s 16yo has been denied leave from their 8 hour contract weekly job to go on holiday.
One MNetter has replied to warn them that if they quit, as others have advised, this would leave a gap in their CV
🤣🤣🤣🤣
They are so weird about gaps on a CV! Obviously there are times when it can look bad but they take it to a mad extreme and seem to think it's illegal not to put every job you've ever had on there, even if you did it for a week 15 years ago. I once mentioned that no, I don't include the irrelevant job I did for a month ten years ago after being made redundant that has nothing to do with my industry and the shrieking about how I was LYING and I was sure to get found out and fired and HOW COULD I LIVE WITH MYSELF LYING and all that.
 
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A SLT never being called upon at theatre? Does this mean my time might also never come?

I’d be walking through JFK laden down with duty-free and wearing 4 different perfumes when a call would come over the tannoy “We have an emergency in ATC, is there anyone out there who can debug code?”. I’d solemnly push aside my Taco Bell, nod to the manager and make my way to the control tower. Everyone would clap (they really would - watch any US film, they’ll all clap if someone farts) and once again planes would land safely. Ish.
 
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They are so weird about gaps on a CV! Obviously there are times when it can look bad but they take it to a mad extreme and seem to think it's illegal not to put every job you've ever had on there, even if you did it for a week 15 years ago. I once mentioned that no, I don't include the irrelevant job I did for a month ten years ago after being made redundant that has nothing to do with my industry and the shrieking about how I was LYING and I was sure to get found out and fired and HOW COULD I LIVE WITH MYSELF LYING and all that.
They are all so weird about work generally.

I’ve worked in many offices, some of them completely dysfunctional, but thank duck I’ve never run into any of the MN “this is how work works and ANYTHING ELSE IS WRONG” brigade.
 
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If it’s within your budget, don’t forget to refresh your underwear annually.

It's just occurred to me that "refresh" could be a euphemism for "wash". Or even "squirt a bit of deodorant over them".

I wash mine every time I wear them, and so feel incredibly virtuous compared to those grimy trollops who stick to the annual rinse through recommended bu the country's leading pharmacists.
 
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