Jack Monroe #306 Jack and the Giant Lawsuit

[Cack Conroe]

What changed Jack. Now you want to lamp them and spank them and your flying monkeys cheer it on!

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"wondering how the duck I will make money this month to pay my bills".

"I am a vocal, blistering, coruscating campigner" + entire paragraph of her good deeds.

"it makes me a decent human being.

Even in a legitimate post opposing violence, she managed to get some poor-fishing in as well as a good bit of grandiosity. Absolute textbook virtuous victim narcissist behaviour.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Not to me-rail but the number of spendy brands I've had to Google because of these threads please tell me I'm not the only one who didn't know what a 'penhaligon' is.

...i hear ya!! I bought a lovely bag, round about thread 35, because there was a lot of Mia Tui chat! I had never heard of it before

 

[FlowerOfTheEast]

Friends of Jack's knew Tara P-T? So working-class. Much poor.

 

[GrannyOgg]

I don't rate JMs writing at all, it’s far too turgid for my taste and has me longing to Run a red pen through half of it.
It was actually the way her tweets were written that first started me wondering about her. Everything was too dramatic and contrived. Her tweets read like fiction and I don’t think she fools anyone once they really start to pay attention.
That's her biggest danger now, who is paying attention.

 

[Cack Conroe]

Spoiler: Facebook post- CW Abuse etc

I hadn’t heard this one before:

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Um, if you collapse, you can't call an ambulance? Also you'd be fairly low in the priority list and they might not turn up for 8 hours.

 

[FrumpyCat]

Sorry… a Seamaster watch?? Am I reading this correctly?!! Is it the case that Jack received one of these as a gift from her parents at some point or do I misunderstand?

I grew up fairly poor myself, but can’t deny my family are now probably best described as middle class. I have a professional qualification, and currently have a pretty good job, albeit an interim one, and would say my partner does too, both our wages being above average.

I nonetheless consider those kind of watches to be a luxury extravagance that’s probably still slightly beyond us unless we were being really very generous to ourselves or each other. You get those or give those, when you have a lot of money and can afford to splash out.

Jack’s parents gave her one of these??

the only evidence I have seen of the existence of the Seamaster watch if Jack saying she had to sell it.

if it existed and was a present or bought by Jack for herself, or was actually a Michael Korrs watch who knows.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Ah yes, I often dream of steak and pearls and peaches. Preferably from Tbilisi.

Why you giggle?
Emboldened squiggle

 

[Orphan_Black]

the only evidence I have seen of the existence of the Seamaster watch if Jack saying she had to sell it.

if it existed and was a present or bought by Jack for herself, or was actually a Michael Korrs watch who knows.

Forget the Seamaster, she's got her dad's fugly old watch now. It's fancy.

 

[Tabitha D]

This is where she mentions the Omega Seamaster:

“The Omega Seamaster watch, a 21st birthday present, was the first to go when I left the Fire Service.”

Hunger Hurts. (July 2012)

Today has seen fourteen job applications go in, painstakingly typed on this Jurassic mobile phone, for care work, shop work, factory work, minimum wage work, any kind of work, because quite simply,…

cookingonabootstrap.com

 

[EddieBeds]

I’ve found Jack’s next cosplay….please can a photoshop Queen work their magic on this.

Spoiler: Gozer / Ghostbusters

 

[Captainmouse]

What.

Honestly, is there anything she won't claim?

Being honest !

 

[Lazarus]

I imagine our Jackie heard this one and related so bleeping hard she had to immediately whip a pen from her top pocket and write all the lyrics in one of her best moleskin journals:

"Working Class Hero"
(originally by John Lennon)

As soon as your born they make you feel small
By giving you no time instead of it all
Till the pain is so big you feel nothing at all
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

They hurt you at home and they hit you at school
They hate you if you're clever and they despise a fool
Till you're so bleeping crazy you can't follow their rules
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

When they've tortured and scared you for twenty odd years
Then they expect you to pick a career
When you can't really function you're so full of fear
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

Keep you doped with religion and sex and TV
And you think you're so clever and classless and free
But you're still bleeping peasants as far as I can see
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

There's room at the top they are telling you still
But first you must learn how to smile as you kill
If you want to be like the folks on the hill
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

If you want to be a hero well just follow me
If you want to be a hero well just follow me

I’m a massive Beatles fan, but any mention of Working Class Hero and/or Imagine make my insides curl up and die.
the irony of writing songs like this whilst being a millionaire living in a gigantic mansion with a rolls Royce on the gravel drive just kills me.
give me My Sweet Lord or even Mull of Kintyre any day!

 

[MancBee]

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Well that explains a lot. Since childhood she has dreamed of a life surrounded by, and being part of, the wealthy and elite. Nothing less will do for Jack.

She has spent all her adult life trying to be included in those "parties and princesses". She sees herself as worthy of a higher place in society.

Most young girls grow out of such fantasies. Jack thinks she deserves for those fantasies to come true.

What a sad little life.

 

[MooBelle]

Sorry… a Seamaster watch?? Am I reading this correctly?!! Is it the case that Jack received one of these as a gift from her parents at some point or do I misunderstand?

I grew up fairly poor myself, but can’t deny my family are now probably best described as middle class. I have a professional qualification, and currently have a pretty good job, albeit an interim one, and would say my partner does too, both our wages being above average.

I nonetheless consider those kind of watches to be a luxury extravagance that’s probably still slightly beyond us unless we were being really very generous to ourselves or each other. You get those or give those, when you have a lot of money and can afford to splash out.

Jack’s parents gave her one of these??

Yup. A £4k watch. Which she then sold.

 

[JuliaGulia]

To be honest if I hadn’t found Tattle I would be cheering her on today and would probably have topped up the tip jar. I never followed her closely enough to pick up all the inconsistencies- I just thought she was a genuinely good egg.

I had to warn a friend I saw asking for her paypal details on Facebook earlier today. It's such a hard thing to explain without going into enough detail to make yourself look crazed!

 

[colouredlines]

Highlight of the Mumsnet thread:

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

Spoiler: Spoiler as this one is extra cringe - sing lyrics!

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No idea what this is referring to!

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Spoiler: The song lyrics: I hate myself but every time, I can't resist going line by line

"I'm older for a year out on the dole" - what? Everyone's older after a year. Because a year has passed. What?
"There's no fairytale or wonderland here on the other side" - the other side of what?
"Got a letter to David penned" - I'm sure this is David Cameron but I'm losing my mind over the idea that she writes letters to Big Dave and his PA ignores them

"Can you smell the salt and the sugar of the obsolete fairground rides" - eh? I'll grant you, I've not been on a fairground ride in about 30 years but I don't remember them smelling particularly nice.
"Can you walk inside my shoes in dead straight lines" - what does this even mean?

"Don't fasten your safety bars" - did the Landrover have safety bars?
"You'll see this crooked house and you'll be horrified" - whose is the crooked house? Jack's? She doesn't have a house. She RENTS.

Brave faces, strange places, bread and jam etc. is too dreadfully boring for me to even mention.

"I've got an unelected leader who says we're in it together" - which unelected leader would that be?
"He's got four homes and a deputy" - so's yer da

"Can you smell the salt and sugar, all the about-turns and the lies" - since when have lies smelled like salt and sugar? The woman is unwell.
"Can you walk in my shoes along the tide" - this is a slight improvement on the last one, but it's not exactly Shakespeare, is it?

"Can you see the nurse behind them with a coat over her uniform" - breaking news, nurse wears coat.

It's laughable that she says the papers have been bought and sold, when those very papers are who she writes for. Big Jack Logic.

"Students kick in windows, screaming riots" - I don't understand. There weren't any violent student protests in 2012, when she wrote this. The ones where the police kettled students were in 2010.

This is all terrible.

ETA the post I was actually replying to because I did an enormous chaos.

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Well that explains a lot. Since childhood she has dreamed of a life surrounded by, and being part of, the wealthy and elite. Nothing less will do for Jack.

She has spent all her adult life trying to be included in those "parties and princesses". She sees herself as worthy of a higher place in society.

Most young girls grow out of such fantasies. Jack thinks she deserves for those fantasies to come true.

What a sad little life.

Does anyone know were Tara PT and Diana even friendly?

 

[GrannyOgg]

Highlight of the Mumsnet thread:

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I was just going to post that. It’s the funniest thing I’ve read in ages. I love smart, snarky women

 

[DinosaurSenior]

I know I'm a bit of a thicko.... but....how do you type job applications on a phone in 2012?