Jack Monroe #392 This is why ppl cook you on that gossip app innit

[Brian Butterfield]

Call off the dogs, Jack's just using Patreon the way it's meant to be used.

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BUT YOU DON'T CREATE ANYTHING YOU FUCKING GREAT WALLOPER.

 

[hooplifehero]

Just a small and trivial point.
“there’s a pie with your name on it. Autistic = incredibly literal”

but this isn’t an example of being incredibly literal is it? It’s knowingly making a play on words. It’s (if it even happened) a self-aware joke, not thinking that if you say “there’s a pie with your name on it” it has to have a name on it, cause you’re autistic and don’t understand idiomatic phrases.

I don’t want to diagnose anyone online and I don’t know a great deal about autism but I am not autistic as far as I know, and I might feasibly, jokingly text someone “there’s a pie with your name on it” if it literally had their name on it, because I’d see it as a pun around the idiom (the pie is meant for you) and the unusual reality (it actually does have your name in pastry)

my point is that this doesn’t seem an autistic thing at all?

 

[Lazarus]

This is how you know Jack is middle class. Imagine what would be said about a working class woman who introduced new partners to her children at the drop of her drawers. The middle classes always get the benefit of the doubt.

See also: leaving your children in a Portuguese hotel room whilst you go out for tapas with your equally middle class friends of an evening versus leaving your child in a caravan at Butlins whilst you go to play bingo and eat sausage rolls with your pals.

 

[LavaFlake]

She's still pretty snippy

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If you're income relies on reliability I can see why you're having to boil soap hun x

 

[Moneypenny’sfreedom]

Ok everyone, Jack can now retire, these two accounts have got her entire workload covered.

 

[GrannyOgg]

Spoiler: Jack versus Lee Anderson, Martin Daubney, Lawrence Fox and a bloke called Pat

Let us defer to the Observer for a brief explanation of how Jack versus Lee Anderson, Martin Daubney, Laurence Fox and a bloke called Pat
…The row began after deputy leader of the Reclaim Party, Martin Daubney, posted a clip of an interview he had conducted with Anderson.
At the start of the clip, Daubney refers to Monroe as the “self-appointed representative of the impoverished”, adding she has “sold loads of books. Done quite well out of it. No doubt, probably earns more than the prime minister”. Anderson responds by stating: “She’s taking money off some of the most vulnerable people in society and making an absolute fortune on [sic] the back of people.”…
( Observer 15 May 2022)
Jack immediately leapt into action. At 5.25 on the 13th May she retweeted the offending video, tagging the lawyer who represented her when she successfully sued Katie Hopkins.

Interestingly, as I write this, the vile video with its career wrecking accusations is still on our heroines timeline, softly, gently ticking up views. All part of her cunning legal strategy I am sure.
At 18.02 Jack tweeted this. It was obvious she meant business.

Jack continued to tag her lawyer throughout the evening of the 13th, keeping him up to date with the fast moving situation

Not perhaps quite as often as she counted the number of views of the video

And she did make time to let us know this interesting fact

At 7.31 however our heroine seemed to become unsure whether her lawyer had the capacity to accommodate her and, possibly sensitive to the accusations laid against her, she added an important rider to her tweet. She would donate the cash if it wasn’t needed and anyone who couldn’t afford it was to donate. A huge relief to me in particular, mid month is always a difficult time.

Unfortunately, no doubt caught up in heat of the moment and keen to help the peoples poverty Princess, not everyone listened

We will take up the story later that night when Jack returned to our screens.

 

[Moneypenny’sfreedom]

No Jack, not sickly, self obsession yes, lying definitely, sickly no.
Her local chemists must love her, the shop profits are exclusively due to her imagination. The medicine cabinet must take up an entire room. SB must effectively be her carer for all her imagined and cosplay illnesses. I bet she‘ll outlive everyone, I’d be very surprised if his Dad is as relaxed and chilled about her parenting of SB as she makes out.


My husband has life limiting illness/ disease and takes fewer drugs than she’s described for a supposed sore throat, he MAKES NO FUSS or comment, quietly allows me to care for him… he can no longer walk unaided, uses an electric wheelchair, his hands and arms are slowly packing up as well, he’s not ‘old’. She actually rips the piss out of everyone with long term conditions. Sorry, but makes me so mad. Someone get this fucking grifter exposed for what she is

 

[overdueanadventure]

She's still pretty snippy

 

[PoorPatrol]

Just a small and trivial point.
“there’s a pie with your name on it. Autistic = incredibly literal”

but this isn’t an example of being incredibly literal is it? It’s knowingly making a play on words. It’s (if it even happened) a self-aware joke, not thinking that if you say “there’s a pie with your name on it” it has to have a name on it, cause you’re autistic and don’t understand idiomatic phrases.

I don’t want to diagnose anyone online and I don’t know a great deal about autism but I am not autistic as far as I know, and I might feasibly, jokingly text someone “there’s a pie with your name on it” if it literally had their name on it, because I’d see it as a pun around the idiom (the pie is meant for you) and the unusual reality (it actually does have your name in pastry)

my point is that this doesn’t seem an autistic thing at all?

I was just about to say this! Autistic people often take things literally, but it’s not a conscious thing that is pointed out when it’s happening. It falls within the rigidity side of the ‘triad of impairments’ used for autism diagnosis. She’s using a stereotype to reinforce her (IMO fake) diagnosis. I’ve never known a person with autism , to refer to their rigid thought processes while in the middle of doing something like she does.

The way literal thinking works is subconscious. It would be more likely to occur in a scenario where somebody says to a person with autism “I’ve got a pie here with your name on it” and they are then ~expecting~ a pie with their name literally on it. With someone who is ‘high functioning’ enough to dash here and there at a moments notice, has no routine, uses idioms and convoluted metaphors all day on Twitter - I would expect them to have learnt and filed away ‘with your name on it’ and not taken it literally. Especially in advance of saying it. Fucking hell what am I even trying to explain here?? I must be touched in the Pumble, she’s talking shit and I’m sitting here trying to explain why it’s shit. Maybe I am a sad little haus frau with nothing better to do on the Sabbath 🥹

 

[GrannyOgg]

Spoiler: The curious case of the disappearing law suit ( part 2)

Our intrepid heroine seems to have returned around 9.45. She immediately took aim at Martin Daubney.

She then discovered Lawrence Fox, cad that he is, had donated £5 to her appeal. She immediately donated his fiver to the Trussel Fund. Given that, it is perhaps not unreasonable to assume that is where all the unneeded donations went. They are a worthy cause close to Jacks heart ( see Tee Mill).

Fearing Daubney was unaware of who he was up against, Jack sensibly decided to enlighten him. Alas, Mr Daubney seemed unimpressed.

You’re wondering about Pat aren’t you? Wonder no longer…

Anything seemed possible on that exciting night

But there was a certain unhappiness brewing. Questions were beginning to be asked….

.. and not all of them from Lozza.

So by 23.07 Jack had deleted the tweet asking for donations to her PayPal account

By 1.12 pm Saturday 14th May, Jack was able to share with us that she had instructed her lawyer. Is poor Pat in included under “and co”? Surely not!

After this stern announcement, little was shared about the upcoming case until May 20, when Jack confirmed that lawyers letters had been fired off and public apologies demanded. The interesting bit is at around 11.02 although it’s all good. Jack tells Us all about her 120 hour week. It’s very moving.



Fortunately, given that I can find no apologies from any of the gentlemen named by Jack, by May 28th she had a crack team of paralegals on the case

So is there an ongoing lawsuit or have matters been quietly settled out of court?
Happily, from our point of view none of that matters, because as recently as August 26th, Jack tweeted this…

I can hardly contain my excitement to find out exactly how much money was donated to Jacks PayPal account that night. The Trussell fund must surely have received more than Lozzas fiver. Or perhaps the money went to some other, equally worthy, cause?
Just tell us Jack, you know you’re dying too and after all transparency isn’t just for tories,

 

[girl1980]

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

If I had the time I'd go back through every single thread and note down every Jaccident or bout of mysterious illness that coincided with either a work engagement or her being in hot water over something on Twitter.

I have a partial list for that lol

 

[Emmapism]

We all know the lodger's name is Borb. Short for Borbora.

 

[That Forensic Man]

I'm a shallow person to notice this but the kettle in the first link is an electric one. If you look closely you can see the cable, it's been plunked on top of the hob to look fancier.

Oh yeah the base is right there, what a twot

 

[jenny2603]

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then why are you begging for cash hun

Sorry to be all taxpayers money about things but why is the NHS spending money it can ill afford on having that gobshite address it's staff? Unless it's to give them an insight into Munchausen's syndrome I cannot think of anything Jack has to offer in a healthcare setting.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Call off the dogs, Jack's just using Patreon the way it's meant to be used.

 

[jenny2603]

BH’s (better half ) pie she hasn’t so much as pushed the pastry to the edges. Also not blind baked the pastry, so it’ll have a soggy bottom. Is it just me or do they look less like pies and more like little tartlets? They look about 7-8cms across and maybe 2cms deep…. Either way, the oversharing never fails to make me feel deeply uncomfortable. Poor SB. Constant new lovers in and out of his life and his home, it would be seen as disgusting if it was anyone else. Why does nobody who supports her pick up on this?

This is how you know Jack is middle class. Imagine what would be said about a working class woman who introduced new partners to her children at the drop of her drawers. The middle classes always get the benefit of the doubt.

 

[jenny2603]

She has shown us some of her milestone chips. Apparently she gave one to her son, which is very odd.

He squealed "thankyou bestest Mamapapa, I shall treasure this always and think fondly of all those times I saw you drunk and wondered if you you were still breathing. What fun we've had together in this mad life. I am the luckiest boy in the world. Now if you'll excuse me I'm off out to play with my hoop and stick"

 

[jenny2603]

Exactly. Whoever booked this needs to take a good look at themselves.

ETA- What a reply!

 

[Cucumberthunder]

So reliable.