Jesus. This is why I quite often have no respect for my fellow humans.Sandwich guff now trending. FFS.
Why am I horrified at the goings on in the world and in our own government when this , THIS ! From HER is a trending subject?!
Jack Monroe #268 May I ask where you work?
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Why am I horrified at the goings on in the world and in our own government when this , THIS ! From HER is a trending subject?!
Isn't that the 'You'll Eat It If You're Hungry Enough' school of parenting? The one where you get your dinner back for breakfast if it's not polished off with an 'Oh, dearest Mama, that was truly the most scrummilicious morsel of joy in the whole of Christendom!' as soon as you sit to the table, elbows off, back straight and never leave without a 'Thank you for my lovely meal, Mama, please may I be excused to do my Ancient Greek prep forthwith'?
Having said that, my second was the twattiest mini gourmet in year 1. She wanted to have bento boxes stuffed with smoked salmon/rice/diced cherry tomatoes/cucumber, prawn cocktail and baguette slices, peking duck ingredients to make up with cucumber shreds and hoisin sauce, sashimi and sushi, or homemade pizza plus fresh strawberries, grapes and satsumas - and I thank the heavens that she never encountered Charaben until after she was old enough to do it herself. Her father did not approve. he believed that all children want or should have was a Dairylea Lunchable, Capri Sun and a Kit-Kat or three cold cocktail sausages, a Mini Babybel and a carton of Ribena.
It's not that hard to relocate a dislocated joint if you're quick and can identify exactly what way it went out. Especially when your experiences of the NHS are largely of the 'well, what do you want us to do about it? It's not broken'. But it's absolutely a zero force/gravity only option only for those who have a diagnosed medical condition and even with that condition, there are times when you still end up having to go because either you can't get it back in or the damage done in the initial pop is so bad that even after it's snugly back in place, the swelling and pain starts. The last time I did my left shoulder, the residual damage took over 18 months to heal, though - but that's after nearly half a century of partial tears to the tendons and ligaments where residual scar tissue isn't as flexible as what was originally there.
However, it's yet another fall down the stairs. Which means time for more 'head injury' shite to go with the ever so subtle epilepsy breadcrumbing she's been doing.
i wonder what she was supposed to be doing in that there London that she now won't be able to do? Meeting with the publisher, perhaps?
She may mean a subluxation (if it happened at all) If you're not used to them it can feel like a dislocation and would drive you to visit a&e.
But if you're an afficionada/o you would have learned to put things back into place yourself.
Still very effing painful especially if you don't have them regularly but I think she might be using the wrong word, tbf I used to until I learned subluxation...it's easier to use familiar language to explain certain conditions to half a million laypeople at once
why use your personal experience to benefit others when you could just claim all the drama and glory for yourself?
What kind of salad, yellow sticker or otherwise, can you āsmash to smithereensā?????
ETA: Oh yeah, the imaginary type. Dāoh!
Oh god, Mind-Numbingly Dull Jack is fronting today.
When she gets like this, she's worse than a Mumsnet thread about how often you wash your towels.
And we can't even shout NO ONE bleeping CARES because of course, there are hundreds of desperate idiots dying to share that oooh, you'll never guess what goes well on a sandwich...cheese! I've been having cheese on my sandwiches for 20 years now, it's great stuff.
When she gets like this, she's worse than a Mumsnet thread about how often you wash your towels.
And we can't even shout NO ONE bleeping CARES because of course, there are hundreds of desperate idiots dying to share that oooh, you'll never guess what goes well on a sandwich...cheese! I've been having cheese on my sandwiches for 20 years now, it's great stuff.
She considers this a successful day you know.Sandwich guff now trending. FFS.
SB went wild for it? Now I reread it properly, my arse did he.What kind of salad, yellow sticker or otherwise, can you āsmash to smithereensā?????
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ETA: Oh yeah, the imaginary type. Dāoh!
Probably the local dog he threw it to went wild for it
Poor SB, now wonder he stays so S if she keeps feeding him such vile concoctions, he probably never eats when he's with her.
Quarter salad bag AND kale, I'd expect my kids to spit that straight back onto the plate and I'd feel they were justified.
I'm often tired and I do often give them pretty crappy food but at least I'm honest about it and have apologised more than once for my lacklustre efforts
Ten years that platform has been her job.
At least itās cheese thatās trending. Cheese is the best food. I still ladydicry sometimes over What Jack Did To That Poor Cheese at Xmas. My favourite sandwich is cheese & Branston pickle. Original and best.
My knees are fine having not drunk whatever wine it is that makes my knees ache but I do finally have the rona, having just recovered from a two week hell-spawned cold, feeling v hard done by.
I wonder what height the highest fence SB has ever launched his packed lunch over was.
About the height of a tennis club fence, perhaps?
Can we just clarify once and for all, Jack did not dislocate her kneecap, she didnāt sprain her knee, she didnāt even fall down the stairs.
She is a liar and a fantasist, being enabled by idiot twats on Twitter. Jack Monroe is a compulsive liar, it will never change and people need to learn never to believe a word that comes out of her. Between lying and elevenerifing, thatās her 100 hours per week.
I wish I could explain how much I despise/dislike her. She is everything that is wrong in the world.
@Alansbigplate good to see you over on the snapshoteye threads mate, theyāre a male Jack!
She is a liar and a fantasist, being enabled by idiot twats on Twitter. Jack Monroe is a compulsive liar, it will never change and people need to learn never to believe a word that comes out of her. Between lying and elevenerifing, thatās her 100 hours per week.
I wish I could explain how much I despise/dislike her. She is everything that is wrong in the world.
@Alansbigplate good to see you over on the snapshoteye threads mate, theyāre a male Jack!
I suspect her kneecap may have slid to the side slightly and then slid back again - I've done this and it's bloody painful, but it's not a dislocation.
This bloody annoys me because you couldnāt make that for just 24pā¦. Thatās not the way to cost a recipe
So much this. I don't believe one word of it.
Isnāt it funny that weāve had trifle and sandwich nonsense over the past few days - her favourite tried and tested ways to cover up uncomfortable questions and up engagement. All we needed was a āwhat were your favourite sweets when you were a kidā for the hat-trick (no not that kind of hat)
She is a liar. Or exaggerator to the point of lying. The convulsing on the bed with twitching limbs due to a migraine, but not bothering to go to the Dr, is a low.
I imagine she slightly bumped her stupid kneecap, which span into a bizarre fantasy about dislocation which she believes she can use at some point in the future. She has a roladex of ailments she can trot out at suitable moments. Usually to get her out of something or beg for money.
Has anyone seen the new docu-series on Netflix called Bad Vegan? A vegan restaurant owner embezzled money and *shock* allegedly ate cheese.
Maybe Jack's next house move should be to a bungalow where no falling down of steps can occur?
Thread title nom!! Far enough into the thread for a suggestion now
I fell down our very steep stairs a few years back carrying washing and only got a bruise, feeling left out! 
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