Jack Monroe #468 Remove my photo! Warned!

[Valiofthedolls]

Is this the one where she says that carrots taste the same as sweet potatoes in a recipe? I tried out that tip and they DON'T. I also bought loads and loads of those jif lemon things, to my embarrassment. Currently using them to clean the toilet with. I squirt them around the rim. Do not use this tip unacknowledged. WARNED.

She’s said that a few times. Carrots being a cheap replacement for FANCY PANTS sweet potatoes and all

Private Site

She also “invented” the Quarterhack (aka shopping list split into four) for A Girl Called Jack (below from 2015 on her blog). She just waited to invent that stupid bleeping name for it til Grifty Kitchen

Behold the four major food groups: PROTEIN, CARBS, FRUIT AND VEG and STORECUPBOARD.

ETA: GROUNDBREAKING NEWS FROM JACK

(also, a well is a sort of hole and for the love of Greenbelt DO NOT PUT METAL IN THE MICROWAVE)

 

[Jelly Bean]

Not got round to watching this one yet, but I thought the same about her greenbelt thing. Before she starts talking about how she tried to unalive herself she makes a series of tit jokes and like slightly pauses for the audience to laugh and then when no one does, starts cracking up herself. It’s so awkward

It's cringe isn't it
Her little self deprecating jokes that fall flat.

Just watched another snippet of the Edinburgh talk. I didn't realise that as well as Jack visiting 20 poor areas for the VBI (I thought it was 10?) she is also looking at rural areas which only have a corner shop. This part of her research will be presented as a secondary piece of work to the VBI. She apparently does a lot of work with Scottish rural communities too.
She really is Walter Mitty isn't she? Just none of this is true.

 

[Fruitjack]

We should be getting an update on the shout out for families who want to go shopping with Jack soon, surely? Maybe it’ll be in one of this week’s 4 blog posts.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

make up your bleeping mind, you snippy twit.

Spoiler

1 Nov I AM NOT SINGLE

15th Nov. FIERCELY PRIVATE. Despite what I said two weeks ago I AM NOW SINGLE but don’t need to RUN TO GLOSSY MAGAZINES about it.

HOW DARE a GLOSSY MAGAZINE not know I, fiercely private Jack Monroe, am SINGLE?!

But while I’ve got your attention, look how wonderful they say I am!

 

[BenignNarcissist]

Attention Canal:

Did Jack claim to push someone out of the way on EU Referendum night to watch a particular result come in?

Because so did a Guardian writer....

The Groucho Club wants younger members? During a cost of living crisis? Good luck with that | Marie Le Conte | The Guardian

Is Jack also Marie Le Conte?

Makes you think...

 

[PoorPatrol]

So in

make up your bleeping mind, you snippy twit.

Spoiler

1 Nov I AM NOT SINGLE
View attachment 1909441

15th Nov. FIERCELY PRIVATE. Despite what I said two weeks ago I AM NOW SINGLE but don’t need to RUN TO GLOSSY MAGAZINES about it.
View attachment 1909450View attachment 1909451

HOW DARE a GLOSSY MAGAZINE not know I, fiercely private Jack Monroe, am SINGLE?!
View attachment 1909457But while I’ve got your attention, look how wonderful they say I am!
View attachment 1909455

So in 2013 the year of stealing food to survive and descent into prostitution, she was engaged to be married? I wonder if her fiancée minded about the whole brothel sitch Was fiancée also starving or were they hoofing and scarfing in front of a frozen, skeletal, sex worker Jack?

 

[Valiofthedolls]

We should be getting an update on the shout out for families who want to go shopping with Jack soon, surely? Maybe it’ll be in one of this week’s 4 blog posts.

She probably decided it was against her stringent moral barometer.

No wonder the grifting bint is always on the bleeping beg if her “moral barometer” means that she takes jobs without even bothering to ask how much they’re going to pay, or even if they’re going to bother paying her at all.

PS CAROLE MALONE IS AWAY

 

[Fruitjack]

She probably decided it was against her stringent moral barometer.

View attachment 1909465

No wonder the grifting bint is always on the bleeping beg if her “moral barometer” means that she takes jobs without even bothering to ask how much they’re going to pay, or even if they’re going to bother paying her at all.

PS CAROLE MALONE IS AWAY

Would kill to see her stand in on Eat Well for Less and GREG(G) WALLACE IS AWAY

 

[Valiofthedolls]

So in

So in 2013 the year of stealing food to survive and descent into prostitution, she was engaged to be married? I wonder if her fiancée minded about the whole brothel sitch Was fiancée also starving or were they hoofing and scarfing in front of a frozen, skeletal, sex worker Jack?

Her fiancée was PoPo. If you’re not familiar with it, 2013 Shoeburyness was exactly like 1970s Times Square. Jack met her PoPo fiancée when Essex “Prostitution to Survive” Squad did a sting operation and bundled the hookers into the wagon to take them all Downtown.

Fortunately PoPo lady recognized Plucky Jack was a tart with a heart from a very good family and not a Jeremy Kyle loving scunge.

The rest, as they say, is history (and by history I mean the bright lights of London called to our plucky pixie and she was soon Pretty Womaning it the duck up in Leggy’s big house)

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

Apologies for where this lands, I'm doing a sneaky work time grunk and THIS from a JM spam meatball-supporting squig just made me quake with laughter

 

[Whaa?]

Didn't she say that some people saved £150 per week when following her tips? When she appeared on Thrifty Cooking in the Doctor's Kitchen with Dr Rupy? No, I am not watching it again. I do remember she asked Dr Rupy if he was after her job .

 

[Mr Krabs]

Would kill to see her stand in on Eat Well for Less and GREG(G) WALLACE IS AWAY

Would like to see Jack on Eat Well for Less because the people they find on there might actually be more gormless than she is. “This is the Smiths and they spend £50,000 a week on groceries. Mum will often do a full weeks shop and then throw it straight in the bin just for fun. Dad doesn’t know how to turn the oven on and will order takeaways for breakfast before burning £50 notes to keep warm. Can our team of experts save them money?”

 

[Emmapism]

I really wish she had worked with Love Productions. They're toxic AF apparently so it would be a match made in heaven. I went there for an interview about 10 years ago and very much did not like the vibes. A year or so later I heard that what I was picking up on was very correct.

 

[Jelly Bean]

Didn't she say that some people saved £150 per week when following her tips? When she appeared on Thrifty Cooking in the Doctor's Kitchen with Dr Rupy? No, I am not watching it again. I do remember she asked Dr Rupy if he was after her job .

I suppose if you eat her recipes and are subsequently hospitalised you do save on household food and electricity bills. That's probably what she meant

 

[SweetTransvestite]

So in

So in 2013 the year of stealing food to survive and descent into prostitution, she was engaged to be married? I wonder if her fiancée minded about the whole brothel sitch Was fiancée also starving or were they hoofing and scarfing in front of a frozen, skeletal, sex worker Jack?

Look lads, sorry for the I'm not a monster but come the duck on, it's all just relentless bollocks isn't it? Just imagine living like this..lurching from one panicked lie after another, forgetting what you've elevenerife'd the last time someone threw a few quid your way, just to have the last word.
Dr Dr Faustus levels of pointless, desperate nonsense all to be the hero/victim in your own web of lies? What a terrible way to live.

 

[ForgettyBetty]

Rage nana defending Jack’s recipes
Eta Just saw Diane had posted but I swear that post wasn't there before lol

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Rage nana defending Jack’s recipes
Eta Just saw Diane had posted but I swear that post wasn't there before lol

Hi Jack!

 

[MavisBeacon]

Well this would just be the perfect You Know What...

It's boggling to see all her lies and exaggerations laid out like this. Virtually nothing adds up, except the fact that she honestly doesn't spend enough money on tattoos...

 

[DianeAbbotsMojito]

On her 2016 AMA (ask me anything) on the other unnamed site she claims she “falls in love with women, sets up home with them, gets joint bank accounts, makes love all weekend” (), gets off with “the odd bloke every now and then”.

Then there’s this 2016 gem, she’s so very pleased with her pithy wit that she’s repeated it several times

View attachment 1909267

Hate to break it to you Jack but that's not being a lesbian. Sorry, babe.

Also, I always considered that veganism/lesbianism quote to be bait to keep the clammy weirdos interested. If she said "Nope, I'm a bona fide, card carrying lesbian and I'm not interested in pursuing men" they'd not spend every waking hour creepily tweeting her. She knows what she's doing, the crafty betch. And the worst thing is all of the neckbeards will be thinking "yes, it's me. I'll be the dick to make a temporary turn worth it"

And with that, I've just put myself off my afternoon biscuits.

 

[Lucy Aeroplane]

Dr Dr Faustus levels of pointless, desperate nonsense all to be the hero/victim in your own web of lies

I personally think this would make a wonderful thread title.