Jack Monroe #56 I, Jack Monroe

[FeelingGroovy]

I am grunkaing along about 5 hours behind and I’m so fucking angry. She’s shaking the begging bowl and claiming burnout?!?!

There are NHS staff and shop workers etc etc who have worked non-stop for the last 4 months who have earned the right to say that. I’m no key worker, but my work went NUTS since lockdown and I’ve had the sum total of 4 days off since February outside of weekends, and have literally been working til midnight for the last 3 weeks. I’m knackered but I’m fucking *lucky* because I have a job unlike so many. She is a profligate waster of money, and grubbing for handouts when she spunked money on a trip up to Edinburgh is just fucking outrageous.

She’s a fucking fraud.

 

[Tabitha D]

She says she is going to do a lot of things. This will be just another failure to deliver. Besides, can you imagine her verbose flowery style working for crime? Actually it might be entertaining. But also, surely no crime, no matter how heinous can be worse than Jackie's life experiences.

I dunno. Maybe she could write a book about crimes against food. She’d have plenty of expertise to draw upon.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

I’m pretty much finished Grunka’ing which is a good job as my rage levels are insane right now!

The fact she is taking money from people who themselves can’t afford to feed themselves is just abhorrent, so much so I can’t get my head around it.

I’ve been thinking about it and can understand it from the Jackolytes point of view, they don’t have Tattle and a lot of people on Twitter are going to take things at face value - and one thing Jack is so very good at is controlling the conversation around her and either setting the hounds or blocking someone who steps out of line. So all they see is this poor little urchin, on the verge of a breakdown/burn out and can’t put the pieces together and so donate.

I think one day, you know when an innocent tweet just goes viral? I think someone is going to make some sort of thread of tweets with receipts outlining what Jack has done and it’ll go viral. Her own narcissism and need to be seen as this downtrodden little scamp will be her downfall.

How she contradicts herself so much and gets away with it I’ll never know, but I feel on edge reading the thread and what she’s doing. She’s one of the worst con artists out there.

Now fuck off.

 

[Pocahontas]

That frigging ode to potatoes makes me think of Adrian Mole even more. He actually did become a tv chef at one point, cooking offal. And went on holiday by mistake to Russia so probably could have written ‘potatoes’. ‘Do you weep, Ms Rees-Mogg? Do you weep?’

Brilliant!!! Also:

Louisa!
I adore ya.
I implore ye
Don’t ignore me.

 

[PoorPatrol]

Is she just going to keep referring to Potatoes as though it’s just known by that now, just one word and the world knows, like Madonna?

 

[Breakdance Badass]

Hi Fraus, I’ve been BUSY, have I missed much? Wa ha ha... joking! Fuck me I’ve been catching up and just when you think she can’t go any lower, she does! Anyone who donates to her is stupid. Plain old stupid, if they care enough to donate they surely must have seen her swanning around Edinburgh, skooshing lavender sleep spray from the sleeper train and handing our melamine forks (other reusable materials are available)for her Bolorneaise. She’s NOT poor!!!!

 

[Pocahontas]

View attachment 199600She’s only retweeted Nigella’s plug. No ‘dear heart’ yet. Maybe even shameless Jack feels guilty about it now. Ha.

‘Rendered with majestic eloquence’??
‘Work of art’ ??
Fuck’s sake Nigella

 

[Veronicaaa]

What I really don’t understand in the midst of all of the lies is where is the money from the alleged best sellers??

SHE'S HOARDING IT IN HER 'BUYING A BIG HOUSE OUTRIGHT IN ONE OF THE MOST EXPENSIVE PARTS OF THE UK' FUND.
I don't mean to sound like a dick and I know everyone means well with their suggestions on how to get herself out of this terrible trap she's got herself into, but it's all a LIE! She's financially FINE! You're all just too nice, and taking her at her word. But ...

 

[MrsOgre]

 

[ShowMeYourFeline]

Jack thoughts of the day:

Regarding her alleged £2000 open house sale, I don’t fucking believe her. People who are doing their utmost to clear out their homes would be absolutely blessed to make £200 at a proper boot or garage sale. Let alone the awkwardness of trying to attract customers into your actual home. No one would turn up, and if they did, there wouldn’t be £2000 worth to sell. If there was, like most boot sale sellers, it would be a miracle if she sold 5% of her goods. People don’t want most of the things you have. Finally, there is no way that people would be vulture-like enough to be stripping her home if things that don’t look like goods to sell. (Finally finally, not to mention she’s recently claimed she lived on the 12th floor of a tower block with broken lifts! Who’s going to bother entering a private block of flats and trudge up 12 flights of stairs to view someone’s useless junk?)

———————————

Regarding her writing, it occurred to me that her language shows that her essays/posts/whatever are aimed at fellow middle class people, from the perspective of a middle class person.

Firstly, impoverished people don’t need to be told what being impoverished is like because they already know. Her writing is to inform the middle class.

Secondly, there is no linguistic sign that she truly sees working class people as her own. Her language feels like from the outside looking in.

She never talks *to* working class or impoverished people, and never uses “we” “our”, or describes shared experiences that are relatable to working class people. (With this last point, she sometimes intends to, but they are so unrealistic and dramatic that it’s obviously all about her being the poorest and putting on a poverty display for middle class people).

She doesn’t describe any community experiences of similar poverty, as if she was the only one going through it. Which would make sense if she had no working class friends or community.

Third, the way she describes her poverty experience is as if she found it utterly shocking, which would only make sense if she’d never experienced anything like it before, as would be the case for a middle class person. It reads like a middle class person describing their shock and horror at once dipping a toe into peasantry.

 

[Mokie]

Laurence ‘Lozza’ Fox is another one with his begging bowl PayPal/patreon details on his Twitter. I’m sometimes tempted to send a penny with the message ‘GET A PROPER JOB you entitled twat’. Similarly to Jack, he’s made himself unemployable, why should anyone be expected to subsidise them? Do they think they’re above working 37 hours a week to pay the bills?

 

[Silver Linings]

Jack’s face at the fraus not falling for her shit.

ETA - shit that’s enormous! Soz for the printer ink, Jack. Another expense for you!

 

[live laugh loathe]

Torn (as ever) between feeling deeply uncomfortable at watching someone appear to unravel publicly in real time and being seriously fucked off that she’s pulling this AGAIN.

Like many others on this thread I share many of the experiences jack claims to have had. I’m a former boozehound with almost four years’ sobriety under my belt - by far the biggest achievement of my life. And I had burnout last year and was signed off work for two months. It was fucking DREADFUL. I’m still recovering. I usually really welcome ‘public figures’ speaking openly about their experiences of mental health struggles etc but with her it just feels like a kick in the gut. I never begged for money while I was unable to get out of bed in the morning. I didn’t have the headspace to contemplate showering, let alone asking for help.

shes totally shameless.

 

[lilamay]

Charming.

 

[Pocahontas]

Cabal, I’ll have you know (although, fuck off for being so intrusive) that there were many serious offers on my Cotswold Co. dining table to ghostwrite JM’s crime novel. But, because I’m a maverick <insert Tom Cruise gif where the sun don’t shine> I have done my own show. This chaos is FREE content (so you should feel fucking guilty, but also extremely lucky for letting your eyeballs anywhere near it without tapping my Tip Jar because I give ALL of my work away for FREE to Tattlers who are in dire need of piss-taking). The rest will be available on my Patreon: search ‘Pimp My Cotswold Co. Crib, Fools’.

Spoiler: The Curious Case of the Rinsed Beans

Plucky, tattooed Very-Special Constable Mack John-Row dipped a wedge of cheese in melted Marmite butter, snarfed it like a great big greedy goblin and sighed. Being a vegan is ball-breakingly tough.

But not as tough as trying to resolve this latest case. The DI had been in touch regarding a howling, floor-clawing case. John-Row, never knowingly under-stan’d, had dealt with far bigger, much more media-friendly stuff than this. But this case was curious.

The witness statement described a potentially lucrative celebrity chef and poverty campaigner career being cast into The Thames and left to drown.

There were 1000s of witnesses schmoozing in fancy riverside spots with their agents, but no evidence on Twitter. Can tweets, pondered Mack John-Row puffing on a cigar of rinsed beans, be deleted?

[TBC....]

‘Who are you?’ asked Pocahontas.
‘No-one of consequence,’ replied Bookweevil.
‘I must know,’ replied Pocahontas.
‘Get used to disappointment,’ replied Bookweevil.

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

I expect VERY triggering posts are coming soon.

 

[Miss Anne Thrope]

I did wonder if Louisa was contributing to the rental and how she would manage the whole burden. Turns out the answer was to cast logic to the wind and splurge on a sleeper train and an aparthotel in Edinburgh for four/5 (or according to her, 6) days. The muppet.

Full moon's nearly here, I think she's gearing up for a doozy of a performance.

 

[crystaleyesd]

Coming in here after being away for 3 days like...



On the night train (FANCY - although not quite the sleeper) with a cabin to myself, a bottle of wine, and several hours to grunka!

 

[Effie22]

And another!

 

[antisocialmedia]

When I am in reading form, I can read a decent sized book in about two days. It means I often read into the wee hours and wake up before the kids. I am not a massive telly fan so I read instead( in my child free, housework free evenings)
Disclaimer
all reading is completed fully clothed.

Before children I could read 5 books a week because I used to stay up til 3am

I now have children and Tattle so I read nothing