Jack Monroe #76 £300 mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the poorest of us all?

[lilamay]

At least a few squiggles are speaking sense...

This one though - they're talking about JKR but could quite easily be talking about Jack!

 

[Ninch55]

Whiter than mayonnaise

Don’t forget Manky Pink, Panky Mink, Peeky Mike etc etc

 

[Steerpike88]

I just thought the same, after reading that little snippet. Equally as humourless and miserable as her dad. The way he talks about fostering, you don’t get a sense of love and care, it’s that same thing that Jack does - INSISTS on being so kind and helpful, but with a constant touch of bitterness about the personal cost. I totally agree that foster carers should be paid really well but those children need way more than a roof over their heads, they need to feel secure, wanted, and loved. Sounds like he begrudges being a foster carer and it’s all just such hard work - nobody’s forcing you mate!! I’m sensing that theme of wanging on about begrudging their self-imposed public duty. Army, fire service, fostering. Not in a quiet, unassuming, just gets on with it type of way - it all has to be publicly droned on about. It is actually quite astonishing how many interviews there are with her dad, and they all circle around in the same fashion. Ostensibly talking about improving foster caring, but somehow talking about him and his achievements at great length. The Apple really didn’t fall far from the tree, did it?

I think you're right on the money. She definitely got the appetite for fame from her dad. I felt quite sorry for her parents but no ones put her in her place and it seems like they don't care to, they've just unleashed her on the world selfish, rude, money grubbing and thoughtless. You get bad eggs, but I think most people just get it from their parents. You're 100% right about her humourless demeanour. Her comic kitchen shows that well. It was just bizarre and psychotic and even threatening.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Regarding the kombucha because it's annoying me - it's true that most commercial booch is 0.5% abv or less. Homemade however can reach up to 4 times that amount.

Flavourings should only be added in the SF, second ferment, as to add them in with the scoby in the first ferment can cause mould and spoil the scoby. So the one she was brewing with toasted rice and sage in - wrong.

When first starting to eat or drink ferments, it's a good idea to introduce little amounts at first into your diet. If she's wolfing down tons of her new AF whiskey, she's likely to suffer from bloating and the shits.

In short, she hasn't a bloody clue. Which is fine, but don't pretend you're an expert and start reaching out for collabs after making something once

 

[Ellabella]

How is she "monitoring" the alcohol content of the kombucha? Drinking as much as she can and seeing if she can still stand up? Also whisky isn't fizzy the last time I looked.

 

[Scarletfever]

Oooh another sense talking squiggle!

 

[Steerpike88]

Also whisky isn't fizzy the last time I looked.

I'm sorry are you a professional alcoholic like Jack was? I'm sure she knows the most about fizzy whiskey

 

[Scarletfever]

How is she "monitoring" the alcohol content of the kombucha? Drinking as much as she can and seeing if she can still stand up? Also whisky isn't fizzy the last time I looked.

I think we need to add "chemist" to her list of expertise, as she is clearly able to accurately monitor alcohol content.

 

[Bugger13]

What’s this about? Has this squiggle been in a coma?
Jack is the person MOST asking to be challenged with her batshit arrogance & contradictions.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

I think we need to add "chemist" to her list of expertise, as she is clearly able to accurately monitor alcohol content.

She claims to have been a trainee pharmacist back in the day, so I think it's already on the list!

 

[Montrachet]

When first starting to eat or drink ferments, it's a good idea to introduce little amounts at first into your diet. If she's wolfing down tons of her new AF whiskey, she's likely to suffer from bloating and the shits.

I have always maintained that her farts would clear a room. Taking a bowl of Ramen noodles, eggs and mackerel to bed at 2am may have been the final straw for Mrs J, and can't rule out the distinct possibility that her rancid guff could easily have overwhelmed Sophie Ellis Pretzel in a sealed bathroom.

 

[I’MBUSY!]

Hehehehehehe. She says that SB may be “developing an enthusiasm for cookery”.

Slow your roll, Jackie; isn’t that Buddy Oliver’s “niche”.

 

[Emmapism]

Don’t forget Manky Pink, Panky Mink, Peeky Mike etc etc

Peeky Mike!

 

[blurstoftimes]

Hehehehehehe. She says that SB may be “developing an enthusiasm for cookery”.

Slow your roll, Jackie; isn’t that Buddy Oliver’s “niche”.

we already knew this, he was going to the shops, paying for his own sausages and making lasagne with no help by the age of 6! Buddy Oliver could NEVER.

 

[Veronicaaa]

I'd develop a passion for cookery pretty damn sharpish too if my only alternative was eating Jack's slop.

 

[Dogmuck]

What’s this about? Has this squiggle been in a coma?
Jack is the person MOST asking to be challenged with her batshit arrogance & contradictions.

Wtf? Has jack done some kind of miracle or two I’ve missed? Did she make that water into kombucha? Did she turn her living wage into Cotswolds furniture? Is she the new messiah? If not why the duck would she be beyond challenge? She’s a tit cook with a bullshit pov story, she absolutely needs challenging. Jebus Cripes her fans are actually bat tit crazy!

 

[I’MBUSY!]

I’ll post the whole thing, for your reading pleasure.

I’m proud of you, Fraus - she addresses the “five a day” fiasco. Except there’s no way there’s even 70g of kale in there.

Sausage, Bacon & Many-Veg Casserole, 39p

For many reasons, I am returning to a very strict groceries budget for the foreseeable future. Yesterday I went to the supermarket – in two separate trips, as I was on foot with a backpack &#…

cookingonabootstrap.com

 

[blurstoftimes]

I’ll post the whole thing, for your reading pleasure.

I’m proud of you, Fraus - she addresses the “five a day” fiasco. Except there’s no way there’s even 70g of kale in there.

Sausage, Bacon & Many-Veg Casserole, 39p

For many reasons, I am returning to a very strict groceries budget for the foreseeable future. Yesterday I went to the supermarket – in two separate trips, as I was on foot with a backpack &#…

cookingonabootstrap.com

Wow that intro is basically a letter to Tattle isn't it?

There are many things that are tit about this recipe, including that crap soggy looking rice but I would most importantly like to point out that she tells you to add bacon after adding water. Boiled bacon.

Edit: I misread the recipe because it is so convoluted! Its just throwing tit in a pan. Baked bean casserole. urgh.

 

[Ninch55]

What’s this about? Has this squiggle been in a coma?
Jack is the person MOST asking to be challenged with her batshit arrogance & contradictions.

Arselickius In Extremis

 

[Bugger13]

I’ll post the whole thing, for your reading pleasure.

I’m proud of you, Fraus - she addresses the “five a day” fiasco. Except there’s no way there’s even 70g of kale in there.

Sausage, Bacon & Many-Veg Casserole, 39p

For many reasons, I am returning to a very strict groceries budget for the foreseeable future. Yesterday I went to the supermarket – in two separate trips, as I was on foot with a backpack &#…

cookingonabootstrap.com

‘For many reasons...’
‘Tattle spotted my £300 sentient mirror & I’m worried my patreons might realise I’m not poor’.
Or ‘tattle si všiml mého vnímajícího zrcadla 300 liber a obávám se, že by si moji patroni mohli uvědomit, že nejsem chudý’ (Czech)