Jack Monroe #73 If your attitude is off-kilter, try a cartoon filter

[Oofadoofa]

Echoing previous comments, but who the duck is Natalia? It would be brilliant if Caroline quit after being furloughed/not being furloughed/getting paid by Monroe /but definitely getting paid by the government/or perhaps not getting paid at all and all so that her boss can sad fish for the bother it left HER in. And who knows, maybe she’s amongst us? Caroline, reveal yourself!

And re the letter thing. Did anyone else read about the binder for her son and imagine that his narcissist mum made him a binder of positive things others have said about HER? Haha. As in “don’t worry son, if you’re ever feeling down just pull out that binder I gave you and read about how amazing your mother is...”

 

[Begborrowsteal]

We all know shes a bleeping eejit, but giving your kid affirmations as well? duck off. So poncey.

 

[Cariad]

Yeh one of her followers has just replied:

View attachment 244953

Maybe if she hadn't gone on a twitter delete , she'd still be able to see them

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

Do we know what her handwriting looks like? This reminds me of the time Mrs Hinch sent a fan card to herself

Sorry I'm such a conspiracy wanker

She has amazing handwriting - as shown when she posted a selfie with a note to @Yel To prove it was her. I was very jealous

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

View attachment 244733Ain't that the truth. Have you been reading Tattle again Jack? The clock is ticking!

Oh don’t be modest Jack. What about the time your superhuman strength came to the fore and you sent your son flying off a swing?, The time you told Jude Law to sit the duck down because you needed to see Redcar & let’s not forget the famous shin kicking incident on the train because your personal space is to be respected.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

She has amazing handwriting - as shown when she posted a selfie with a note to @Yel To prove it was her. I was very jealous

'Tis really nice, I agree! The selfie in question:

 

[Veronicaaa]

Did it even exist to begin with? Who knows It's hard to know what to believe...

Oh I'm absolutely positive she did in fact create a lever arch folder specifically for any praise she got! I'm also absolutely positive it's somewhere in her house along with all the rest of her lever arch folders, perhaps she's misfiled it in the 'trolls' section of one of her massive bookcases.

 

[Emmapism]

Lovely penmanship!

 

[lilamay]

She's being outraged on twitter again, this time about the news that people may have to book in for A&E appointments. Someone replied with this:

Yeah, like Jack when she went to A&E with her 'black eye' !

 

[kachoochoo]

Natalie works at her literary agency. Jack has just given this woman (without running it past her first) the job of opening her post. So, having to travel to the workplace, open a load of mail, during Covid, read it all to protect JM from the mean stuff, then package it all up and arrange delivery to Southend. I'd be fuming.

I'd be wanting a decent bonus for this malarkey if I was her

 

[BananaSmith]

Thanks @kachoochoo for the screenshots. I'm not one of Jack's closest 280k friends so could only imagine these latest delights until now
Wow, just when you think you've seen it all, she surprises you again.

 

[Switchstreetz]

Don’t know I just do a drive-by liking

Babe, same

when they come up in the thread you press like or another emoji. The one with the most wins.
I'm useless because I 'like' them all which does nothing for anyone!!!

Its this bunch of mithering ninny maven's fault - if you weren't all so witty we wouldn't have to like all the posts on here
!!!

 

[Bookweevil]

Well I'm pretty sure Mr Cow isn't one as when I was about to go to the supermarket yesterday I said 'I'd best slip into a pair of traaaaazers' (I hadn't been working naked fyi, i had been a lazy arse and not got out of my pjs) and he asked me why I was being weird.

I can’t say it any other way now. Same as when my friend told me her grandma insisted on spelling onion ‘union’ which makes perfect sense to me and I can no longer unsee it.

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

'Tis really nice, I agree! The selfie in question:

View attachment 244967

Something confuses me about her handwriting. It is beautiful I have to say but she’ll then say it’s awful and post a bunch of scribble I’d post a photo but I’m sadly not in her close friend circle of a quarter of a million.

 

[Pocahontas]

'Tis really nice, I agree! The selfie in question:

View attachment 244967

I remember you actually complimented her on her handwriting on the day. Made me lol. She didn’t respond though, did she? Rude.

 

[blurstoftimes]

Babe, same



Its this bunch of mithering ninny maven's fault - if you weren't all so witty we wouldn't have to like all the posts on here
!!!

'Still MITHERING on about things you know duck all about' still makes me chuckle, especially because it was within the context of us being wrong about where her phone was charging

 

[PoorPatrol]

She has amazing handwriting - as shown when she posted a selfie with a note to @Yel To prove it was her. I was very jealous

That message she wrote to Yel still gives me the heebie jeebies

 

[Ninch55]

Having a son around the same age I was disgusted when she wrote yesterday about her son’s “smeggy underwear”, it’s just a repulsive phrase to use and if his friends are on social media he will well and truly get the piss ripped out him. She treats him like a baby, I’m still shocked she puts him to bed at 7.30pm. Like how? I have to cajole mine about 2 hrs later to attempt to get him to bed!

She probably doesn’t, it’ll just be more of her ‘Supermom’ bullshit.

 

[MarmiteExtract]

I remember you actually complimented her on her handwriting on the day. Made me lol. She didn’t respond though, did she? Rude.

Haha, I did! I love how it's all seared into our collective psyche. But no, sadly that comment went unanswered, as did my question about her favourite thread title.

 

[Tabitha D]

Oh god, now she's begging her followers to tell her how amazing she is so she can fill another lever arch (lol) with their praise. I'm so bleeping embarrassed for her

ETA: duck I didn't realise she meant physically send stuff. This is really bleeping pathetic.

Why on earth is she doing this? Does she want fulsome praise to pad out her book? Or is she hoping for cash/gifts? Either way, the woman’s narcissism is out of control.