In 1972 in the UK, a band called Lieutenant Pigeon got a number one hit with a song called 'Mouldy Old Dough'. 'Mouldy Old Dough' were the only three words in the song. Whenever JM mentions her next cookery book, those three words seem like an apt title.
Jack Monroe #65 Green gages and ham
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Crikey, I remember that song. Thanks for the ear worm
x
Not only a food expert, oh no! According to the latest insta tags, she is now also a food STYLIST no less!!
These are the lyrics for the Rolling Stones 'Jumpin Jack Flash'. I haven't changed them because it looks like Mick Jagger and Keith Richards wrote it about her - decades before she was even born. They even had the foresight to write about 'a crust of bread'. I think Mick and Keef were a couple of psychics.
I was born in a cross-fire hurricane
And I howled at the morning driving rain
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas
But it's all right. I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash
It's a gas, gas, gas
I was raised by a toothless, bearded hag,
I was schooled with a strap right across my back
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas
But it's all right, I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash
It's a gas, gas, gas
I was drowned, I was washed up and left for dead
I fell down to my feet and I saw they bled , yeah yeah
I frowned at the crumbs of a crust of bread
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I was crowned with a spike right through my head
But it's all right…
I was born in a cross-fire hurricane
And I howled at the morning driving rain
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas
But it's all right. I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash
It's a gas, gas, gas
I was raised by a toothless, bearded hag,
I was schooled with a strap right across my back
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas
But it's all right, I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash
It's a gas, gas, gas
I was drowned, I was washed up and left for dead
I fell down to my feet and I saw they bled , yeah yeah
I frowned at the crumbs of a crust of bread
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I was crowned with a spike right through my head
But it's all right…
Absolutely for a non-"crappy bungalow" that she owns.
Actually, it's a really nice two-storey house in a good area which could maybe do with some upgrading re windows and doors, and possibly heating, but I wouldn't sneeze at it.
Those potatoes look exactly like the ones that are in Tesco's £10 meal deal at the moment. A trip to Tesco Express this afternoon?
I pity her with all that washing up she has to Do. It's all very well cooking for the 5000 when your on your own or perhaps with a. Friend
,but your the one left with all the dishes and that amount of chaos looks like it would have used up quite a bit. In the words of Simon " it's a NO from me."
,but your the one left with all the dishes and that amount of chaos looks like it would have used up quite a bit. In the words of Simon " it's a NO from me."Do you think JM is a bad omen? Everything she touches turns to sh*t? She's like King Midas in reverse. No sooner has JM thrilled us with her courgette recipe, than the Daily Mail reports about crops of killer courgettes. Now, I always thought that consumption of one of JM's meals could necessitate your close proximity to a lavatory, but killer courgettes? Which innocent item of food will she put the hex on next?
www.dailymail.co.uk
You could be eating killer courgettes
Mike Andrews, from Wetwang in East Yorkshire, told how he fell ill within hours of swallowing just a single mouthful of home-grown, cooked courgette.
And the lemon
Exactly. It's only a couple of weeks back when I recognised some hors d'oeuvre type of thing she photographed which was just stuff bought from a supermarket deli. Small stuffed red peppers - that type of thing. She didn't make them. Quelle surprise.
Alright? Tender, innit. Strewth, those hand-prodded beans had a quick transit time!
The comparison made me think of this:
(Left - original, Right - JM's version)
Yes absolutely xHer followers are so OTT aren't they?
I laughed way too much at this (but can’t seem to react with the laughing emoji. I think this one is also quite good, Jack’s obviously being the left
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What is “ooft” meant to convey, do we think. To me, it is something like when someone bangs into you with a trolley at the supermarket. It’s not a pleasurable thing.
Yerwhat?? Mushrooms are full of water, boiling them will just add yet more water. If you then fry them, you will get a pan awash with mushroom water. None of this is very enticing.
To me "ooft" is the sound coming from Jack's bowels after eating her own cooking.
I know . Weird. That’s why mushrooms should be wiped clean, if need be before cooking as opposed to washing them otherwise they go soggyWhat is “ooft” meant to convey, do we think. To me, it is something like when someone bangs into you with a trolley at the supermarket. It’s not a pleasurable thing.
Yerwhat?? Mushrooms are full of water, boiling them will just add yet more water. If you then fry them, you will get a pan awash with mushroom water. None of this is very enticing.
From her 'mushroom rogan josh' recipe from last November...
Mentioning her 'drafty flat' (how she can even call it a flat I do not know), hating food (she 'glowered' at the veg in her fridge), and taking to Twitter with a poll.... some thing never change eh?
Also... the thought of taking a whole pan of curry to eat in bed
And she goes on to say it was 'so delicious that I had it cold for breakfast this morning, smeared on toast'
Mentioning her 'drafty flat' (how she can even call it a flat I do not know), hating food (she 'glowered' at the veg in her fridge), and taking to Twitter with a poll.... some thing never change eh?
Also... the thought of taking a whole pan of curry to eat in bed
And she goes on to say it was 'so delicious that I had it cold for breakfast this morning, smeared on toast' 
Runber bands Southend
I hope she has a decent toothbrush tbh, reading about that breakfast makes me want to nip out of bed and brush mineFrom her 'mushroom rogan josh' recipe from last November...
View attachment 227309
View attachment 227308
Mentioning her 'drafty flat' (how she can even call it a flat I do not know), hating food (she 'glowered' at the veg in her fridge), and taking to Twitter with a poll.... some thing never change eh?
Also... the thought of taking a whole pan of curry to eat in bed
I can never hear this song without thinking of a frustrated Whoopi Goldberg shouting ‘Mick, Mick, Mick! Speak ENGLISH!’
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