Jack Monroe #411 More flounces than an 80s wedding dress.

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I've been enjoying Jacket Potato's "so poor" jokes. It reminded me of the cheapskate dad thing (maybe in Viz ? Or a standup routine? ) "Action Man Deserter"

I googled him earlier since his bio said to and he was the circus handyman, not a performer 🤣
He made all the sawdust for the big top
 
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I would honestly love a pair of fleece lined crocs. No, I am not a cool mum. But yes, I will be a comfy mum. (But also crocs ARE cool and duck off anyone who says otherwise).
My daughter's second favourite new fact is that you can eat crocs. I think they'd probably be nicer than Jack slop tbh
 
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There's one FM I found and, again, I am confounded by the complaint. Squig was trying to get twitter to remove the parody account. Apparently parody is OK but lord help the world if someone is "snide." Is this an English thing, to demonize snide or does this person have a seriously messed up set of priorities? See below:
bleeping lunatics these people. Smdh and laughing in a mildly drunken yet overtired manner.
Snide and parody, such a fine line...only the intiated will stand a chance of getting it
 
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I googled him earlier since his bio said to and he was the circus handyman, not a performer 🤣
Maybe he could construct Jack a collapsing clown car to commemorate the end of her career and get one of his mates in costume to get her a pair of big clown shoes.
 
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Unfortunately and terribly for her she seems to have been every status possible, she’s already allegedly disabled, she’s already been a victim of abuse (I’m not for a second saying people don’t act in certain ways due to past trauma but she has a lot of previous with inventing her backstory and it’s hard to believe her just because she says so). She’s allegedly already had death threats, been driven to SH, an ‘addict’ of some nature, in recovery for an ED, has long covid, is still struggling financially, works 100 hr weeks and has recently experienced quick onset & diagnosis stress related laryngitis.
She also had an infected gland. It was deliriously painful.
 
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Aside from her obvious issues with not having access to the only knife she ever uses, these days seem to be her happiest when you look back on her IG.
Leggy broke her heart.
Also, Leggy saw the warning signs and got tf out of there but I do think she messed with Jack's head big time. Brought her (and SB) in to her world of upper class riches very prematurely, gave her so many experiences she would never have had a sniff of otherwise and then cast her out.

Anyway, I was looking for hospital pics and came across this, that stopped me dead for a second
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Why is she cutting raw beetroot into cubes? I’m not an expert but usually you cook a beetroot whole to prevent the colour bleeding out. You wouldn’t want raw beetroot in cubes either, you’d normally use it grated. I know the answer to this already, don’t I? She can’t cook.
Also, raw beetroots aren’t that tough. Try cutting a swede or a large squash Jack, you massive fanny.
 
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Thank space you, I’ll bear that in mind, luckily I look a dick in any type of hat (according to Mr A) and I’d rather wear the bitey sort of croc tbqhwy but I have been considering buying a pergola and it’s a slippery slope isn’t it 😭

Given Jack has de deactivated I’ll bet she’s writing 0 book, spending 0 time with SB, she’s furiously rage scrolling and trying to think of The Big Excuse to justify her behaviour (or at least distract everyone). Unfortunately and terribly for her she seems to have been every status possible, she’s already allegedly disabled, she’s already been a victim of abuse (I’m not for a second saying people don’t act in certain ways due to past trauma but she has a lot of previous with inventing her backstory and it’s hard to believe her just because she says so). She’s allegedly already had death threats, been driven to SH, an ‘addict’ of some nature, in recovery for an ED, has long covid, is still struggling financially, works 100 hr weeks and has recently experienced quick onset & diagnosis stress related laryngitis.

I don’t know what else she can say.
may I bring up the cancer scare? My personal aneurysm
 
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I find it hilarious JM tried moving to Instagram but her follower count remained 175k on there so she hasn't bothered anymore because she didn't get the surge she expected after flouncing, her followers have dropped off on Twitter and become quieter in defending her on there, next book hasn't had any promotion....... yet her parody is going from strength to strength.
 
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Maybe he could construct Jack a collapsing clown car to commemorate the end of her career and get one of his mates in costume to get her a pair of big clown shoes.
If not she can probably just find them in a puddle.
 
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Maybe I am just having a more-confused-than-usual day, but.....how can this work? A ring pull isn't sturdy enough to hold up anything heavier than a camisole or a scarf, i.e. if 99.999% of what hangs in most people's closets was hung on it, it would all fall down.
Do you need a visual guide?

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Coming from behind, but I think someone has taken Jacks Twitter from her - changed the password or something so she can’t log in, because there’s no way Lightning Thumbs McNarc would be able to resist sending her thick AF FMs all over the Mocking Squigs, and that whoever’s got it deleted the Tweet sharing the parody account, because she would NEVER do that as she enjoys the chaos too much.
 
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