Hard agree. Like lots of us I have a history (and present tbh) of spotty mental health, self harm, therapy and some fun diagnoses. It's only my relative anonymity here that means I'm prepared to discuss it, as I don't ever want my daughter to know how bad things got at points because she was part of my life then. Probably the reason I'm still here is that there was just enough left of me when things were bad that thought I knew how bad it would be for my daughter if I wasn't.
I no longer think, I now know, how bad it would have been, because her dad died last year (not suicide, but tbh not far off, just a slow version involving alcohol). We weren't together any more and he was a very non-resident parent, she rarely saw him, but it was utterly devastating for her. I don't have the words for the pain she's been through as a kid losing a parent or really the emotional strength to explain how heartbreaking it has been for all of us who love her (and his other kids, though they are technically grown up now). It's been a lot, though, and Jack, if you grunk and look under this spoiler, then please stop using topics like this to deflect, and please stop writing things about suicide and parental death where your son can read them (and you've said he does read your Twitter). I've been through a lot of hard things, a lot of them on my own, and this one, even with plenty of support, has been the hardest. My ex left a trail of destruction through his childrens' lives with his way of life (always focused on him and his needs and his problems and his worse than everyone else's life) and his horrible death. Think on, please. Grow up. It's not all about you anymore.
Sorry everyone. That was a lot. I'm a bit triggered (which is on me for reading things I shouldn't, I know) I'm probably going to sit in the garden for a bit now.
obviously knows this is the JM thread because it changed that to disgusting
and it's a rule of thumb for me to try not to label them (for ex, "you enjoy maths more than science" would work better than "you're better at maths"; "you're doing good work" would be better than "you're bright" etc); some kids aren't bothered, but for others, labels can lead to a fixed mindset about their work and potential. Growth mindset for adults leads to chasing up opportunities, not getting stuck on past times you got labelled as bright or not... (coughjmcough)
too.
