Liz Jones #2 Nobody puts the Myla Thong in a corner!

[shushablay]

She knew the game was up, yet again, with the FRS as she frantically tried to resurrect him to try and fill her diary/column/fantasy fiction bs, but that's going nowhere because he doesn't actually exist..oh she might like to think in her head that it is Jim Kerr, it's the only description that matches, though notably she throws out red herrings, such as having lunch with him on his milestone birthday last year (JK was 62 that year so not a notable birthday but it was around the time of JK's birthday, so it was probably about covering her backside with, see I'm not referring to JK) Nope the FRS is a fantasy in Jones head, always has been and now she cannot get away with it the same as she could a few years ago, with the explosion of the internet and the fact that everyday, ordinary people can get immediate access to vast amounts of information..you do not need to be a "journalist" with access to professional resources to find out, pretty much anything.

As for David, I think it was him who told her to stop and the blocked blocked blocked was in fact him telling her to go away. She tried very hard to manipulate and control him with the "gift" of an iPhone, but to his credit, he refused it. As such I think she knew there's nowhere to go with the FRS so back to David for another try in a seemingly, unsuccessful attempt at scraping the barrel for more crap to write about. The audacity as well that she apparently told him to come and stay with her for the summer, so he could be looked after..aye right..when she herself is facing eviction when her rented place is sold. So I tend to agree with others who have said that what she was really angling for, was getting her foot in his door, giving her column inches about broken lightbulbs and untidy gardens, whilst also having a place to stay. Despicable woman.

 

[Nosmo_King]

She knew the game was up, yet again, with the FRS as she frantically tried to resurrect him to try and fill her diary/column/fantasy fiction bs, but that's going nowhere because he doesn't actually exist..oh she might like to think in her head that it is Jim Kerr, it's the only description that matches, though notably she throws out red herrings, such as having lunch with him on his milestone birthday last year (JK was 62 that year so not a notable birthday but it was around the time of JK's birthday, so it was probably about covering her backside with, see I'm not referring to JK) Nope the FRS is a fantasy in Jones head, always has been and now she cannot get away with it the same as she could a few years ago, with the explosion of the internet and the fact that everyday, ordinary people can get immediate access to vast amounts of information..you do not need to be a "journalist" with access to professional resources to find out, pretty much anything.

As for David, I think it was him who told her to stop and the blocked blocked blocked was in fact him telling her to go away. She tried very hard to manipulate and control him with the "gift" of an iPhone, but to his credit, he refused it. As such I think she knew there's nowhere to go with the FRS so back to David for another try in a seemingly, unsuccessful attempt at scraping the barrel for more crap to write about. The audacity as well that she apparently told him to come and stay with her for the summer, so he could be looked after..aye right..when she herself is facing eviction when her rented place is sold. So I tend to agree with others who have said that what she was really angling for, was getting her foot in his door, giving her column inches about broken lightbulbs and untidy gardens, whilst also having a place to stay. Despicable woman.

BiB - is she going to employ a carer then because she can't even look after her dogs and as for looking after herself...

 

[Origen]

Her tea’s oot on this one , Shushababy! The lies, the lies!
What’s the way back, eh?

 

[shushablay]

probably more lies and a resurgence of tinder dates, how generous and badly treated she is and whining about how much money she spent on her rented cottage, that the landlord is cruelly ditching her out of. She maybe thought that by mentioning the bathroom and kitchen fittings, they would immediately knock 150k off the asking price, so she could afford it with her measly 200k mortgage offer.

 

[Mediastar]

Morning! Here's the Drear. If you have tears of mirth, prepare to shed them now! We all recall the sales successes of Jonesey's past, I'm sure: "The Girl with the Jug Shaped Ears", "8 ½ Copies Sold" and (yet to appear) "The Turtle's Head"?
I'm sure we also remember her Screenplay ("This Movie What I Wrote") that is probably *ahem* still in production?
Well all these are as nothing compared to the real book she's been writing all these years: "Emily Wilding Davidson's H-Plan Diet: How To Get The Man of Your Dreams".
Cram a noggin of Old Rope's End Twist Shag into your favourite pipe, toss another servant on the fire and enjoy...

 

[witchofwestbyfleet]

Are you bleeping surprised your new novel wasn't deemed good enough? It's a thinly veiled revenge fantasy against your ex, it's shoddily written, and based on the first chapter there is no damn way you should have taken five years to put that together!

 

[Mediastar]

Sorry, bollixed up the screen grabbed... here's the actual...

 

[The Tipsy Titian]

She's wondering what the owners of the houses in Notting Hill do for a living. Think that's irrelevant love, they obviously don't piss their money up the nearest wall

 

[shushablay]

Ok so the rock star is allegedly still gigging all over Europe to pay for his ex-wives and giant children??? Erm right ok, I didn't think you had to pay child support for adults and I doubt that Chrissie or Patsy need his money (cos lets face it, that's the fantasy that she's clinging to that the FRS is JK) It also looks like David has stopped her in her tracks, not a single mention of him despite last weeks melodrama.

And refusing a viewer for the property or as she refers to it as "my cottage" not it's not jug ears, it does not belong to you and if I were her landlord, she'd be getting her eviction notice as she is obviously going to be obstructive and uncooperative with the sales process, I'd be ripping her kitchen and bathroom out and replace it with my own and she can get stuffed, it's clearly delaying tactics in the hope the owner can't sell it and she'll get it at a reduced cost..that of course is if she actually has a 200k mortgage offer, cos if she did there are plenty of places she could buy, and no it wouldn't just be a caravan, you stupid woman.

As for her ridiculous moans this week, sheesh what a load of drivel and she's surprised her book was turned down, but they really like her voice??? not quite sure what that was supposed to mean, maybe I have misunderstood it, then again is so badly written that's not surprising.

 

[The Tipsy Titian]

Ok so the rock star is allegedly still gigging all over Europe to pay for his ex-wives and giant children??? Erm right ok, I didn't think you had to pay child support for adults and I doubt that Chrissie or Patsy need his money (cos lets face it, that's the fantasy that she's clinging to that the FRS is JK) It also looks like David has stopped her in her tracks, not a single mention of him despite last weeks melodrama.

And refusing a viewer for the property or as she refers to it as "my cottage" not it's not jug ears, it does not belong to you and if I were her landlord, she'd be getting her eviction notice as she is obviously going to be obstructive and uncooperative with the sales process, I'd be ripping her kitchen and bathroom out and replace it with my own and she can get stuffed, it's clearly delaying tactics in the hope the owner can't sell it and she'll get it at a reduced cost..that of course is if she actually has a 200k mortgage offer, cos if she did there are plenty of places she could buy, and no it wouldn't just be a caravan, you stupid woman.

As for her ridiculous moans this week, sheesh what a load of drivel and she's surprised her book was turned down, but they really like her voice??? not quite sure what that was supposed to mean, maybe I have misunderstood it, then again is so badly written that's not surprising.

If I was the landlord she'd have been given notice to quit and told to remove her awful kitchen and bath before she left. I bet they regret the day she crossed their threshold. Imagine viewing it, 2 doubly incontinent dogs living there

 

[Mediastar]

Ok so the rock star is allegedly still gigging all over Europe to pay for his ex-wives and giant children??? Erm right ok, I didn't think you had to pay child support for adults and I doubt that Chrissie or Patsy need his money (cos lets face it, that's the fantasy that she's clinging to that the FRS is JK) It also looks like David has stopped her in her tracks, not a single mention of him despite last weeks melodrama.

And refusing a viewer for the property or as she refers to it as "my cottage" not it's not jug ears, it does not belong to you and if I were her landlord, she'd be getting her eviction notice as she is obviously going to be obstructive and uncooperative with the sales process, I'd be ripping her kitchen and bathroom out and replace it with my own and she can get stuffed, it's clearly delaying tactics in the hope the owner can't sell it and she'll get it at a reduced cost..that of course is if she actually has a 200k mortgage offer, cos if she did there are plenty of places she could buy, and no it wouldn't just be a caravan, you stupid woman.

As for her ridiculous moans this week, sheesh what a load of drivel and she's surprised her book was turned down, but they really like her voice??? not quite sure what that was supposed to mean, maybe I have misunderstood it, then again is so badly written that's not surprising.

Two of her 'moans' are deliberately targeting Dscrace... and I thought she had a PA to deal with mundane domestic issues?

 

[shushablay]

Two of her 'moans' are deliberately targeting Dscrace... and I thought she had a PA to deal with mundane domestic issues?

I really just glanced at it, and noticed something about men and dishwashers, tapped out and didn't really take it in haha

 

[The Tipsy Titian]

Ok so the rock star is allegedly still gigging all over Europe to pay for his ex-wives and giant children??? Erm right ok, I didn't think you had to pay child support for adults and I doubt that Chrissie or Patsy need his money (cos lets face it, that's the fantasy that she's clinging to that the FRS is JK) It also looks like David has stopped her in her tracks, not a single mention of him despite last weeks melodrama.

And refusing a viewer for the property or as she refers to it as "my cottage" not it's not jug ears, it does not belong to you and if I were her landlord, she'd be getting her eviction notice as she is obviously going to be obstructive and uncooperative with the sales process, I'd be ripping her kitchen and bathroom out and replace it with my own and she can get stuffed, it's clearly delaying tactics in the hope the owner can't sell it and she'll get it at a reduced cost..that of course is if she actually has a 200k mortgage offer, cos if she did there are plenty of places she could buy, and no it wouldn't just be a caravan, you stupid woman.

As for her ridiculous moans this week, sheesh what a load of drivel and she's surprised her book was turned down, but they really like her voice??? not quite sure what that was supposed to mean, maybe I have misunderstood it, then again is so badly written that's not surprising.

Haven't the giant children he's supposedly still paying for got children of their own?

 

[shushablay]

Haven't the giant children he's supposedly still paying for got children of their own?

yep so he's not going to be paying for support, obviously he's their father/grandfather and probably likes to treat them, but he's not forced to do it and any divorce settlements with the ex's will have been made years ago, you don't have to keep paying for the rest of your life, she really lives in her own wee fantasy land.

 

[Mediastar]

Haven't the giant children he's supposedly still paying for got children of their own?

She has no concept of time or how it moves on and affects other people, simply because she doesn't appreciate that other people might have an existence that doesn't include her!
Emotionally, she is twelve. Professionally she thinks she is forty and at the top of her game (despite being a washed-up soak with nothing to show for the past forty years but a couple of paperweights). She has no taste (evidenced from the interiors of various properties she's sold or had repossessed), she has no family (her relations have disowned her and a smiling Fate decreed she shouldn't breed), she has no friends (the one that 'facilitated' the sale of Lawn House took a healthy cut of the profits having convinced her to pay over the odds).
She cannot face the reality that she is, what, 64? Startlingly plain, no capital (though I'm not actually convinced she ever declared her Somerset land-holding to HMRC) and staring down the barrel of a bleak old(er) age.

 

[The Tipsy Titian]

So we were right about the untrained dogs. She's never bothered to train the latest rescue so she calls in a trainer when she can't do anything with him. Never house trained the others either and seems happy to advertise the fact they mess and wee indoors and yet she's still allowed to take on a rescue dog

 

[shushablay]

And should anyone dare to question her suitability then they are trashed..and named..publicly, in a Sunday newspaper, (magazine, online etc) in her bile filled tit fest.

One positive I take is that Teddy understands that it is not a healthy environment, not only the tit and piss around him, but his new person is also toxic and only gives "love and approval" to those who meet her needs..if I was Teddy I think I'd rather be back in Romania

 

[The Tipsy Titian]

And should anyone dare to question her suitability then they are trashed..and named..publicly, in a Sunday newspaper, (magazine, online etc) in her bile filled tit fest.

One positive I take is that Teddy understands that it is not a healthy environment, not only the tit and piss around him, but his new person is also toxic and only gives "love and approval" to those who meet her needs..if I was Teddy I think I'd rather be back in Romania

At least he wouldn't be trussed up in a bloody harness all the time

 

[Bellagio10452]

And should anyone dare to question her suitability then they are trashed..and named..publicly, in a Sunday newspaper, (magazine, online etc) in her bile filled tit fest.

I'm seriously tempted to email Steph to say "TOLD YA !!!".

 

[Origen]

So the Muses of Literature and Epic Poetry have thrown down their Lyres and Styluses and commanded… ‘Thon Tortoise of Liz Jones( Turtle’s head) shall’t never be published!’
Achingly awful as it was, I am a tad disappointed. It would have been a hoot to read, given we had Liz ‘Villanelle’ Jones about to murder Scracey and Garnier Fructis woman.
It could have been the ‘Spinal Tap’of Chick Lit forever?
On serious note. Poor Teddy, I wish she would give him away to a consistent, loving owner(s) where he’s the only dog and can relax. Those sensitive and clever dogs are living amongst negativity and anger, day in, day out. They are buffer zones for human angst. Selfish Cow.

The Fake Rock Star really should now be called The Fake Jim Kerr. It so thinly veiled to be excruciating reading. He IS gigging all over Europe just now just not phoning her about his ex wives alimony.. he wouldn’t recognise LJ in a police line-up!
Given that there are also recent interviews around, ( I posted one here a month or so ago?)about Yumi his girlfriend of 22 years, their hotel and lifestyle… it’s getting bloody offensive. Maybe he has an open relationship but…Liz Jones as a bit on the side?!
Nonsense, malignant narcissistic nonsense.