Even by her standards the thought of white chocolate raw garlic mushroom pasta is just vile. There's a reason white chocolate doesn't tend to appear with garlic in recipes...
Jack Monroe #574 She's definitely lying about something
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I had to look this up but Pretty please can this be the next thread title as she will have another roast potato level of chaos!
As Mavis just brilliantly observed, there’s not one thing in that recipe that sounds like it works apart from the instructions on how to cook the pasta, which she probably took from the back of the packet. Has she even actually cooked this abomination, or is it just some maverick pixie brain fart that she’s convinced sounds sufficiently cheffy?
That pasta dish doesn't sound too bad until you get to the white chocolateView attachment 2952530
Contrary to what she said the Guardian and in the Divavid, Jack only LIED that she tried to seduce Leggy with sex pasta!
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It wasn’t carbonaaaaraa, but a BIG BUTCH DINNER that most definitely put the Oh Mon Dieu, Non! in
View attachment 2952548View attachment 2952549Unfathomably, the Butch Bolognon looks even worse in black and white
View attachment 2952558NON
BOLOGNON
Faced with a leftover hunk of beef last night to stretch between two grown women with fairly healthy appetites, I started making bolognese, changed my mind and wanted bourgignon, and changed it bac...web.archive.org
This was right as they were getting together/immediately engaged/guest was moving in, so Leggy could have been awarded sex pasta, because guest was on a full on loveboming lobster tail and Madeira-filled cosplay complete lie about being a bon vivant gourmand and proper chef just like Legster.
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In a nanosecond’s fit of wisdom amongst all the foolishness that saw her get engaged to and move Jack into her house within days of meeting her, fortunately for Allegra, she had the good sense to pretend she didn’t like white chocolateView attachment 2952575which saved her from this cream, old botulism mushroom and Milky Bar monstrosity.Should you want to recreate any of these dishes for your own Tory former lovers, they can (unbelievably!) be found in her second cookbook. Only know this cos after finding that in her old archives, I searched for Bolognon to see if we knew about it and it appears once only across all 575+ guest-related threads, in the Slopalong recipe listings hereView attachment 2952565View attachment 2952566View attachment 2952567View attachment 2952568no, we most certainly do not want to hear about your radiator peel, gravy granule and Caramac trifles, THANKYOU.
HEADRUSH SPAGHETTI
Traditionally, on Valentines Days gone by, I would knock up a pan of tagliatelle with a slow-cooked chilli and tomato sauce, hand torn basil and parsley, a few finely chopped olives and two lobster...web.archive.org
Slopalong: Cooking with Jack Monroe
Oh such a high standard has already been set! Truly the most hilarious corner of the internet :Dtattle.life
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what in the worldETA only with properly roasted garlic and actual dried mushrooms and in fact nothing about the recipe sounds good because it's all done wrong!
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This one would be Slopalong Boss Level - anyone feeling brave???
She sounds like me taking antihostamines. They do no agree with me at all.
That would be a great charity fundraiser. It's cruel just to slop that out for no good reason
Thank(space)you dearDon't worry, tenderstem, thereaction is aimed at Jack, not you.
I’m extorting
I’m extorting completely
I’m bleeping extorting
This is extorting
Sheer Extortion
Going to to ground. I’ve been extorting
EXTORTING!
I’m extorting completely
I’m bleeping extorting
This is extorting
Sheer Extortion
Going to to ground. I’ve been extorting
EXTORTING!
Someone's surely tried headrush spaghetti as slopalong?! If yes: please link. If no: one of you masochistic freaks GET ON IT.
I have a bachelorette kitchen (ie tiny) and a boyfriend who I don't want to LEAVE me.
I have a bachelorette kitchen (ie tiny) and a boyfriend who I don't want to LEAVE me.
So is this from Feb 2014 (have only just seen it at the top of those two recipe horrors) when she was still lovebombing the duck out of Ol’ Legster.
BOLOGNON
Faced with a leftover hunk of beef last night to stretch between two grown women with fairly healthy appetites, I started making bolognese, changed my mind and wanted bourgignon, and changed it bac...
web.archive.org
FFS Leggy, what were you THINKING?! Poor Legster. Two minutes to get her into the big London townhouse, another 18 months (plus 6 on top of that) to get her and all her tit out.
Ever so often I forget what a sanctimonious bleep Jack can be (to be fair she isn't always sanctimonious)The ss in the spoiler are from 2018, so too long ago for it to be what you’re thinking of, but maybe it was the another day when she came back to “have a chat about Israel/Palestine/Gaza”.
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It isn’t about her, though. She’s just a metaphorView attachment 2952630View attachment 2952621View attachment 2952622View attachment 2952623View attachment 2952624View attachment 2952625
(you need premium/a paid subscription to see the rest, but we’ve prob all seen more than enough already).
Thread by @BootstrapCook on Thread Reader App
@BootstrapCook: Hi. I can't stand by any more and not say something. I have a large public platform and I try to use it for good. But what good is all the rest of the 'good'...staging.threadreaderapp.com
This is Jack who uses cabal as an insult.
MrSpellyB is going to visit his Maman soon so I'll be home alone for a couple of weeks. But even with a back-up pizza in the freezer amd Doordash on speed-dial, I have fear at trying that "recipe".
I see this was before TD called her out …So is this from Feb 2014 (have only just seen it at the top of those two recipe horrors) when she was still lovebombing the duck out of Ol’ Legster.
View attachment 2952994
BOLOGNON
Faced with a leftover hunk of beef last night to stretch between two grown women with fairly healthy appetites, I started making bolognese, changed my mind and wanted bourgignon, and changed it bac...
FFS Leggy, what were you THINKING?! Poor Legster. Two minutes to get her into the big London townhouse, another 18 months (plus 6 on top of that) to get her and all her tit out.
Thank you dearest tendernaanI know you don't need me to tell you this, but you absolutely 100% definitely are good enough to complete a degree in psychology. Honestly the fact that you wrote this post alone demonstrates that you have all the skills required in terms of writing and analytical thinking etc . I hope it all continues to go well
this is actually such a good idea for guest. politics themed recipes. Green party cucumber and mint summer cold soup. Tory party blueberry tart. Labour party the same as the Tory one but with some red jam on top to try to look different. Lib dem custard tarts in the classic diamond shape. Etc etc. a nice project to keep her busy
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Oh my god. I've heard of the stab vest but I hadn't realised just how eye wateringly cringe it was. She bought one! The cops didn't give her one because there was a serious threat but she had to be there because she was MLK or whoever she thought she was that week. She ordered one online!
I've had a very quick look at prices and I'm betting she spent over £100 quid on it too. Probably more like 200+ if she got one she thought was "sexy as hell"
(Although her idea of sexy being that grey sports bra, maybe not)
Anyway I wonder where it is now. Maybe she donated it to the trussell trust. Maybe she still wears it every day.
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Maybe I shall celebrate by buying myself a stab vest, as I’m going to a flower festival in my area at the weekend. Thanks for the best prices!!
I worry about the people who might try to use an empty glass bottle or a teacup as a replacement for a mortar and pestle. At least the shards of glass/china would add some texture I suppose.
^ and flavour. The other ingredients won't.
Fixed it!So is this from Feb 2014 (have only just seen it at the top of those two recipe horrors) when she was still lovebombing the duck out of Ol’ Legster.
View attachment 2952994
BOLOGNON
Faced with a leftover hunk of beef last night to stretch between two grown women with fairly healthy appetites, I started making bolognese, changed my mind and wanted bourgignon, and changed it bac...
FFS Leggy, what were you THINKING?! Poor Legster. Two minutes to get her into the big London townhouse, another 18 months (plus 6 on top of that) to get her and all her tit out.
Much better.
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I think Leggy was just as bad as her tbh. The way they described each other and their relationship even in the middle of it has more red flags than F1.So is this from Feb 2014 (have only just seen it at the top of those two recipe horrors) when she was still lovebombing the duck out of Ol’ Legster.
View attachment 2952994
BOLOGNON
Faced with a leftover hunk of beef last night to stretch between two grown women with fairly healthy appetites, I started making bolognese, changed my mind and wanted bourgignon, and changed it bac...
FFS Leggy, what were you THINKING?! Poor Legster. Two minutes to get her into the big London townhouse, another 18 months (plus 6 on top of that) to get her and all her tit out.
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