Jack Monroe #361 The only person thats suffered has been, uh, me

[Onestorytoomany]

I wish she would quit.
For good.

The more we wish that the more she spite stays. I have gone with being

about her and taking the piss.

 

[ScouseGobsheet]

Underneath the bowl though...
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I went back to look at the bowl pic. HER HANDS. JeffinC. The Two Fat Ladies used to creep me out with their painted talons always diving into big bowls of mincemeat & seasoning to give them a good hard mashing. But at least the rest of their hands looked clean. Is this part of JM’s povvo cosplay, because the Jackals think all proles have hands calloused & grimy with toil and / or an inability to grasp basic hygiene, let alone afford soap & water? I would, sincerely, vomit my toes up if someone with filthy mitts like hers offered me food they’d made.

 

[jenny2603]

i am miles behind, i have missed both jack's breakfast appearance and tommy lee's wang

and i was just googling stuff and it came up with jack doin a that man recipe

(it's probably shown up here before, but, whatever)

She's actually not too bad there. I would even try that recipe (not convinced by rhubarb but strongly tempted by ginger). How has she managed to get worse in the course of her career?

 

[Fitnessqueen]

“Lower people’s energy bills, let the energy companies take the hit for a while, and then the govt intervene with sort of payments to the energy companies to tide it over and then when the energy prices come back up or they stabilise again then it turns out to be a self funding model”.
You what? What does that even mean?

 

[Onestorytoomany]

“Lower people’s energy bills, let the energy companies take the hit for a while, and then the govt intervene with sort of payments to the energy companies to tide it over and then when the energy prices come back up or they stabilise again then it turns out to be a self funding model”.
You what? What does that even mean?

Do you think she might be talking bollocks?

 

[Begborrowsteal]

Jesus the pupils on her too. Not a chance shes sober

 

[RevEd]

I know we had our vote and it's a laugh about Jack just not doing her recipe.

But how disgraceful is her disregard for others in not producing one, after just a day? If even one parent has been sat refreshing her feed since 3pm to see what her recipe for a budget dinner tonight might be - then that is shameful.

How dare she pretend to care.

 

[Feck]

Sorry I'm late. I was deleting my Tommy Lee search history.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

I watched some of the BBC bit... Her top lip is channeling Rio Ferdinand somewhat

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Tommy Lee got his todger out on the ‘gram, this was deployed, grenade style, to distract from conversations about Jack’s baps. The afternoon shift of the canal, being driven half to distraction by the heat and in a short break between chaoses took the wang and ran with it. The wang is now in danger of becoming a side character in the vein of the pumble and the wallri.

That would be some party if the wang, pumble and Walri were there. Even better, no Jack to poop on the party.

 

[moldwarp]

“Lower people’s energy bills, let the energy companies take the hit for a while, and then the govt intervene with sort of payments to the energy companies to tide it over and then when the energy prices come back up or they stabilise again then it turns out to be a self funding model”.
You what? What does that even mean?

jAcK fOr cHaNcELLor

Jack please would you point to a period in history where energy prices have been stable for 5 years or more. Any time over the past 100 years would be fine.

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Sorry I'm late. I was deleting my Tommy Lee search history.

Please be on your work computer.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

How silly of me to try and grunk during dinner

Just look at the wang for a protein hit.

 

[Emmapism]

Walked past Tracy Emin earlier. Closest I'll ever get to expensive art because I'm not as poor as Jack

 

[Pimpinella]

Posting from the past and desperately grunking so apologies if this has been said

Leslie Ash called, she wants her trout pout back.

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Leslie Ash ruined her face but at least her eyes aren't dead...... JM has the eyes of a person with a crowbar behind their back waiting for their chance....

 

[Thank(space)you]

Can we have another poll please? To see who people think will win in Pumble v Wang?

Who/what is a Wang? Is it a penis? If so, I have more questions

 

[ScouseGobsheet]

I know we had our vote and it's a laugh about Jack just not doing her recipe.

But how disgraceful is her disregard for others in not producing one, after just a day? If even one parent has been sat refreshing her feed since 3pm to see what her recipe for a budget dinner tonight might be - then that is shameful.

How dare she pretend to care.

And yet the Twitter idiot squad will still be lining up in droves to rinse her hoop, especially as she’s been ON BBC NEWS today so is a proper famous expert. Hey, she had to get up at almost before 8 a.m. and do a whole 2min interview from her own kitchen, what more do you hateful ghouls WANT from the most famous cook / superhero in Britain, huh??? She’s only a Very Special human! God bless you, St Griftica, just throw a few of those zinger putdown tweets at the haters, we can nourish ourselves on that ambrosia alone!

 

[Phillipa78]

Another day, another terrible media appearance, another few squigs and hoops rinsed for dollar. I'm beginning to see the significance of the moon app now, this cyclical loop feels in keeping with the rhythm of the seasons.
Waxing gibbous is what Jack books in for at Vie?!
Tomorrow there'll be a chaos!!

Spoiler: Future event prediction using lunar woo-woo

 

[Mr Krabs]

Tommy Lee, you say?

I assume you’ve all watched Pam and Tommy on Disney+. It’s absolutely batshit so I highly recommend. I won’t spoil the wang scene if you’ve not seen it.

 

[LadyGarden]

New recipe is up.

Bitterness, Bile and Vitriol Stew (serves 10)

Ingredients
450g of botox
750ml of bullshit
4 peas
3 carrot chunks
Prunes

Method
Boil for 20 hours

Sprinkle with a large dose of self importance and a pinch of delusion - voilà!