Jack Monroe #411 More flounces than an 80s wedding dress.

[terfette]

This was the early 90's and my eldest daughter failed her GCSE's very badly 10 years ago for the same reason, but was allowed to join the sixth form in a new school when we moved house after meeting with the head of year, who saw her potential. If Jack was diagnosed "gifted and talented", surely the school would have let her stay on?

I was kicked out of secondary school in year 10. At the governors meeting, the head of key stage 4 begged the governors to let me sit my GCSEs early, he said he knew I’d pass with high grades. I have never heard of this happening, and it didn’t (governors refused, my behaviour in the meeting didn’t help, as I was an absolute twit) Like you, I’m not gifted, I just got high marks. If a school knows you will get those grades, they will bend over backwards to get you in that exam room. I imagine jack got some high marks in her SATs and has exaggerated that heavily. Not a chance would they refuse someone they thought was “gifted”.

I thought she claimed to have been kicked out of school though? Can anyone clear this up for me (as much as any of her contradictions can be cleared up).

 

[Orphan_Black]

I honestly haven't felt the same since seeing chiz on tiz and now I have to come to terms with pork boning tool as well. Is it any wonder I'm traumatised?

Don't forget the de-gloved sausages. Mmmmmm.

 

[NellieBoo]

I'm just catching up on a few pages so apologises if this has been mentioned but wasn't the green eggs and ham bake or whatever it is a recipe of that post-it wall of recipes she posted ages ago? I'm sure it was. She said she had soooooo many recipes to choose from for her book. I can't remember what book as Grifty Kitchen has taken 84 years.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Monroe was with Allegra when she started exploring a trans identity. Allegra would have complained about losing her partner's tits, not because she is transphobic but because she is attracted to people with tits. I 100% believe Monroe was talking about Allegra at that time then attempted to backtrack and muddy the waters a bit which is par for the course with her. She runs her mouth off.

Mystery older policelady was suspected, purely because it was pre-Allegra and that’s the only previous girlfriend we knew of

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

Mystery older policelady was suspected

That was years before Jack started exploring taking T and came out as trans

 

[Boyo]

I was kicked out of secondary school in year 10. At the governors meeting, the head of key stage 4 begged the governors to let me sit my GCSEs early, he said he knew I’d pass with high grades. I have never heard of this happening, and it didn’t (governors refused, my behaviour in the meeting didn’t help, as I was an absolute twit) Like you, I’m not gifted, I just got high marks. If a school knows you will get those grades, they will bend over backwards to get you in that exam room. I imagine jack got some high marks in her SATs and has exaggerated that heavily. Not a chance would they refuse someone they thought was “gifted”.

I thought she claimed to have been kicked out of school though? Can anyone clear this up for me (as much as any of her contradictions can be cleared up).

I seem to recall she got kicked out for smuggling out (or in?) a scalpel. There are multiple versions of the story floating about though. Centuries from now, scholars will say ‘Never mind whether Oedipus actually shagged his mother or just married her, does anyone have a conclusive answer for Jack Monroe’s school exclusion??’

 

[threetintender]

Thankspaceyou so much, I've picked one up for 99p (don't think it's the full collection but I'll start small as I don't read very often).

Was this introduction written about Lucia, or Jack Monroe?

Outrageously pretentious, hypocritical and snobbish, Queen Lucia Ludicrous, ‘as by right divine’ rules over the toy kingdom of ‘Riseholme’ based on the Cotswold Essex village of Broadway Sarfend. Her long-suffering husband Pepino Squig is ‘her prince-consort’, the outrageously camp Georgie Squig is her ‘gentleman-in-waiting’, the village green Twitter is her ‘parliament’, and her subjects squigs, such as Daisy Quantock Space Squig, are hapless would-be ‘Bolsheviks’. In Lucia Ludicrous in London, the prudish erm..., manically ambitious Lucia launches herself into the louche world of London society. Her earnest determination to learn all about insert herself into ‘modern movements’ makes her the perfect comic vehicle for Benson’s Tattle's free-wheeling satire of salon social media society, and of the dominant fads and movements of the 1920s 2020s, including vegetarianism, yoga, palmistry, Freudianism, séances, Post-Impressionist art, shite cooking and Christian Science.

Makes you think!

ENJOY!

 

[Clarends]

The Bookseller promotion of Grifty Kitchen on Twitter, calling Jack a national treasure.
A squig replied "Read the room".

At the Sloppies I think there should be a read the room award, or fingers in ears award, for media/journalists pretending that nothing has changed.

 

[Justacatindisguise]

I seem to recall she got kicked out for smuggling out (or in?) a scalpel. There are multiple versions of the story floating about though. Centuries from now, scholars will say ‘Never mind whether Oedipus actually shagged his mother or just married her, does anyone have a conclusive answer for Jack Monroe’s school exclusion??’

Someone who was (allegedly) at school with her popped in recently and said the scalpel thing was true but as it was the end of year 11 they didn't officially kick her out. Then she fucked her GCSEs and wouldn't have got into sixth form anyway.

Jack Monroe #361 The only person thats suffered has been, uh, me

Is there an opposite to imposter syndrome and if so I think she has it. I recall in a previous thread she was quoted saying, think it was following the London Bridge attack and she was living with LJC, “ we both went to work”. Now I can easily imagine the head of a national news organisation...

tattle.life

 

[Jumpstart]

I would imagine Jack took her GCSEs. Didn’t pass very many and only scraped through on the ones she got. She didn’t therefore have good enough grades to go onto the sixth form and A levels, which is where Westcliff High takes in girls from other schools to do their A levels. I went to Westcliff girls and did my A levels there

 

[Helena Handbasket]

She’s a virtual campaigner

In that she does virtually no campaigning?

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

“I like breasts, babe” is oft attributed to Leggy however it’s apparently an earlier partner (Jack seems to have blown up two relationships in the same way) because Jack revealed this in the trans/Allegra breakup phase, it’s been attributed to poor Allegra.

Some Frau will have a receipt, but I made this same connection back in the mists of the canal and it was disproven.

You’re right though, the timing does sort of breadcrumb Leggy - everyone seems to assume it’s her.

It’s also reductive - what makes you a woman/you/my partner is tits, nothing more. What sort of partner would say that?

Daily Mail link:

SEBASTIAN SHAKESPEARE: Foodie Jack splits as she switches sex

Former Sainsbury’s pin-up girl and queen of austerity cuisine Jack Monroe has seen things go off the boil in her love life after calling off her engagement to chef and food writer Allegra McEvedy.

www.dailymail.co.uk

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Monroe was with Allegra when she started exploring a trans identity. Allegra would have complained about losing her partner's tits, not because she is transphobic but because she is attracted to people with tits. I 100% believe Monroe was talking about Allegra at that time then attempted to backtrack and muddy the waters a bit which is par for the course with her. She runs her mouth off.

I agree with this. She says stuff and then remembers that people can go and ask Allegra - same with the sadfishing post she did about the Burberry studded leather jacket and 'an ex' telling her she wasn't butch enough for it. Sounded exactly like something Leggy would say too, lol

 

[YenE]

View attachment 1627896
A new slop! Another recipe in progress! Another insistence on telling us how many people are (supposedly) in her household!

Recipe in progress - That should be the name of her new book. Imagine a beautifully bound book filled with pictures of food - no recipes just vague promises of one day.
Chapters include “I’ll ping it over when I go downstairs” and “Here’s my riff on…”

 

[Helena Handbasket]

I mean, if we are being really vulgar, just by evidence in her own words posted here in the past 24 hours she’s told us WARNED GRIM 1. that as she herself is one, “nice girls” cook minging pancakes with courgettes rather than doing something else with the courgettes, and 2. that when you are living destitute in the endless dark and cold with a two year old and two free hands, you must write poetry rather than knock one out in front of them.
.
She’s silly, immature, crass, largely talentless, completely lacking in any sort of self-awareness, and a total and utter embarrassment to herself. (CONFIRMED). DO BETTER, JACK. If you’re even capable of it, that is.

PS to Tonkinson, you are NOT HELPING HER with your ridiculous enabling.

Oh LJC. I knew about 1 which was gross enough and even worse that it’s the blurb for a recipe I a published book. The shame. I did not know about 2 which is frankly just cringe-making. She’s got absolutely no class as at all.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

View attachment 1628280

SEBASTIAN SHAKESPEARE: Foodie Jack splits as she switches sex

Former Sainsbury’s pin-up girl and queen of austerity cuisine Jack Monroe has seen things go off the boil in her love life after calling off her engagement to chef and food writer Allegra McEvedy.

www.dailymail.co.uk

This is Jack retconning. It was Allegra

 

[Helena Handbasket]

I was thinking about this the other day. She constantly seems to be chasing that world and deludedly thinking she’s entitled to be part of it. It also coincides with the time she was at her peak ‘fame-wise’ and then her star began to wane.

It’s quite sad and pathetic really, especially when you consider she’s done/had little to no personal growth in the best part of the last 10 years she’s been in the public eye. I draw the line before I get to feeling sorry for her though, given that her sense of entitlement entails not actually earning the money to live her deluded facsimile of that sort of life surrounded by expensive sideboards and hoards of crappy-looking tat. Oh, and also blaming everyone but herself for the unenviable situation she finds herself in both personally and professionally.

I know Leggy got expelled from St. Paul’s Girl’s, so was wondering if Jack’s preposterous tale of being expelled* from her school pre-dated Leggy, because call me cynical, but I would guess not.

(*rather than the far less ‘edgy’ not having enough GCSEs to come back for A Levels which she admits to elsewhere in her writing/interviews)

Yes I’ve been pondering this when Leggy comes up-what shocks me most is that Jack had a taste of that world and misses and hankers for it, rather than congratulating herself for escaping a life of pretentious middle-class tedium.

 

[Switchstreetz]

It's utterly bizarre to me how much she compartmentalises the social media websites - you look at Twitter and the vibes are "'im taking a break from the hateful internet ARE YOU HAPPY TROLLS" but over on insta she's posting macaroni and cheese

She definitely has a social media addiction - she barely uses insta except when she's not on twitter, it's like she just needs to fill the void with something

 

[NellieBoo]

I seem to recall she got kicked out for smuggling out (or in?) a scalpel. There are multiple versions of the story floating about though. Centuries from now, scholars will say ‘Never mind whether Oedipus actually shagged his mother or just married her, does anyone have a conclusive answer for Jack Monroe’s school exclusion??’

I'm sure she's said that she got kicked out of school but didn't tell her parents? . How the duck did that happen? Oh wait...

 

[Mr Krabs]

View attachment 1628280

SEBASTIAN SHAKESPEARE: Foodie Jack splits as she switches sex

Former Sainsbury’s pin-up girl and queen of austerity cuisine Jack Monroe has seen things go off the boil in her love life after calling off her engagement to chef and food writer Allegra McEvedy.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Presumably, Tits Fiancée (as she’ll be known as going forward) would have been pre-Leggy. So Jack went into the relationship with a lesbian who sent her oyster clitorises, while still exploring a trans identity. I feel that’s something you should tell your partner before you book the moving van and take her down Harvester.

Their relationship sounds absolutely mental and exhausting. Jack must have been like a pig in tit with her new fancy London house and the media connections. I bet once the honeymoon period wore off that went downhill fast.