Jack Monroe #392 This is why ppl cook you on that gossip app innit

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GrannyOgg

And the half spoilered part 2
 
Reactions: 22

RinsingHoops

Haven’t grunked yet so sorry if already spotted, but could she be softly, gently trolling us?
 
Reactions: 19

Switchstreetz

Dogmuck said:
Is the lodgers name BellenD?
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Not Billy (we hope!)
People-huv-tae-know said:
Also isn't James Dyson a Tory Brexit loving arsehole who cut jobs and or wages? I could be confusing him with someone else though. But if not then Jack is endorsing a fellow crony.
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Correct, but since when has jack let her supposed morals prevent her spending habit

A dog that has chewed through two hoover wires in such a short space of time is a dog who is not being looked after - I'm hoping this is Jack bullshitting because the alternative is a lonely and bored golden doodle left unsupervised for too long too often, and Content could eat something harmful or end up electrocuted.

Oh and nice, of course she has SB hoovering while he's round. How filthy would a room have to be before a 12 year old boy decides to switch on the hoover unprompted and start tidying up. Remember when she said he was mowing the lawn for fun as well? And that video where she's heard sitting on her arse telling SB to pick something up that's right next to her? I'm surprised she hasn't got him writing her recipe books for her yet, or handling the patreon postcards.

Maybe he could do a better job tbh. Ugh, she really is just the worst hope the prunes make her suffer tbh
 
Reactions: 56

Beansbeans

HotesTilaire said:
Yeah she does this, means she’s grunked what I said about rechargeable stick Hoover’s. Did she buy it in wilko?
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Does she include the grunking in her 100 hour working week?

Because I often do 70 ish hour weeks and those weeks definitely don't have time for twitter let alone grunking on tattle/insanely drawn out "decluttering" or long performative trips to the supermarket...
 
Reactions: 27

People-huv-tae-know

Griftymcgriftface said:
Sorry I am 8 pages behind but why is she serving raw pastry pies?
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It's her way of dealing with enemies. Then she feeds the pies to her pumble overlord.

I put Jack and pumble into an AI. The results are terrifying. Also does 'Jack' not look a like she was crossed with that wee fella with a skinny cock who also happens not to be a murderer?



 
Reactions: 82

Mrsoverall

HotesTilaire said:
Yeah she does this, means she’s grunked what I said about rechargeable stick Hoover’s. Did she buy it in wilko?
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Ooo has anyone seen the news about the new Henry Hoover Quick? Am desperate for one but can't afford it. Send King Charles poundios

All I've Ever Wanted said:
Sounds like a Victorian mourning dish.
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There could be a Whitby jet carving of it to wear as a vile brooch

 
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People-huv-tae-know

This is what you get if you type in 'Jack Monroe is a liar and a cunt'. I think the AI is trying to show us her real face post booze, cigs and and pre facetune and botox.

Clearly a Celery town pic


Male aesthetic era


Tory MP business Jack


Kumquat era



Also because I'm very angry at how Jack has treated previous pets, particularly guinea pigs and rabbits, here is what 'Jack Monroe being eaten by guinea pigs and rabbits' looks like. These bunny piggy hybrids look well 'ard and clearly take no shit. They are pissed af that Jack tastes of slop.

* The above is not a death threat, just fantasy fiction, like what Jack writes.




Monty Python's killer rabbit ain't got nothin on these guys.

OT, @GrannyOgg , you have done wonderful work. Seeing all those tweets arranged chronologically really exposes Jack's grift, blatant begging and her policing of Twitter. This situation is in need of more scrutiny from squigs and officials alike.
 
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kachoochoo

I'm still awake and still thinking about those pies

realised what they were reminding me of



didn't the dog in this one think they'd swallowed the patty pan?

makes u think
 
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That Forensic Man

https://giphy.com/xULW8N9O5WD32L5052

There is something of an element of David Firth in these though, creator of Salad Fingers, lover of rusty spoons... hmm
 
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Mrs Peel

Right then.

Jack, if you are reading this, and I know you are...

How the fuck did you allow Content to chew through a hoover wire? It isn't something that takes 2 minutes. It's a long chew. Hoover wires also contain copper, so if she ingested even a small part then it could get lodged in her intestines.

But whatever, eh? She should have been trained by now not to chew things, and when you leave her on multiple occasions there should be nothing in the vicinity that could cause her harm.

You have been lucky up until now, but the next wire she chews could be live.

Think on.
 
Reactions: 74

kachoochoo

honestly, i think that poor bloke is an acquaintance of hers who was just being polite to let her get a pic

no doubt she's getting rings sorted now

burger boy who?
 
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hollowhusk


I do understand double meanings but a lot of it has had to be taught to me if that makes sense.

I suppose it depends on a lot of factors, those more seriously disabled by autism may not have the same insights into their behaviour as someone more high functioning.

I also don't believe for a second that Jack is autistic, her back stories make no sense and she doesn't seem to have any autistic traits and a lot of her behaviour is the opposite of autistic traits.
 
Reactions: 37

Malkiavelli

And her ceaseless claim to be “working 120 hour weeks”, or the similar claim re. Yesterday, that she works until “3AM” - how can she keep on saying it when there’s absolutely zero output? It’s maddening to the point of fascination. No book (still), she doesn’t write, say, a regular column, no recipes and no Patreon output. No regular tv work. In fact, when she does get gigs she finds it incredibly easy to drop this never ending stream of work and to suddenly start working similarly long hours on the tv production - so what happens to this ‘work’ that there’s absolutely no evidence of. It was funny also to read her older tweet the other day about needing to sleep for mammoth stretches (16 hours was it?) after covid … how the fuck is that possible?

She’s been making the working all hours claim for years even though it’s clear from her Twitter usage that she does almost no work, yet she brazenly makes the claim to a live audience - and this from some who claims herself incapable of telling a lie.

What she is, above all other things, is a fantasist - she’s told the lie so many times that in her mind it’s fact, and she is no longer capable of separating fact from fiction. You gotta wonder how much of this fantasy world applies to the rest of her life, and the bold claims she makes.
 
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Jemadah

Silly fraus - of course Content didn't really chew the two hoover cords. That's just her latest version of "I found it in a puddle" / "they accidentally delivered two sofas and let me keep the extra one" to try and justify why she bought a new, expensive vacuum cleaner whilst simultaneously boiling soap to make shower gel. Jack, you're so boring and predictable with your lies. Grow up.
 
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Helatruralhome

No it's likely the dysphasia she sadly referred to- substitute: 'expensive vacuum brand' for 'hard brush' everytime Jack uses the brand- vacuums aren't for poors clearly and the extra exercise is also good for keeping warm too- go well, pal
 
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Cashio e pepe

And don't forget the Russell & Bromley loafers that someone accidentally left at her house then said she could keep
 
Reactions: 38
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