Jack Monroe #343 A heavy dose of chickpea and loathing

[Amanda Lin]

I also feel like I need to share this, from the "Breakfast" section:

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God, how patronising is the tip?

Make sure you look for a PAT test sticker humble peasants, they might go bang and you will go sizzle and ouchie.

Go to a charity shop, maybe you can find a pity blender, don’t buy from the middle of Lidl because you don’t have a big car and the customers might tell you to shut your legs.

 

[FrumpyCat]

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give up squig. The woman an is a know-nothing idiot.

 

[Holasenoritax]

I used to make a baked bean 'curry' out of an onion, one tin of tomatoes and one tin of beans, with all the juices and sauce, plus curry powder/spices. I found the recipe on a parenting site (not mumsnet) and it works pretty well with rice or pittas when you're skint. Obviously not high in protein, but still quite filling and nice. There's tons of cheap recipes and ideas around like this, there's nothing special about any of Jack's recipes or anything that warrants a publishing contract.

That actually sounds tasty. unlike peach and chickpea curry

 

[Mr Krabs]

Excuse me, LORRAINE WAS IN THE PIPELINE FOR SEVEN YEARS.

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What she means is they sent the email to invite her on seven years ago and she only just read it in March.

 

[Holasenoritax]

I made a nice grid collage of a time when the lights were on.

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Miss narc looks absolutely chuffed with herself. Me me me

When the ritalin and tramadol kick in simultaneously

 

[colouredlines]

Catching up, but this would explain why the dog's tag is always showing the phone number and not the side with its name

The tag has the dog's name and the phone number on the same side.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

I was a student when Tescos were doing tins of beans for 5p and tomatoes for 3p. My entire diet was based around them.
I used to put different herbs and spices in the beans and it was a tasty and very cheap meal.

 

[colouredlines]

I used to make a baked bean 'curry' out of an onion, one tin of tomatoes and one tin of beans, with all the juices and sauce, plus curry powder/spices. I found the recipe on a parenting site (not mumsnet) and it works pretty well with rice or pittas when you're skint. Obviously not high in protein, but still quite filling and nice. There's tons of cheap recipes and ideas around like this, there's nothing special about any of Jack's recipes or anything that warrants a publishing contract.

When I had student cookbooks years ago there were always recipes for Chilli Baked Beans or Baked Bean Melt or Jazzy Baked Beans or whatever. Normal, and very simple when you're learning to cook.

TBH if Jack had called it Jack's Special Baked Beans or something, fine. Weird method but eh.

But the fact that the recipe is called Homemade Baked Beans and the first ingredient is a tin of baked beans is just...it's performance art at this point, surely?

 

[Holasenoritax]

I feel like Jack's gagging for people to call her work number that she's purposely posted for thousands to see on twitter under the guise of it being an innocent mistake and just happens to be on her dogs collar. she could of facetuned that had she wanted, she does everything else, the sky and her legs included. That would make great content for her, someone calling her work number asking for feet pictures, she'd be secretly loving it. Anything for attention

 

[fairylights2000]

The tag has the dog's name and the phone number on the same side.

With this level of forensic attention to detail, I might well be Jack!!

 

[Bell'un]

When I had student cookbooks years ago there were always recipes for Chilli Baked Beans or Baked Bean Melt or Jazzy Baked Beans or whatever. Normal, and very simple when you're learning to cook.

TBH if Jack had called it Jack's Special Baked Beans or something, fine. Weird method but eh.

But the fact that the recipe is called Homemade Baked Beans and the first ingredient is a tin of baked beans is just...it's performance art at this point, surely?

Baked bean lasagne I remember from student days! That was at a dinner party x

 

[Ostapbender]

I also feel like I need to share this, from the "Breakfast" section:

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Wow, I can eat it with Mark's Get Up And Go Toast

 

[Bell'un]

I feel like Jack's gagging for people to call her work number that she's purposely posted for thousands to see on twitter under the guise of it being an innocent mistake and just happens to be on her dogs collar. she could of facetuned that had she wanted, she does everything else, the sky and her legs included. That would make great content for her, someone calling her work number asking for feet pictures, she'd be secretly loving it. Anything for attention

I think it started by accident but she can't bear to be corrected or helped...she always needs to be the rescuer...but calling for help constantly...exhausting to watch on Twitter. Potentially a nightmare for any nearby friends and relatives xx

 

[Holasenoritax]

"Raised Greek".

oh ffs raised greek

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Isn't she exhausted yet? How long can one woman argue complete bollocks!

 

[Holasenoritax]

I think it started by accident but she can't bear to be corrected or helped...she always needs to be the rescuer...but calling for help constantly...exhausting to watch on Twitter. Potentially a nightmare for any nearby friends and relatives xx

She's a typical narc, her friends are most likely exhausted by her BS

 

[It’s The Truman Show]

Here you go, dear heart - I'm sure you'll agree it was worth the wait x

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So basically rinse your baked beans and add all the ingredients to make ….. baked beans. WTF

 

[Onestorytoomany]

L

So basically rinse your baked beans and add all the ingredients to make ….. baked beans. WTF

I keep thinking about her ' poo" pudding she made a Christmas. Everyone else has forgotten about it

 

[Mr Krabs]

Let’s not forget her classic recipe for Triple Tomato Soup.

I have so many questions, such as why are you making soup out of soup? But my main one is, why do you need to blend this? It’s soup and chopped tomatoes. Even with the ouwchiest of mouths you could drink this down.

 

[Falkor]

If BIB is not the next thread title, there is LITERALLY ~NO JUSTICE~ IN THE WORLD.

I completely agree with you, but unfortunately the next thread is #344, so I think the title has been predestined for some time!