Because she’s lazy and wants everything NOW!!
Lydia Millen #31 got flopitis, wants everything Sage Green, but Globy's nowhere to be seen
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She'll not be able to close the doors soon with all those layers on paint on it.Oh god shes painted the centre island pidgeon and is going to paint the white walls whiter
Don't give her good ideas!!
Ali's vlog a bit boring with the clothes, I do hope he really donates the stuff he isn't keeping. At least one of them has a heart, the other is a wicked witch....
Also felt sorry for him going to bed next to that giant schnoz, must be terrifying to see when you wake up in the morning.
She's copied Josie's UGG slippers!
It’s a massively overgrown bramble bush. She really should put some energy into tidying up the garden she already has if she wants everything to be so aesthetically pleasing.Has she worn her walking boots to walk to the pub? Everyone else is in trainers! What a tit!
Has she checked that you can actually eat those berries on the bush? She says it's a blackberry bush but I'm not convinced.
She has red basil seeds, which she thinks will look lovely
So funny how she said she made a point to say she bought her Grandma on on her stories the other day, evidently not. The fact she accepted money off her Grandma for a bleeping thermomix says it allVlog Thursday 30th July 2020 - I Shouldn't Have Bought All Of This (Straight up you bought about 2% given it's a paid for integrated partnership. No need to lie to kick it).
- Her vlog game is far from strong but consistent. Good morningDressing gown
- It's Friday. She has a few loose ends to tie up before the weekend. She later says she had busy day but then corrects herself. Perhaps your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
- She didn't want to spoil the surprise in the last vlog. She's treating Cawwee to a hike pit stop of all the local pubs as Cawwee is moving closer. A pub crawl then. At least you won't be the only idiot in the village Lydia. Ali and his manager join them. They all genuinely look like they're having fun. This is because Lydia is at the back preoccupied with vlogging obvs. Side note - why the duck does Ali need a manager? I suppose searching for the perfect twig by yourself is hard work in itself.
- She begins to speak about Farfetch's philosophy. Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It’ll only take 10 seconds. Still way more time than was dedicated to Glóby (your own brand) though.
- She saw the Fendi bag in Josie's boot room, then said 'oh that's the bag I ordered yesterday'. You speak fluent tit Lydia. Apparently it's to replace her backpack, you know the one she bought last week, to store her cheese and pickle sandwiches in. Some people are has-beens. You Lydia are a never-was.
- She went for a walk in the Lake District. Did she? That's a long journey. I think she means Peak District. Do you ever wonder what life would be like Lydia, if you’d had enough oxygen at birth?
- It's now Sunday. She acknowledges she needs to clean the windows. It's been months, but those pesky window cleaners won't come inside during the pandemic. Hear me out girl. Could you not possibly clean them yourself? I know you’re not as stupid as you look. Nobody could be!
- We get to see up close the pigeon centre island. She's going to paint the walls next in Farrow and Ball's shade 'I give no fucks'.
- She goes outside to check on her bramble bushes. She orgasms over the berries as she'll be making jam in no time. Have you ever considered suing your brain Lydia for nonsupport?
- She's feeling chipper so she is putting on a lovely dress, to do some things around the house. On that note, let's play house. You be the door and I’ll slam you.
- She emphasises this is going to be her last summer haul. But after each item she literally says 'I'm going to order more' or 'I need to get another one'. Don’t get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?
- She asks 'let me know which one you would wear today?' I vote the cardboard box they came in. None of these are steamed obviously. She states she's a bad fashion blogger. She's going to put the code on screen as she never knows it off by heart. What do you actually find so difficult about memorising a few letters and numbers? Do you want to die stupid?
- She highlights they're both having a busy day. The next clip, she's writing in a Filofax to store all her seeds. This is now known as the Bible from herein, to refer back to when she is re-seeding. Oh an extra tab for salads. Any similarity between Lydia and a human is purely coincidental.
- She's new to cooking, so she just tells us exactly what it says on the thermomix. Don't feel bad Lydia. A lot of people have no talent.
- She bought her grandma a thermomix. Said grandma then bank transferred her back the money for said thermomix. No buying really involved then Lydia. Standard.
Man. She fugly. All self inflicted willingly so I don't feel like a witch for saying it. Totally ruined her natural beauty.
The Top Ten Downfalls in Lockdown Life (Where did it all go wrong? Well lemme tell you. If you want a successful career do not follow these. If you want to become a boss babe, read on, take notes even, well if you can write, I make no assumptions).
10. It started strong. I'll give the girl that. If we exclude the initial braggy smugness of 'I keep getting compliments of how well I'm vlogging in quarantine'. Credit due, she did not need to adapt her hermit life in the banal bungalow too much. Other influencers, however adapted to this better than she ever anticipated. Lydia carried on having diarrhoea of the mouth but constipation of the ideas. Linen. Sprootlings. Sage Green. Beg. Repeat.
9. It all starts to go downhill from here. Lydia's incessant begging for more free tit she just does not need. In a global pandemic where nobody is going nowhere. I don’t consider her a vulture though. I consider her something a vulture would eat.
8. Depoping tit as new with tags that have already been worn or used. The highlight was flogging the clock for a whole pound. A bleeping pound. In an economic recession where people are losing their businesses and livelihoods. This one nearly didn't make the countdown though. Got to give credit to the poor fucker who packaged it up and trotted down to the post office. For a bleeping pound.
7. The tumbleweed is picking up speed now. The life quotes. The bleeping life quotes. I've created one just for you, Lydia. You'll like this, it's bespoke. Don't feel sad, don't feel blue, you're so dense, light must bend around you.
6. She obviously thought she was the exception in adhering to national social distancing measures. COVID-19 what? Did you forget to pay your brain bill Lydia?
5. Mid league, but still a hard hit. Accepting free food hampers in the middle of a bleeping global pandemic, then bragging in her defence how she's saving the world one heritage tomato at a time. Excellent time to become a missing person.
4. This is when it really starts to go wrong. Promoting herself as 'the best white person to black people' during the BLM movement. Ignorance can be cured. Stupid is forever however. I'm not even sure she knows what movement is after spending lockdown horizontal on that sofa. From Ikea. But she has luxury kitchenware did you all know? So the world is at zen.
3. This one hits differently. She's showing her true colours as a narcissistic gaslighting witch. Anyone who told you Lydia to be yourself couldn’t have given you worse advice. People show their true colours eventually. Yours issage green tit brown.
2. Obvious sign she's no longer kicking it, brands are staying way clear of her. At long last. They used to say you were a great asset, Lydia. I told them they were off by two letters. No Dior Bobby bag still, I note. Maybe it's still en-route, just like the Dior advent calendar which got sent to the wrong PO Box. Maybe it's just bullshit. People can’t say that you have absolutely nothing though. After all, you still have inferiority!
1. No brainer for the top spot. Glóby Flopitis. Ripping off then silencing her loyal followers for overpriced plastic mitts. They threw her to the wolves and she came out with a headache. I'm sorry you're mad that you've found out the world doesn't revolve around you, Lydia. Here let me pour you a tall glass of get over it.
10. It started strong. I'll give the girl that. If we exclude the initial braggy smugness of 'I keep getting compliments of how well I'm vlogging in quarantine'. Credit due, she did not need to adapt her hermit life in the banal bungalow too much. Other influencers, however adapted to this better than she ever anticipated. Lydia carried on having diarrhoea of the mouth but constipation of the ideas. Linen. Sprootlings. Sage Green. Beg. Repeat.
9. It all starts to go downhill from here. Lydia's incessant begging for more free tit she just does not need. In a global pandemic where nobody is going nowhere. I don’t consider her a vulture though. I consider her something a vulture would eat.
8. Depoping tit as new with tags that have already been worn or used. The highlight was flogging the clock for a whole pound. A bleeping pound. In an economic recession where people are losing their businesses and livelihoods. This one nearly didn't make the countdown though. Got to give credit to the poor fucker who packaged it up and trotted down to the post office. For a bleeping pound.
7. The tumbleweed is picking up speed now. The life quotes. The bleeping life quotes. I've created one just for you, Lydia. You'll like this, it's bespoke. Don't feel sad, don't feel blue, you're so dense, light must bend around you.
6. She obviously thought she was the exception in adhering to national social distancing measures. COVID-19 what? Did you forget to pay your brain bill Lydia?
5. Mid league, but still a hard hit. Accepting free food hampers in the middle of a bleeping global pandemic, then bragging in her defence how she's saving the world one heritage tomato at a time. Excellent time to become a missing person.
4. This is when it really starts to go wrong. Promoting herself as 'the best white person to black people' during the BLM movement. Ignorance can be cured. Stupid is forever however. I'm not even sure she knows what movement is after spending lockdown horizontal on that sofa. From Ikea. But she has luxury kitchenware did you all know? So the world is at zen.
3. This one hits differently. She's showing her true colours as a narcissistic gaslighting witch. Anyone who told you Lydia to be yourself couldn’t have given you worse advice. People show their true colours eventually. Yours is
2. Obvious sign she's no longer kicking it, brands are staying way clear of her. At long last. They used to say you were a great asset, Lydia. I told them they were off by two letters. No Dior Bobby bag still, I note. Maybe it's still en-route, just like the Dior advent calendar which got sent to the wrong PO Box. Maybe it's just bullshit. People can’t say that you have absolutely nothing though. After all, you still have inferiority!
1. No brainer for the top spot. Glóby Flopitis. Ripping off then silencing her loyal followers for overpriced plastic mitts. They threw her to the wolves and she came out with a headache. I'm sorry you're mad that you've found out the world doesn't revolve around you, Lydia. Here let me pour you a tall glass of get over it.
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Their relationship is like that of an arranged marriage or royalty - just for convenience and assets. Either Ali saw a business venture in getting together with Lydia or he has some fetish in being degraded, their relationship is not healthy or loving at all. I know 'we only see this or that' from some youtuber's days, but they've shown enough that you get the idea there is no romantic love there.
Just self-love.
Also why the hell is she shopping for summer clothes in nearly August, when she has so many clothes she hasn't worn out yet due to covid? Like, wear the stuff you bought in May or w/e now, nobody gives a carp
Just self-love.
Also why the hell is she shopping for summer clothes in nearly August, when she has so many clothes she hasn't worn out yet due to covid? Like, wear the stuff you bought in May or w/e now, nobody gives a carp
I guareentee you she will not have children, she's too selfish, she's just stringing Aldi along. He needs to find someone who's more maternal and loving.
If she does, those poor ones will be posting on whatever the equivalent of then is reddit's /r/raisedbynarcissists.
So much to say!!!!! Boooy does this thread move fast.
the beehive - swear she hates bugs and runs around flailing her arms when anything flies (apart from her ego cos flippin eck it is SOARING high).
whyyyy are you speaking to Ali like that... on camera! and he explained it was to keep the water away from the exterior / brickwork - but she was so vindictive he forgot his point and just kept repeating about water.
THE BABY VOICE - we all have one and sometimes do them in situations, where strangers listening in would find weird. but. Christ. in. A. Wicker. Basket. Darlings. give it a rest it’s her only interaction with him that’s nice in his vlogs.
end of rant thanks for keeping me entertained people, love the patter in these chats
the beehive - swear she hates bugs and runs around flailing her arms when anything flies (apart from her ego cos flippin eck it is SOARING high).
whyyyy are you speaking to Ali like that... on camera! and he explained it was to keep the water away from the exterior / brickwork - but she was so vindictive he forgot his point and just kept repeating about water.
THE BABY VOICE - we all have one and sometimes do them in situations, where strangers listening in would find weird. but. Christ. in. A. Wicker. Basket. Darlings. give it a rest it’s her only interaction with him that’s nice in his vlogs.
end of rant thanks for keeping me entertained people, love the patter in these chats
@Elle Belle laughing so much at the above top ten - would just love someone to be able to say it to her face. I think we should print it off and post it to her PO box along with some of your other comments.
.....“SAVING THE WORLD ONE HERITAGE TOMATO AT A TIME”
@Elle Belle you literally are hilarious! God I hope she reads your top ten
#truthbomb
@Elle Belle you literally are hilarious! God I hope she reads your top ten
#truthbomb
“I don’t normally go for a v-neck”, but when she first showed this jumpsuit yesterday, she said she had the dress version in black (and another color maybe?) 
GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT.
GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT.
@Elle Belle haha! Exactly!
They threw her to the wolves and she came out with a headache. I'm sorry you're mad that you've found out the world doesn't revolve around you, Lydia. Here let me pour you a tall glass of get over it.
They threw her to the wolves and she came out with a headache. I'm sorry you're mad that you've found out the world doesn't revolve around you, Lydia. Here let me pour you a tall glass of get over it.
My silly thread name idea....
Neptune sized Heritage Tomato up Uranus
or how about.....
Neptune Table Woes & No More Heritage Tomatoes!
Neptune sized Heritage Tomato up Uranus
or how about.....
Neptune Table Woes & No More Heritage Tomatoes!
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What will i do with a tomato, please, Lydia, don't show your toes, though
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