Jack Monroe #326 You absolutely reek of bitterness, fantasy and too much time on your hands
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Wouldn't it take this to a new level of hilarity if Harold dumped her because she was just too busy with the VBI and has no time for him, having failed to notice that all she does is sit on Twitter begging for asspats.
God she's so sad. I'll fully admit to not being the most outgoing person, socially (have genuine health problems and work full time which cramps my style). But if I ever become so reliant on the internet for validation that I'm begging for headpats for clearing my inbox, just fecking shoot me.
A master of disingenuity
Best way to get over one man is to get under another one, Jack.
But never mind, you go ahead and hyperfocus on groupon emails.
But never mind, you go ahead and hyperfocus on groupon emails.
Jeeez..... she really thinks she's some kind of special superhuman. Just embarrassing.
I will forever be impressed that she managed to get her hair crispier than her roast potatoes have ever been.Sorry if this has already been done (I'm still officially on the last thread) but I've been trying to piece together the timeline of the Harold relationship.
25 November 2021 - she's not looking for another partner and it'll be "a cold day in hell" before she even considers it.
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28 December 2021 - she's in the midst of her toe-curling pleather/crispy hair/eyeshadow phase and is clearly trying to impress someone.
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20 February 2022 - "the boy did good" cheese on toast. IIRC there was also a breadcrumbing "What would you cook if you were having a special someone round for dinner?" around this time.
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March 2022 - first official mention of "OH." (Many, many more follow.) Shortly afterwards she starts referring to "in-laws" etc. See Marm's excellent compilation yesterday.
2 June 2022 - makes comment about her "next child"and drops a loaf about "needing the spare room for something else."
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Going from "not looking for a relationship" to hinting about a potential new baby in six months? No wonder he did a runner.
Eyelid Art Jack was something else.
After lurking for months, I've registered just to post this. It'd take 16.4 days at 10 seconds per email if she were to read all 141746 of them! As someone else has said, hyperfocus doesn't work like that.
It doesn't work though, does it Jack? Because god knows how many opportunities you MISSED in the however long it took that shitshow to build up.
Covid is making me grumpy - I just can't with her inane oversimplification of how the world works today.
I am still a little bit gutted that she didn't do the Quality Street inspired eye makeup a squig asked her to though.
Am going to have to step away from the phone for an hour unless I can hold my laugh in. Just about to go on a ferry.
So basically this fucknugget has ignored 100 potential work opportunities over the last 3 months because she's been too busy getting her hole (I hate that phrase hence using it for her). Now she's getting her diary out and grovelling
Urgh!,
So basically this fucknugget has ignored 100 potential work opportunities over the last 3 months because she's been too busy getting her hole (I hate that phrase hence using it for her). Now she's getting her diary out and grovelling
Urgh!,
Thank you and welcome, maths frau
Is her 10 year dream to have read her emails?
She's so boring.
I would have some kind of tube linking my mouth to a large bottle of vodka underneath a large mackintosh
She's paraphrased the tweets of other journos with her RMT tweet. bleeping thief.
I seek her here, I seek her there.There’s no way to say this without sounding like a piece of tit so sorrybut TikTok is maaahsive for fashion & beauty atm and content tends to be v aspirational/aesthetic. I can’t imagine they’ll want to feature her CGI recreation of a primitive man looking face on it, but stranger things have happened. She tends to just do cheap bottom barrel advertorials with low traffic publishers with her brand partners now rather than any creative content.
I was expecting to find cardboard cut outs of her next to the tills in Superdrug but I haven't made my way there yet.
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Please bring back later for you know what.
I've tried to make this my life motto but the universe isn't complying
Am screaming at some of your posts
I have been on a massive grunk. Many thanks, Fraus for keeping a watchful eye while I tried to keep the world outside social media together.
Ffs now I have dipped my toe back in all I can say is. The main difference between the world now and the world before Twitter is before you could just *think* someone was a prick, but you didn’t need to tell them! On the whole I think it was better without having to read our girls drivel. OH ( I think they did exist) clearly must have access her online persona. I’ll get my court clothes out the wardrobe.
Ffs now I have dipped my toe back in all I can say is. The main difference between the world now and the world before Twitter is before you could just *think* someone was a prick, but you didn’t need to tell them! On the whole I think it was better without having to read our girls drivel. OH ( I think they did exist) clearly must have access her online persona. I’ll get my court clothes out the wardrobe.
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