Miscarriage/Baby Loss

[Vivian124]

Hello! I had a loss at 12 weeks in May and have been ttc ever since. I monitor ovulation each month but so far (this is my 3rd cycle since loss) I have zero ovulation. My gp isn't concerned and says it's my body still not back to normal. But it's incredibly saddening and frustrating because we want to try again. Has this ever happened anyone else?

Careful what you wish for! I got my peak ovulation on cd18, 5 days ago, and it hasn't come down since!!!! That has never happened before. It's alarmingly high on the easy@home strips and 48 hrs after getting the static smiley on the clear blue I tested again yesterday and it was still static smiley!!! Not one bit of cervical mucus though, which I would've always had before the loss in May my hormones are still all over the place for sure. I usually peak day 14 so had written this cycle off when I didn't get any peak only for it to arrive cd18 and still rising cd23

 

[Mbouzer]

Im going through my third miscarriage in a row, this one was detected at my 12 week scan, babies heart stopped beating at 10 weeks me and my husband were in total disbelief. Im absolutely petrified this one will be the furthest along out of my three miscarriages. Im going into hospital for medical management on Monday as nothing is happening naturally and the thought of having my baby still inside me lifeless is sending me mental, I feel sick with dread what I'm going to endure. Im exhausted, three losses in the past 10 months?!. Im absolutely devastated, this one hurt just that little bit more as I really thought this was the one this time Im not coping well and just bursting into breathless sobs constantly, my sister is pregnant I was due a month before her, we were meant to be sharing this journey together and now mine is being ripped away, I almost feel embarrassed I’ve been walking around thinking I’m pregnant when all along my babies heart had stopped. They are referring me for tests for recurrent miscarriage but the thought of having to go through this again fills me with dread. I just don’t know what to do with myself my sadness is turning to anger, why me, what did I do to deserve this?! I also have a toddler and I feel like people think she should be lucky she already has one which I do but it doesn’t take the pain and yearning away to have another child.

Im so sorry for the rambling post I’m just so lost. I have my medical management tomorrow but Ive decided to do it in hospital as I’m worried being at home this time just because I’m further along. My last two miscarriages I managed at home but I was alot earlier. What should I expect with medical management and this gestation age? My husband will be will me at hospital, will I have to stay in? They are also going to send the fetus off for testing due to this being my third loss what do they all look for?

Thank you all x

 

[begaphobia]

Im going through my third miscarriage in a row, this one was detected at my 12 week scan, babies heart stopped beating at 10 weeks me and my husband were in total disbelief. Im absolutely petrified this one will be the furthest along out of my three miscarriages. Im going into hospital for medical management on Monday as nothing is happening naturally and the thought of having my baby still inside me lifeless is sending me mental, I feel sick with dread what I'm going to endure. Im exhausted, three losses in the past 10 months?!. Im absolutely devastated, this one hurt just that little bit more as I really thought this was the one this time Im not coping well and just bursting into breathless sobs constantly, my sister is pregnant I was due a month before her, we were meant to be sharing this journey together and now mine is being ripped away, I almost feel embarrassed I’ve been walking around thinking I’m pregnant when all along my babies heart had stopped. They are referring me for tests for recurrent miscarriage but the thought of having to go through this again fills me with dread. I just don’t know what to do with myself my sadness is turning to anger, why me, what did I do to deserve this?! I also have a toddler and I feel like people think she should be lucky she already has one which I do but it doesn’t take the pain and yearning away to have another child.

Im so sorry for the rambling post I’m just so lost. I have my medical management tomorrow but Ive decided to do it in hospital as I’m worried being at home this time just because I’m further along. My last two miscarriages I managed at home but I was alot earlier. What should I expect with medical management and this gestation age? My husband will be will me at hospital, will I have to stay in? They are also going to send the fetus off for testing due to this being my third loss what do they all look for?

Thank you all x

I’m so terribly sorry for your losses MBouzer. I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now. I MC’d at home so I can’t help with the medical side of things but hopefully someone here can provide you with some information about that. Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever you want to feel xx

 

[Gossipgirl79]

Im going through my third miscarriage in a row, this one was detected at my 12 week scan, babies heart stopped beating at 10 weeks me and my husband were in total disbelief. Im absolutely petrified this one will be the furthest along out of my three miscarriages. Im going into hospital for medical management on Monday as nothing is happening naturally and the thought of having my baby still inside me lifeless is sending me mental, I feel sick with dread what I'm going to endure. Im exhausted, three losses in the past 10 months?!. Im absolutely devastated, this one hurt just that little bit more as I really thought this was the one this time Im not coping well and just bursting into breathless sobs constantly, my sister is pregnant I was due a month before her, we were meant to be sharing this journey together and now mine is being ripped away, I almost feel embarrassed I’ve been walking around thinking I’m pregnant when all along my babies heart had stopped. They are referring me for tests for recurrent miscarriage but the thought of having to go through this again fills me with dread. I just don’t know what to do with myself my sadness is turning to anger, why me, what did I do to deserve this?! I also have a toddler and I feel like people think she should be lucky she already has one which I do but it doesn’t take the pain and yearning away to have another child.

Im so sorry for the rambling post I’m just so lost. I have my medical management tomorrow but Ive decided to do it in hospital as I’m worried being at home this time just because I’m further along. My last two miscarriages I managed at home but I was alot earlier. What should I expect with medical management and this gestation age? My husband will be will me at hospital, will I have to stay in? They are also going to send the fetus off for testing due to this being my third loss what do they all look for?

Thank you all x

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’ve had 3 mcs, the second was a mmc later on, and it is awful. Are you having an MVA or D&C? I had an MVA. They’ll test for chromosomal abnormalities.

 

[Mbouzer]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’ve had 3 mcs, the second was a mmc later on, and it is awful. Are you having an MVA or D&C? I had an MVA. They’ll test for chromosomal abnormalities.

I’m sorry to hear you’ve suffered the same. Neither, they suggested the tablet option but I will be in hospital when taking them and miscarrying, I just hope everything comes away properly

 

[Gossipgirl79]

I’m sorry to hear you’ve suffered the same. Neither, they suggested the tablet option but I will be in hospital when taking them and miscarrying, I just hope everything comes away properly

Ohhh I see. I tried the tablets twice and they didn’t work for me so that’s when they suggested the MVA, but that’s rare, so hopefully it goes as well as it can for you.

 

[Mbouzer]

Ohhh I see. I tried the tablets twice and they didn’t work for me so that’s when they suggested the MVA, but that’s rare, so hopefully it goes as well as it can for you.

Bless you, thank you. I hope they work I just want it all over with x

 

[Vivian124]

Im going through my third miscarriage in a row, this one was detected at my 12 week scan, babies heart stopped beating at 10 weeks me and my husband were in total disbelief. Im absolutely petrified this one will be the furthest along out of my three miscarriages. Im going into hospital for medical management on Monday as nothing is happening naturally and the thought of having my baby still inside me lifeless is sending me mental, I feel sick with dread what I'm going to endure. Im exhausted, three losses in the past 10 months?!. Im absolutely devastated, this one hurt just that little bit more as I really thought this was the one this time Im not coping well and just bursting into breathless sobs constantly, my sister is pregnant I was due a month before her, we were meant to be sharing this journey together and now mine is being ripped away, I almost feel embarrassed I’ve been walking around thinking I’m pregnant when all along my babies heart had stopped. They are referring me for tests for recurrent miscarriage but the thought of having to go through this again fills me with dread. I just don’t know what to do with myself my sadness is turning to anger, why me, what did I do to deserve this?! I also have a toddler and I feel like people think she should be lucky she already has one which I do but it doesn’t take the pain and yearning away to have another child.

Im so sorry for the rambling post I’m just so lost. I have my medical management tomorrow but Ive decided to do it in hospital as I’m worried being at home this time just because I’m further along. My last two miscarriages I managed at home but I was alot earlier. What should I expect with medical management and this gestation age? My husband will be will me at hospital, will I have to stay in? They are also going to send the fetus off for testing due to this being my third loss what do they all look for?

Thank you all x

I'm so so sorry you're going

Im going through my third miscarriage in a row, this one was detected at my 12 week scan, babies heart stopped beating at 10 weeks me and my husband were in total disbelief. Im absolutely petrified this one will be the furthest along out of my three miscarriages. Im going into hospital for medical management on Monday as nothing is happening naturally and the thought of having my baby still inside me lifeless is sending me mental, I feel sick with dread what I'm going to endure. Im exhausted, three losses in the past 10 months?!. Im absolutely devastated, this one hurt just that little bit more as I really thought this was the one this time Im not coping well and just bursting into breathless sobs constantly, my sister is pregnant I was due a month before her, we were meant to be sharing this journey together and now mine is being ripped away, I almost feel embarrassed I’ve been walking around thinking I’m pregnant when all along my babies heart had stopped. They are referring me for tests for recurrent miscarriage but the thought of having to go through this again fills me with dread. I just don’t know what to do with myself my sadness is turning to anger, why me, what did I do to deserve this?! I also have a toddler and I feel like people think she should be lucky she already has one which I do but it doesn’t take the pain and yearning away to have another child.

Im so sorry for the rambling post I’m just so lost. I have my medical management tomorrow but Ive decided to do it in hospital as I’m worried being at home this time just because I’m further along. My last two miscarriages I managed at home but I was alot earlier. What should I expect with medical management and this gestation age? My husband will be will me at hospital, will I have to stay in? They are also going to send the fetus off for testing due to this being my third loss what do they all look for?

Thank you all x

Firstly I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had a loss at 12 weeks, after 10 wks it has to be medically managed in the hospital. I was kept in and wasn't expecting to be.

Spoiler: Minor complications with procedure

the foetus passed after 2 tablets but the placenta didn't and I ended up going to theatre to remove it and I was given an epidural. I was traumatised because I didn't think it would end this way, as if the whole thing isn't upsetting enough, but I learned afterwards that this can be a common occurrence. Just so you know in case it happens you. I would've preferred to have known beforehand that this might happen.

 

[Mbouzer]

I'm so so sorry you're going

Firstly I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had a loss at 12 weeks, after 10 wks it has to be medically managed in the hospital. I was kept in and wasn't expecting to be.

Spoiler: Minor complications with procedure

the foetus passed after 2 tablets but the placenta didn't and I ended up going to theatre to remove it and I was given an epidural. I was traumatised because I didn't think it would end this way, as if the whole thing isn't upsetting enough, but I learned afterwards that this can be a common occurrence. Just so you know in case it happens you. I would've preferred to have known beforehand that this might happen.

Im so sorry to hear you went through that I took one tablet today and I’m due in tomorrow to take the rest but I’ve already started bleeding tonight, I think my body was nearly ready, I just hope I can hold on till tomorrow as I dont want to be at home this time when it happens x

 

[Mbouzer]

I had my medical management today. Needed two doses of the tablets, the second dose worked, pains were similar to early labour, managed without pain medication and looks like I passed everything. I got to say goodbye to baby too and I’m glad that although it was awful, it went as “well” as it possibly could. Now just need to get my head together and try and process everything as best I can.

 

[Vivian124]

I had my medical management today. Needed two doses of the tablets, the second dose worked, pains were similar to early labour, managed without pain medication and looks like I passed everything. I got to say goodbye to baby too and I’m glad that although it was awful, it went as “well” as it possibly could. Now just need to get my head together and try and process everything as best I can.

You poor girl my heart is broken for you, be very very kind to yourself, eat and drink what you like, don't go to work if you don't feel like it and maybe look into grievance counseling. I'm glad it went as quickly as it did for you. I listen to "better days are coming" by Dermot Kennedy once a day but only started lately. Maybe in time it might give you hope. Xx

 

[Mbouzer]

You poor girl my heart is broken for you, be very very kind to yourself, eat and drink what you like, don't go to work if you don't feel like it and maybe look into grievance counseling. I'm glad it went as quickly as it did for you. I listen to "better days are coming" by Dermot Kennedy once a day but only started lately. Maybe in time it might give you hope. Xx

Thank you lovely and wow thats so crazy you say that because that has been my song throughout this whole thing and my previous losses. I listen to it and cry and sing along, it gives me hope x

 

[watermelon sugar]

@Mbouzer sending you lot’s of love, you’ve been very brave. Take it day by day, and be easy on yourself. Thinking of you 🤍

 

[begaphobia]

You poor girl my heart is broken for you, be very very kind to yourself, eat and drink what you like, don't go to work if you don't feel like it and maybe look into grievance counseling. I'm glad it went as quickly as it did for you. I listen to "better days are coming" by Dermot Kennedy once a day but only started lately. Maybe in time it might give you hope. Xx

“Better Days” was released when I had my MC and it broke my heart when I heard it on the radio but it brought me comfort after time x

I had my medical management today. Needed two doses of the tablets, the second dose worked, pains were similar to early labour, managed without pain medication and looks like I passed everything. I got to say goodbye to baby too and I’m glad that although it was awful, it went as “well” as it possibly could. Now just need to get my head together and try and process everything as best I can.

There’s no nice way of saying “I’m glad it went well” in this scenario but as you say, I’m glad it went as well as it could. As others have said, be kind to yourself. Please check in here when you feel up to it and let us know how you are xx

 

[disillusionedbythegram]

Hi everyone, I was wondering if there’s a better space to discuss pregnancy after miscarriage? I don’t want to be insensitive by asking questions in here but can’t find another thread that would be appropriate.
Sending lots of love to you all

 

[calmyourritas]

Hi everyone, I was wondering if there’s a better space to discuss pregnancy after miscarriage? I don’t want to be insensitive by asking questions in here but can’t find another thread that would be appropriate.
Sending lots of love to you all

I would say just the general pregnancy thread is probably your best bet, you could always pop things in a spoiler on there so people don’t read if they don’t want to xx

 

[Gossipgirl79]

I would say just the general pregnancy thread is probably your best bet, you could always pop things in a spoiler on there so people don’t read if they don’t want to xx

That’s what I do, the pregnancy thread but spoiler if discussing loss etc, some people get a bit upset if it’s not covered.

 

[Tiktoklurker]

Hi, I just came across this thread and was hoping for some comfort / advice.

I recently had an early miscarriage at 8 weeks, only myself, my fiancé, a friend and his mother knew. The pregnancy was a shock, we weren’t trying as our wedding and festivities are coming up in 2023. (We’d probably try soon after)
Although, this baby wasn’t planned and it wasn’t the best timing I cannot help but feel so empty and upset.
My mother has passed away so no comfort from her but my fiancés mother has been so unhelpful and hurtful, stating that this baby would have been an inconvenience, it wasn’t really a pregnancy as it was such an early loss, I shouldn’t be feeling this way etc.
I know I will be better soon and maybe it wasn’t the right timing but I just don’t understand her comments!
Has anyone else had to deal with this sort of thing? I’m not sure how to approach it or to just ignore from now on in? I just wish my mother was here right now.

 

[Heyguysswipeup]

Hi, I just came across this thread and was hoping for some comfort / advice.

I recently had an early miscarriage at 8 weeks, only myself, my fiancé, a friend and his mother knew. The pregnancy was a shock, we weren’t trying as our wedding and festivities are coming up in 2023. (We’d probably try soon after)
Although, this baby wasn’t planned and it wasn’t the best timing I cannot help but feel so empty and upset.
My mother has passed away so no comfort from her but my fiancés mother has been so unhelpful and hurtful, stating that this baby would have been an inconvenience, it wasn’t really a pregnancy as it was such an early loss, I shouldn’t be feeling this way etc.
I know I will be better soon and maybe it wasn’t the right timing but I just don’t understand her comments!
Has anyone else had to deal with this sort of thing? I’m not sure how to approach it or to just ignore from now on in? I just wish my mother was here right now.

so sorry for your loss, people just don’t get it unless they have been through it themselves.. they think what they are saying is being helpful or trying to justify the situation but it makes us feel worse. I would try to ignore it or ask your partner to speak to her, there is no trying to justify this situation.. you are allowed to be sad and to grieve your loss without having people try and look at the positives of the situation. Talking about it and just giving it time is what helped me the most. Sending you loads of love

 

[shadowofdoubt]

Hi, I just came across this thread and was hoping for some comfort / advice.

I recently had an early miscarriage at 8 weeks, only myself, my fiancé, a friend and his mother knew. The pregnancy was a shock, we weren’t trying as our wedding and festivities are coming up in 2023. (We’d probably try soon after)
Although, this baby wasn’t planned and it wasn’t the best timing I cannot help but feel so empty and upset.
My mother has passed away so no comfort from her but my fiancés mother has been so unhelpful and hurtful, stating that this baby would have been an inconvenience, it wasn’t really a pregnancy as it was such an early loss, I shouldn’t be feeling this way etc.
I know I will be better soon and maybe it wasn’t the right timing but I just don’t understand her comments!
Has anyone else had to deal with this sort of thing? I’m not sure how to approach it or to just ignore from now on in? I just wish my mother was here right now.

Hey, I’m so sorry for your loss
I completely understand, people seem to think if it’s an early miscarriage it’s easier to deal with/less painful but that’s just not how it is. From the second you find out you’re pregnant everything changes, planned or not. It’s your body, your baby, your loss and your grief - never let anyone tell you how you should feel about any of them things. Her comments are really insensitive and hurtful, not something you should have to deal with at this time when you’re going through enough xx