Liz Jones - You Magazine Columnist

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Her tattooed eyeliner and eyebrows, in that faded navy blue. šŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļø
I'm sceptical about the treatments and clothes, her hair screams home box dye, her face-lift was a freebie for an article. I honestly think she's a bitter old journo who lives with her cats.
She'd love to cause a stir about tattle, imagine the lies endlessly recycled.
Think it's just the untrained "puppies" she lives with now, the dogs have mauled all the cats to death :(
 
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I love that she mentioned tattle by name, I assume (just like with Salk Hughes) she will just drive people here šŸ˜‚
 
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She lied about how she reconnected with David too. She wrote an article about having a date with him, then a couple of years later She pretended heā€™d just got in touch again and they hadnā€™t seen each other since being neighbours.
The original article was removed by the Mail but was cut and pasted and posted on one of the DS threads.
Just flagging this as I think it should be in the wiki - itā€™s such a blatant provable lie. Iā€™ll see if I can find the deetsā€¦

Found it! Was printed in the Mail and then re,over.
she later pretends she meets him again in the Dreary:

"Liz,' the northern voice on the other end of the phone said. 'It's David Scrace.' This is someone I hadn't spoken to for 22 years. My first proper, proper love, someone I would have given anything in order to make him love me back.

We arranged to meet for lunch. I spent hours getting ready.

Would I be a disappointment after all these years? He had sent me a text saying he hoped he wouldn't be a disappointment.

Because he had never dumped me, I had never got over him. He was my, 'What if?' I remember what it was like, loving him.

It was a fierce longing I have never felt since.

When we met I was 20, 21 and he was 32. If he had only succumbed to my charms, I could have had a happier life, been, well, normal. I would probably even have a giant teenager by now.

I got to the restaurant early.

'Your guest is already here,' said the ma"tre d'. I looked over at the small man at the bar. He had really long, grey hair but the twinkle in the eyes was still there. We hugged. We sat down. I told him I wanted some answers, closure. He looked scared.
For Cathrin.....


'Did you know I loved you?' I asked him. 'No, I didn't have a clue,' he said. 'But even your best friend guessed,' I persisted. 'He never mentioned it,' he replied. (What do men talk about?) I asked him if I had actually told him how I felt, would he have gone out with me? 'No,' he said. 'You just weren't my type. You really had a lucky escape. I'm a complete waste of space.

It would have ended badly.' He told me he had got married in 1985, had a son, Ben, now 18, and then his marriage broke up because he had an affair. He lived in France for few years, but is now back in London, with a new girlfriend, Paola, who is two years younger than I am. 'Did you realise our trip to see Siouxsie and the Banshees was a date?' I asked him. 'Um, no. I don't remember even going, to be honest.' He commented on the fact I must be really successful. 'Yes, well, I threw myself into work when I couldn't have you,' I said, which was true. Plus, my self-esteem had taken a mortal blow.

When I got home, I cried for my 21-year-old self. If I had known then what I know now - that David would marry two years later, that I would wait 20 years before I found someone who loved me back - I would have given up there and then. If I think of all the time and effort I put into making him love me - the squash lessons, the concert tickets - and for what?

I had reminded him that at the party I held in 1983, just so that I could invite him, he had got off with my friend Wilma.

'How on earth is she?' he had said as I paid the bill. I asked if he thought I had changed. 'You still have the same hairstyle. To be honest, I hadn't even remembered your name,' he said, walking out of my life all over again."

Publication dated 9th October 2005.

Also for the Wiki - she names and abuses ā€œGarner Fructis womanā€ via inserting her name into one of her Diaries.
i wont do exact quote as it gives away her surname but she wrote
ā€greedy witchā€
where greedy was GFWs surname. Her surname is an unusual yet descriptive word.
Iā€™ve just looked for the article online and I think she has had it edited out now.
 
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Iā€™m laughing Iā€™ll never forget years ago I used to visit my gran and whilst I was there Iā€™d flick through her Sunday Mail so I was aware of liz and her antics

one Sunday evening I was in Edinburgh at the bar of the Dome with my husband and you know when you can feel someone watching you I turned round and low and behold it was mad Liz at least I was pretty sure it was it was only when she wrote about being in the Dome in her following weeks column that I knew it was
 
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A missed opportunity for mischief there !
I wonder if people DO wind her up on purpose to see if they make it into her column ?

Anyway hello all ; glad to make your acquaintance ā€¦.I have found my way here by todayā€™s column ā€¦.. I suspect I shall become quite addicted as I was with the DS thread ( though it was closed by the time I found it)
 
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Did she not have a bunch of sockpuppets on Mumsnet at one point?
Indeed she did! All based around KitKat names as I recall, desperately trying to stir up interest in the Fake Rock Star.

Is she still living in North Yorkshire does anyone know?
Yup, she shares a rented hovel with Nic at Easby Hall (ex-servants' quarters). When she sold some stuff on Ebay there were some interior shots. The place was quite squalid.
 
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Yup, she shares a rented hovel with Nic at Easby Hall (ex-servants' quarters). When she sold some stuff on Ebay there were some interior shots. The place was quite squalid.
Ahhh that means on her many jaunts to London she will still be travelling from my local rail stationā€¦ would love to see her to be nosy!
 
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Ahhh that means on her many jaunts to London she will still be travelling from my local rail stationā€¦ would love to see her to be nosy!
She is easy to spot, but you tend to hear her first! She tends to bellow this weird Essex nasal whine, which rather jars the ear, then hoves into view. Quite tall, about a 12 I would guess, with the most extraordinary hair, a bit like a hallowe'en wig and strikingly wingnut ears.
 
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She is easy to spot, but you tend to hear her first! She tends to bellow this weird Essex nasal whine, which rather jars the ear, then hoves into view. Quite tall, about a 12 I would guess, with the most extraordinary hair, a bit like a hallowe'en wig and strikingly wingnut ears.
Size 12! She'll call in an airstrike on tattle for that. šŸ˜‚ Agree though, she doesn't look the size 8 she implies.
 
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I do wonder what the deal is with Nic. I think she was originally taken on in Devon to deal with the animals, and sheā€™s obviously still in Lizā€™s employ (and even followed her up to Yorkshire), maybe as a personal assistant of some sort? But it seems a strange, slightly toxic relationship where Nic is mainly there to be the butt of Lizā€™s ā€œjokesā€. Iā€™ve no doubt Nic is under instructions to do a bit of sock-puppetry from time to time as well.
I tried the podcast a couple of times but couldnā€™t get further than a few minutes. Theyā€™re not exactly comedy gold.

Re her untrained dogs: Liz seems to think itā€™s hilarious and cute that her dogs chew everything and piss everywhere (and maul and kill her poor cats šŸ˜”), but dogs need structure and discipline. Those dogs must be really confused and unhappy. And no, itā€™s not cute getting chucked out of a restaurant because your dogs have crapped on the floor. Imagine being another diner. šŸ¤¢
 
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Size 12! She'll call in an airstrike on tattle for that. šŸ˜‚ Agree though, she doesn't look the size 8 she implies.
No, I think a 12 is fair... she's certainly well nourished... carries a bit extra on her arms and caboose. Very much "average build".
 
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I love that she mentioned tattle by name, I assume (just like with Salk Hughes) she will just drive people here šŸ˜‚
I came to tattle a few months ago for the Mr & Mrs Markle threads. The tattle mention will backfire on her for sure.
 
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I do wonder what the deal is with Nic. I think she was originally taken on in Devon to deal with the animals, and sheā€™s obviously still in Lizā€™s employ (and even followed her up to Yorkshire), maybe as a personal assistant of some sort? But it seems a strange, slightly toxic relationship where Nic is mainly there to be the butt of Lizā€™s ā€œjokesā€. Iā€™ve no doubt Nic is under instructions to do a bit of sock-puppetry from time to time as well.
I tried the podcast a couple of times but couldnā€™t get further than a few minutes. Theyā€™re not exactly comedy gold.

Re her untrained dogs: Liz seems to think itā€™s hilarious and cute that her dogs chew everything and piss everywhere (and maul and kill her poor cats šŸ˜”), but dogs need structure and discipline. Those dogs must be really confused and unhappy. And no, itā€™s not cute getting chucked out of a restaurant because your dogs have crapped on the floor. Imagine being another diner. šŸ¤¢
The Nic thing is one of life's great mysteries. When Jonesey had some cash, Nic left a humdrum admin gig to become J's gopher. She got her feet under the table, vicarious fame and a decent gaff. When she moved to Low Row, Nic got (another) paid for home separate from the Big 'Ouse (the deets are probably still online... search Lawn House, Low Row... there's an old pdf of the sales details). It was here that Nic's role took on a darker hue... she was 'tasked' with sweet talking their neighbour so J could get her hands on his land. It all went a bit wrong, the neighbour thought Nic's intentions were more sincere and it kicked off.
Then, of course, HMRC caught up with Jonesey and the jig was up! Bankrupt and disgraced, the houses had to go and she was allowed a modest pittance to exist by the Receiver (it's a beautiful holiday home now, BTW.)
By this stage, bearing in mind how their relationship had developed, J had no option but to keep Nic on (indeed, while J was forbidden to be a company director, Nic was the sole director of Liz Jones Goddess Ltd (yes, really). Now the company is rollicking along with a credit score of 25/100 and is officially 'high risk, Nic is only Company Sec now. The mystery director Adam Kelly resigned in 2018... possibly appointed by the Receiver?
So, now being codependent and knowing where the metaphorical bodies are buried, Nic's future is assured with, I suspect, many promises of 'jam tomorrow' when the novel/screenplay/tour finally pay off (bwahaha). I would be fascinated to know what will happen when J finally gets put out to grass...
 
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The increasing number of people coming to tattle after sheā€™s mentioned it will just give her something else to complain about, so she will probably keep mentioning it.
 
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The increasing number of people coming to tattle after sheā€™s mentioned it will just give her something else to complain about, so she will probably keep mentioning it.
I suspect she wants more mentions on here too. The comments on here and under her articles have tailed off, the interest is not there. So, having a thriving ā€œdislikeā€ thread shows her publishers that she is still a talking point. That is her motive I think. If I was in the public eye and hated the comments on a website, last thing I would do would be to mention it.
 
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Iā€™ve met Liz in real life, a very long time ago. It was when she was editor of Marie Claire at the so-called Fat Summit at the Cabinet Office.
two things struck me - she was tiny and not in a good way. She had the oversized head and stick thin physique of we now know was a recovering anorexic.
she was very quiet and subdued. Answered questions as a panel member in very few words. Looked like sheā€™d rather be anywhere else . I suspect she knew then that her campaign, laudable as it was at the time, had cost her the job.
 
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