Jack Monroe #343 A heavy dose of chickpea and loathing

[Falkor]

We have a spite castle not too far from here. It got built in 1907 as part of a divorce settlement for a second wife, she chose a plot of land as close to her ex's land as possible, where they would see the building when they passed on the train, and the clock tower only has three clock faces on it, the side facing her ex's castle is blank because she wouldn't give him the time of day.

What next for the Highland 'haunted Castle of Spite'?

Historic Carbisdale Castle in Sutherland is back on the market for the third time in six years.

www.bbc.co.uk

(It has now sold, sadly - I'd have loved to take a crack at doing that up.)

 

[Captainmouse]

Not to get back to teeth counting (although we have a lot more members who might want to do it privately) she did claim to have too many teeth at one point. We got excited - hence the counting teeth - only to find she actually has an entirely normal amount.

How can she have too many, when they appear to be running for the hills?

 

[AnnRKey]

I made a nice grid collage of a time when the lights were on.

View attachment 1432542

This was the first thing I saw this morning. Day. Ruined.
Weeping!

I bet she doesn't brush her teef

going by the state of her gums, she doesn't

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Breaking a tooth is so traumatic though, how can she just be nonchalantly posting about 'intriguing sharpness' etc like can you please just go to a dentist or say you're making it up

I just hope someone has taken care of SB's dental health over the years

 

[YenE]

She also has 3 Microplane cheese graters, she offered to send one to a squig once. Want to say there's another utensil she has 3 of, veg peelers or something, escapes me now.

Three’s the magic number, so the song tells me…

 

[NomDeGuerre]

If she loses any more toothy pegs she’ll be all (mucky) fingers and gums.

 

[Hollaaa]

Highlighted bit, what does that mean? at first I was thinking it's when daddy gets you a job, else a way to get rid of daddies useless daughter from the job

View attachment 1433246

In the NHS when efficiency savings first came in we used to recruit S L O W L Y when someone left because it would claw back some of the staffing costs for that year's budget while the post was vacant. Of course that would put additional pressure on the team in terms of capacity and workload. I presume it's that kind of thing, but the usual WFK caveat applies.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

It’s the 21st so evidently running short on Patreon cash…..

Isn’t her second revenue stream dating tho? She’s gonna have to up the sexy little food minx shenanigans and do less of the festering Dickensian corpse tit to secure another mortgage broker appt

 

[SlopAmbsase]

It doesn't add up at all. Can't answer the door, can't open her post as The Poverty has left her with PTSD, gets some money and just fritters it away .

Not only that, she takes her (first or second? Help, timeline Fraus) advance and spite purchases TWO fugly coats from Burberry. It makes so little sense.

 

[FrumpyCat]

Given Jack's general griftiness and astonishing rate of tooth loss, I'm now imagining her as some kind of reverse tooth fairy, where she sneaks into your house and takes a wad of cash/swipes your credit card details before leaving one of her rotten teeth under your pillow in exchange.

Interesting aside.

A bit of minor googling shows the relationship between tooth decay, ouchy mouth and cocaine use ( don't look at the pictures while you are eating).

 

[Elastoblast]

As more and more lies become apparent about the alcoholism story, the homeless/living rough period, the coming out timeline, the continuing dental decline and well everything really perhaps Jack could use one of her many notebooks or lever arch files or even a spreadsheet to help her keep track. She could call it the veritable bullshit index or summat

 

[Clarends]

Highlighted bit, what does that mean? at first I was thinking it's when daddy gets you a job, else a way to get rid of daddies useless daughter from the job

View attachment 1433246

If she cares about fires, why not use her considerable platform to do something about climate change and the scary heat that led to those fires, rather than talking about herself.

Oh it's Jack, who can only talk about herself.

 

[Orphan_Black]

If she cares about fires, why not use her considerable platform to do something about climate change and the scary heat that led to those fires, rather than talking about herself.

Oh it's Jack, who can only talk about herself.

I'm glad to have her keep quiet and not repeat her Grenfell antics.

During the heatwave she was advocating laying in the sun all day in skimpy bikinis. No mention of SPF, nada. She is a menace when giving out advice.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Just saw this on Insta. Battered Mulberry bag, anyone?

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

I also had to have lots of teeth removed because I’m an ickle small pixie. I even had a few more removed when I was an adult.
I also had a teeth crumble on me (biting a sandwich) but it was a 30 year old filling and the tooth had weakened.

Like I said this is her job now, be prepared for more ouchy teeth, more arthritis flare ups that last one day, crushing never ending periods of depression that are miraculously forgotten about. This is the world now.

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

It's becoming so obvious that she's not committed to a career in food. It was only ever a vehicle. Her skills and knowledge have deteriorated. She's astoundingly poorly read, she's uninterested in the work of her peers, and she's unable to develop. It's pitiful.

 

[Orphan_Black]

It's becoming so obvious that she's not committed to a career in food. It was only ever a vehicle. Her skills and knowledge have deteriorated. She's astoundingly poorly read, she's uninterested in the work of her peers, and she's unable to develop. It's pitiful.

She's not committed to working. That simple. She wants a free ride in life, and oh my, the squigs are providing.

 

[Django]

We have a spite castle not too far from here. It got built in 1907 as part of a divorce settlement for a second wife, she chose a plot of land as close to her ex's land as possible, where they would see the building when they passed on the train, and the clock tower only has three clock faces on it, the side facing her ex's castle is blank because she wouldn't give him the time of day.

What next for the Highland 'haunted Castle of Spite'?

Historic Carbisdale Castle in Sutherland is back on the market for the third time in six years.

www.bbc.co.uk

(It has now sold, sadly - I'd have loved to take a crack at doing that up.)

Jack would need a plethora of towers, a veritable multitude, to spite everyone who has deserved her scathing wrath.

 

[Vinbisha]

Sorry, what?
She's been wandering around for how long with a DEAD TOOTH crumbling away in her head?!
Now I'm not a dentistry frau, but would that not absolutely stink and make everything taste utterly disgusting?
I genuinely feel quite gippy at this revelation.

 

[Boogs]

She's not committed to working. That simple. She wants a free ride in life, and oh my, the squigs are providing.

I think it all comes down to this and all of her many differing stories are about achieving this outcome. She blatantly contradicts herself so many times that I wonder if it’s almost a power game. Like she gets off on telling massive lies and having people believe her. She’s like the boy who cried wolf and has lied so much that I don’t believe anything she says. What’s the story on today’s Jackanory?