Jack Monroe #424 She’s as Greek as Prince William

[Lazarus]

I’m preparing for the Lazarus pesto as if I were preparing for a dream-job interview.
I keep looking at the blog post. Jack said the recipe makes two jars; she demonstrates this by adding two photos. The photos are the same jar. She’s added the same picture, with the same jar, same sticker with the same writing and same dirty mark on the sticker.
I SHANT do this:

Ingredients (made two decent sized jars):

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Frau Susie speaks

 

[colouredlines]

I'm sticking with the theory that Jack didn't get confused about numbers, she just lied.

My evidence, although circumstantial, is compelling: Jack is a lying liar who lies all the time.

 

[jenny2603]

Thought the exact same thing.

It also looks like a food offering from the latest iteration of Burglar Bill.

Kebab Kev takes the stage.

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

Sorry for upsetting you but its not rocket science. Anatomically contrary, how so? What is the right way to have sex?

This is not a thread to talk about sex. It’s not homophobic to be unaware that fisting is popular among lesbians either.

 

[Slop n slide]

Ahhhh watching gogglebox with my sisters and THAT MAN’S £1 show popped up. One sister said ‘isn’t this encroaching on that Jack Monroe person’s thing? Weird, I’ve not seen anything from her for ages’ (sister is lefty as they come but never been on bird app).

Reader. I set her straight immediately on grifting, Tory undertones and frankly stomach churning, offensive recipes. Small victory, but those small facts were enough for her to agree that she sounds like a total grifter. ‘Good thing she’s fading into obscurity then’ were her words.

I sipped my beer and smiled. No further discussion needed.

Might write a poem about it later xx

 

[Geetbo]

Christ, I hope I never get Molly as an enemy.

 

[Dogmuck]

Morning Ninnies - I know I’ve been sworn off talking about LJC BUT I think this observation is relevant enough to drag her out from retirement.
So 9 hours ago on IG LJC posted a lovely photo of herself and Steph (of pack lunch and bad business news on wake up to moany on radio 4 then on BBC telly box) celebrating 40 years of channel 4. Two beautiful lesbians glammed up and clearly very happy. Also 9 hours ago Mx Monroe posted her, I’m still standing, better than I’ve ever been, looking like a true survivor… “life beyond our wildest dreams” snogging and here’s a photo of my kebab IG post. If Jack had been out snogging/dating would she not have treated us to a selfie of herself all facetuned to fk glammed up, showing how happy she is with accompanying word salad about her amazing life and love etc etc? For me that post is a reply to LJC…makes you think

Versus

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Ah, a continuity (x2) work denim boiler suit spotted in the wild! Now we can see for ourselves exactly how they get -destroyed- by the nature of her work being a twat in an expensive chair
View attachment 1702887View attachment 1702888
Also, she’s so blatantly cosplaying her DEAD immigrant landlord grandfather (with one pair of shoes) in that pic. It’s…odd.

Spoiler

View attachment 1702890View attachment 1702891
View attachment 1702895
View attachment 1702896

Lol to ‘an instant hot water tap before it was cool’ (elsewhere in this interminable thread waxes lyrical about when she was SB’s age, so allegedly in the mid 1990s, before hot water taps were cool). #1948 Truther.

Also, clearly the role model for thrift given that “the story” is he came over with one pair of shoes and even when owning properties decades later she implies he still had just the one pair. #NotVimesBoots

She certainly seems to put her dad and grandad on a pedestal doesn't she? Never a mention of her nan (who isn't dead) and only really mentions her mum when she wants to use her disabilities to score points. Makes you think.

Morning you sloppy lot

 

[Geetbo]

Why kitchen pong?
Slopalong.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

She can't evidence overall takings and a timestamped donation which marries up to the demonstrated amount raised. She doesn't have it.

If this were a genuine error (I forgot to close the fundraiser, I was waiting for the final 30 days to lapse so I could donate in one lump sum, I honestly forgot) she could have cleared this up months ago and done what she'd promised with evidence. She could have owned her mistakes if there were ones. Instead she's spitefully digging a hole, one rusty spoonful of slop at a time. She's long missed the opportunity to admit there was an honest mistake. If she can't evidence a dated donation with proof that that was all that was raised, she shouldn't have lied about donating it.

I sincerely hope actionfraud are on the case because it is looking more and more like a crime was committed by the day. If she wants the backlash to stop she needs to provide proof of takings and a dated donation transaction.

Even if she doesn’t provide it publicly, pretty sure Action Fraud will be asking for it…

Whoever is advising her on reputation cleanup is doing a shit job. “Ok Jack, you said multiple times in the summer that the money Teemill paid into your personal PayPal had gone to charities (plural) you refused to name. So, provide evidence from your Bank Account of money going to a lone charity (singular) who accept donations via PayPal. Oh, and when writing your mea culpa apology, make sure you fill it with excuses and how none of it is your fault. Then wait an hour or two, then plug your new book”.

“What’s that? Patreon? Yeah, when you do that mea culpa, just use your Kickstarter list of excuses, make sure you call it a “small amount” of money, and yes, DEFINITELY post a photo of you fulfilling some rewards that demonstrates conclusively that you lied when you said most people were only giving you a quid”

“Pardon? Oh, yes, DEFINITELY make sure there’s a £1,000 laptop in it when you claimed 3 months ago to the day that you were writing job applications on your mobile phone while sitting in solar lit gloom and boiling soap to make shower gel. Make sure it’s front and centre in the picture, maybe with an expensive notebook next to it to show everyone how contrite you are.”

“Ok, finally, post a tweet almost solely consisting of lies you’ve told that can be easily refuted and disproved by your own published words. How about being expelled, being working class and being a single mother again? Eviction? Not enough characters. Just stick to the first three whoppers. That all should restore you to your former grift glory. Now, let’s talk about this bridge I have to sell to you…”

 

[Valiofthedolls]

She probably thinks she's so unique and fabulous people should fall over themselves for the opportunity to look after her. Dream on, mate.

Hmmm you may be onto something there

Spoiler

And

And

And

And

And

And

And

And

 

[witchofwestbyfleet]

Oh mercy, Jack's autobiography is coming out next year?

A Girl Called Slop: Chapter 1
I grew up in a shoe box in Southend, my family an exotic blend of Cypriot, Scots, Norn Irish, and Pitsea. Lest you think that sounds a bit white, I remind you that one of the waifs we graciously gave an extra bit of room at the table for 15 years is Black. This absolves me of all racial insensitivity forever. My grandfather was a penniless immigrant who came to the UK with nothing but the clothes on his back and a lunchbox full of homemade dolmades. He remained penniless until his untimely death at the age of 75. My mother was also a poor immigrant, and my dad was a firefighter. I've seen a lot of fucking fires.

 

[HaveTinCanRattle]

Guten tag, frauen. I'm back from my slopalong challenge. I only wasted 120g long grain rice, 3 tbsp peanut butter, some caster sugar and 150ml or so of milk (plus broccoli for garnish, obvs).

Can you imagine if those ingredients mattered to you and you were placing some kind of faith in her depressipes (not quite TM)?

It was a hoot doing it, but now I'm just cross. And if I ever read the words "scant teaspoon" again, there will be consequences. WARNED.

Send doggos.

 

[Cornelia Hosendove]

Wow, that’s tragic. Are you allowed to recycle your celeb blurbs over and over? Will that Nigella quote appear on every single one of Jack’s future books?

Publishing folks will know more about this but I recall a hoo hah involving an author local to me (red triangle!) who had a 'this is a marvellous book by a marvellous writer' quote splashed across the cover of his latest by a hugely famous successful author who I believe was with same publisher. I think there was some social media cock up where famous successful writer posted lovely supportive pic of the latest book saying 'can't wait to read this!' & observant followers said 'err, you've not already read this then???' Turns out quote was from a review of previous book ( with a very small print disclaimer stating this is 'praise for previous book' ) & that this is total common practice & not seen as unacceptable or misleading.
Bit long winded that but point is I bet neither Mom or Jay has set eyes on the Thrify Grifty Kitchen book.

 

[AyiaKnacker]

It looks like all the slopalong places have been taken. Oh no. How sad. I’ll just hold your hair back the coats, yeah?

 

[ScarlettOHaha]

That’s an interesting way of putting it. I didn’t think of it like that.

However, Allegra is so posh, it might just be that “bit gauche darling” is her equivalent of “you can’t say that!” That’s how it comes across to me, anyway. I think that’s just the way Allegra talks, and that’s the sort of language she uses, as formal as it sounds to my ears.

I dunno, maybe I’m giving her too much credit. I’m not sure she meant to be condescending either. It’s just her vibe, as discussed yesterday.

As a lesbian myself, I’d be mortified if a girlfriend of mine mentioned fisting INFRONT of a group of people who weren’t very close lesbian friends. Jack did it on tv. It was crass and embarrassing and I think Allegra tried to cover her embarrassment with the gauche comment.
Yes she’s posh and they seem a rather unlikely couple, but tbh it’s hard to find a partner in our tiny dating pool, and I and most of my friends have made disastrous choices!
I imagine that once Jack moved in and Allegra realised how blooming narcissistic and unstable she was, and how that would impact her own child, she was scrabbling to find a way to get rid of her fast.
It was very silly to cohabit so soon with children involved but very stereotypically lesbian.
I am sure Allegra had a lucky escape.

 

[terfette]

I’d really love for her to be called out on the illness cosplaying but realise that’s probably difficult as there is no way of knowing that at least some of them are real. From memory, she’s suffered from:-

- Autism
- ADHD
- A heart condition
- Chronic depression
- Anxiety disorder
- An unspecified eating disorder
- An unspecified disability
- Ehlers Danlos Syndrome
- insomnia
- PTSD
- Alcoholism
- Some ailment that renders walking with a cane necessary (a cane that has since disappeared into the ether)
- Rheumatoid arthritis
- “Suspected osteo” - does she mean arthritis or osteoporosis. Could be both. Could be neither.
- Long covid
- A frozen shoulder
- Multiple bouts of laringitis
- Multiple chest infections
- Multiple temperatures
- Multiple bouts of Bronchitis
- Crumbling teeth “from the poverty induced malnutrition”
- Bones grinding to dust from the HARD WORK!
- Breadcrumbing CANCER
- Benign tumours on her back
- Almost fatal anaphylactic shock
- Unspecified allergies
- Inter-sex / hermaphroditism
- Something weird with her labia (SORRY GUYS!)

She’s an absolute munchie.

Your teeth don’t crumble from a year or so of bad diet! I say that as someone who wears a top denture because mine actually, literally crumbled to bits one day, and if she were such a campaigner, this is definitely something she’d talk about more.
I’m jacks age. The reason my teeth went bad are because I have body dysmorphia and an eating disorder. I’ve never forced myself to be sick, but due to malnourishment I would often get things like kidney infections and struggle to get immunity to bugs I’d get repeatedly through winter (I had winter vomitting bug six times one winter). The acid from being sick a lot, plus doing things like using bleach and other corrosive substances on my teeth caused it. And it took around ten years and three pregnancies. Then one day I banged my mouth on a fence as I ducked under it (not hard, there was no mark, my lip wasn’t even thick from it) and the front ones just crumbled.
being in your 30s having to wear a denture has such a profound effect on your mental health, your confidence etc. I haven’t worked since because I can’t bare the thought of being around people still. I’m currently very unwell with an infection, I’m unable to wear my denture and this caused me to refuse to seek medical treatment until I was passed out and my partner rang on my behalf despite my occasional stirring protests.

fortunately my partner earns good money, we live in a decent house with no mortgage and he supports me and looks after me a lot. Which leads me to another point about jacks behaviour - I am so grateful to my partner for that. I would NEVER call him from work unless it was a serious medical emergency, if I have a bad mental day, I stay my ass in bed and waitfor him to come to me.

if Jack had really experienced this, it’d be something she could really use for good.
As usual tho it’s just LIES.

 

[SmolWarrior]

Her latest sock, which I discovered less than 12 hours ago, is gone after about 45 tweets, a lot of them aimed at Molly. Called out by others who asked how an account that joined in November 22 and only followed some football players suddenly stumbled across Molly’s blog and decided to have a go at her.

It’s so blatant (and it has been with other socks too, like that one with the profile pic of the man in glasses that Fraus found on a reverse image search); I genuinely think some part of her is cracked mentally and she can’t keep herself from mithering on Twitter.

 

[moldwarp]

I think so too. It would get old as fuck very quickly your adult partner expecting you to indulge them like Spoiled Bastard from Viz.

View attachment 1705111
and
View attachment 1705113

I would LOVE to have a good old chat with Rosamund Urwin (she’s the one who also wrote the great “not my circus not my monkeys” article too). Pretty sure she has plenty of “thoughts” on Ol Bullshitter

I once touched Michael Fassbender’s chest — and I’m still a

Austerity blogger Jack Monroe and chef Allegra McEvedy tell Rosamund Urwin about falling in love, their political ambitions and raising a family

www.standard.co.uk

Her later article for anyone who missed it. SHADE!!!

Jack Monroe on why she's adding 'politician' to her CV

Writer and cook Jack Monroe has turned politician, standing as an independent. She talks Labour’s future, the PM’s punk wardrobe and dating with Rosamund Urwin

www.standard.co.uk

Yeah, Rosamund Urwin was definitely throwing quiet shade. Actually she didn’t even have to do that. Just quoting Jacks words without any editorialising at all is more than enough to show what a narc she is.

I mean Allegra, whatever you think of her, and her privilege, undoubtedly trained and worked incredibly hard to become a chef at the level she’s at. So for Jack to say, in a major newspaper, that her cooking is indistinguishable from Allegra’s, is incredibly insulting. It’d be like me doing a year of night classes in anatomy and then breezing into an operating theatre, pushing the cardiothoracic surgeon aside and saying “Allow me, my good man, I shall do this heart transplant! nO oNe wIlL bE aBlE tO tELL tHe DiFfErEnCe”