Jack Monroe #411 More flounces than an 80s wedding dress.

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House of Carbonara

House of Carbonara

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hoopdedoo

hoopdedoo

Re the archived story that @Valiofthedolls found - "I don't approach recipes like other people do" may be one of the few accurate things JM has ever said in an interview 🤣
 
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heretic

heretic

It’s been a whole day and I’ve still got…

“Welcome to a whistle-stop tour of bleeping up everything,
Welcome to a week in the life of me,
Don’t fasten your seatbelt, turn your head or close your eyes,
If you’ve got any shred of decency you’ll see a crooked house and you’ll be horrified”

…in my head.

Her poetry has got
"Excalibur" by David Brent

I froze your tears and made a dagger
and stabbed it in my cock forever.
It stays there like Excalibur.
Are you my Arthur? Say you are.

Take this cool dark steeled blade,
steal it, sheathe it in your lake.
I'd drown with you to be together.
Must you breathe? 'Cause I need heaven.
 
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Helena Handbasket

Helena Handbasket

heretic said:
It’s been a whole day and I’ve still got…

“Welcome to a whistle-stop tour of bleeping up everything,
Welcome to a week in the life of me,
Don’t fasten your seatbelt, turn your head or close your eyes,
If you’ve got any shred of decency you’ll see a crooked house and you’ll be horrified”

…in my head.

Her poetry has got
"Excalibur" by David Brent

I froze your tears and made a dagger
and stabbed it in my cock forever.
It stays there like Excalibur.
Are you my Arthur? Say you are.

Take this cool dark steeled blade,
steal it, sheathe it in your lake.
I'd drown with you to be together.
Must you breathe? 'Cause I need heaven.
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Ah I’d forgotten about that DB poem!! 😂😂😂
 
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Valiofthedolls

Valiofthedolls

Helena Handbasket said:
‘The loss of my double-D’s’ is just awful. Crass and unnecessary. So although breasts shouldn’t define you, they matter enough to point out to everyone you’ve got knockers? Silly girl Jack. Oh wait-you were a grown woman and a parent when you said this? Oh dear.
Jack you are absolutely the worst.
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I mean, I get that they can change size, but this was only around 6 months after that other article, so she can’t even keep the story of her bap size straight. Or she was even more crass in that daily mail article because “double Ds” sounded better to her than “my 38Es”

80A06C11-C7D6-4DB7-A733-D4A1BB54933A.jpeg
 
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Nurseali

Nurseali

House of Carbonara said:
Exactly! Why the drama I-am-in-the-process-of-writing-it? It's not bloody Shakespeare, mate. Either share it, or keep quiet.
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Reminds me of those random statements on Facebook people put
"I am so depressed". " What an awful day" Followed by 20 people asking why and being worried and no reply from original poster
BLOCKED... Not even WARNED
 
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hoopdedoo

hoopdedoo

miss_terious said:
who adds hard boiled eggs to macaroni and cheese???
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If the mac and cheese has hard boiled eggs, bacon-stuffed rolls, and tomatoes on top of it, why even bother with the mac and cheese? The toppings are a meal in themselves. Probably enough to feed two hungry adults and a teenage boy ;)
 
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Snotbuster

Snotbuster

Valiofthedolls said:
It’s really very telling that every single time she’s compared to something, from a potato to a dictator, I always think “Hmmm, that’s actually a bit unfair on potatoes/dictators/(and here)15 year old boys…” 😂
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WTFDidIJustSee said:
I was that grey at 29, 7 years later I’m still not fully grey, around the 70% mark.

Can confirm, permanent box dye doesn’t cover them for more than 2 weeks, even the salon dye doesn’t last more than a month. I embraced it.

She hasn’t, so she’s either at the salon very regularly or doing it herself very regularly.
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Yep natural grey hair is very hard to color. It doesn't hold color well at all--even a pro job doesn't last. So, hitting the salon after the dog grooming cafe or buying a shitload of Lady Clairol.
 
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Snotbuster

Snotbuster

MavisBeacon said:
I think the most egregious thing about that article is that the author talks about "Monroe's work", as if she'd done anything more than a back of the envelope calculation, a bunch of moany tweets, and a beg for old receipts. She made a point,an observation, which wasn't even original or surprising to economists. It's hardly "work".
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Clearly written before the ONS' response to an info request. Thoughts of Monroe are not central to any economic discourse except her own. As in how to get that cheddah.
 
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AlwightDallin

AlwightDallin

After a day of caring for my dear 80 year old dad, cramming in some work, 70 miles drive home, pick up kids, cook their tea I was EXHAUSTED but with 30+ pages to catch up on here I had to order Chinese. You’re indirectly ruining my diet CAN’T I HAVE JUST ONE NICE THING but luckily Mr A did the laundry and I’ve managed to catch up.

That macaroni looks rank. Love how she’s trying to gloss over Mollygate by making new slops. Her recipe coming soon list is getting longer by the day. Just taking a photo of some random foods thrown together does not make you a cook, and with no costings either for the poors it’s… just a photo of your tea. If the bar is so low then everyone on insta is a cook send cashos!

Also if we can’t see the ham then it’s swimming in the gloop like pink worms 😭
 
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F

FrumpyCat

Mr Krabs said:
They moved in together incredibly quickly. I think it was days before she moved to London, SB in tow. Engagement announcements were in May of that year, and they’d split by October. Then Jack moved back to Southend and complained that SB didn’t have a school place nearby, because well, she’d been dragging the poor kid from place to place. I’m not sure how long the romance lasted in total.

I dunno. I know Allegra is a bit of a tit person but I wouldn’t blame her for Jack’s ridiculousness. The age gap would have made things difficult to begin with, especially since Allegra was already an established name and Jack was just a budget blogger. There’s plenty of evidence that Jack was an entitled bleep long before the days of Leggy and her media crew, and it’s not like Jack was some smol little 19 year old with big dreams. She was 27 and had a kid. Most people in that situation would have been much more sensible.

And did Jack ever milk the Leggy break up. The fake heart attacks and moving to a sad widdle draughty cold flat (which was actually gorgeous and a 2 bed overlooking the sea).
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I think Jack and Leggy split up in the summer. Jack was going on about her son not having a school place for 4 months - nearly two of these were end of term/ summer holidays.

If course Jack is responsible for her behaviour, but wtf was Leggy thinking of - letting a stranger move in to her house. If she had posted on the other place to say an I being unreasonable to let my partner of two days move in to the house I share with my preschool child, she would have got a good kicking.
 
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TheDragonWithAFlagon

TheDragonWithAFlagon

Justacatindisguise said:
Found the full OFSTED report from the year she sat her GCSEs. She did double science.

View attachment 1628400
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Core subjects - English, English Lit, Maths, RS, probably a language (so they had a bacc equivalent), two sciences - and then five options to get them up to 10/11 with a couple being taken in Year 10 (popular at the time). might have done a three year KS4, too. And she didn't even get five full passes She really didn't lift a finger for the entire period.
 
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Lucky Escape

Lucky Escape

Valiofthedolls said:
I mean, I get that they can change size, but this was only around 6 months after that other article, so she can’t even keep the story of her bap size straight. Or she was even more crass in that daily mail article because “double Ds” sounded better to her than “my 38Es”

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5'1" and 38E bra size. Is she actually Dolly Parton?
 
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FrankReagan

FrankReagan

Valiofthedolls said:
I mean, I get that they can change size, but this was only around 6 months after that other article, so she can’t even keep the story of her bap size straight. Or she was even more crass in that daily mail article because “double Ds” sounded better to her than “my 38Es”

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Bra sizes are interchangeable x

Lucky Escape said:
5'1" and 38E bra size. Is she actually Dolly Parton?
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FBAE9EBA-768C-4898-8796-ADF5793F59A1.gif
 
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