I really hope you don’t leave.That would be so sad. It was just one post and certainly not meant in any bad way.
Jack Monroe #21 If you cut me do I not bleed mayonnaise? #jacklivesmatter
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Echoing the others, don’t go! It is considered offensive to say you don’t see colour, as it minimises the genuine experiences POC have gone through and/are going through - they can’t escape being seen for their colour and categorised by their colour by a huge portion of society. That, and, people from BAME backgrounds don’t really want to be thought of as the same colour as everyone else, they’re proud of their race and ethnicity and culture, they just don’t want to be treated like tit because of it. So it’s problematic, but I can certainly see that you were not trying to be hurtful at all. There’s always room to grow and learn, sounds cheesy but it’s true.
I think @Bellybutton lint , your response above encapsulates the reason a lot of us are here. You said something not great, it was pointed out to you, and you deleted, apologised and owned your mistake.
If you need to take time off tonight from this thread tonight and reflect, that's fine.
But remember we're all here because we know our thread namesake will NEVER do the above. Because that person is incapable of owning their duck ups.
Maybe let this be a lesson about how someone can do or say something wrong, but when they apologise and own it properly, they won't be hounded or hated... But encouraged to learn and be better.
This type of thing can be really hard to word correctly, but I think you done good!
It's about education -I've never thought that shouting 'racist' 'misogynist ' or whatever when someone means well but gets it wrong was particularly helpful.
Echoing the others for you not to go Bellybutton Lint.
I was trying to write a more articulate response but AdultHumanFemale summed up what I was trying to type myself -
I was trying to write a more articulate response but AdultHumanFemale summed up what I was trying to type myself -
I think @Bellybutton lint , your response above encapsulates the reason a lot of us are here. You said something not great, it was pointed out to you, and you deleted, apologised and owned your mistake.
If you need to take time off tonight from this thread tonight and reflect, that's fine.
But remember we're all here because we know our thread namesake will NEVER do the above. Because that person is incapable of owning their duck ups.
Maybe let this be a lesson about how someone can do or say something wrong, but when they apologise and own it properly, they won't be hounded or hated... But encouraged to learn and be better.
Please don't go Bellybutton, you are one of my favourite people on here.
I feel awful that you are feeling awful.
I think it's a bit scary that we need to worry about being jumped on for using what others have decided are the *wrong* words or expressions.
That isn't a criticism of any Tattle poster, just an observation.
I'm not sure if I'll stay on this thread either if comments are going to be policed to that extent.
I really agree with this, I’ve had to do some thinking over the last few days too. White people need to call out the systems that are in place, we need to ask where the BAME people are in adverts, in influencer campaigns, on the talk panels, where are the voices?Learning about this stuff can be, and often is, deeply uncomfortable. To be honest, that's part of the reason that influencers have been so roundly panned for their posts about race over the past few days - they've put their foot in it then taken it badly when they've been corrected. And it's why so many of the Black voices over the past few days have been urging us to read and learn.
*I know I haven’t done that, to do that I need to see colour and see what is happening. I have been very vocal about the child floggers and noticed they were mainly MC white women but I don’t make my voice known.
What has pissed me off about the last couple of days is the number of mumfluencers who are reading their children stories and talking to them about racism. They aren’t mentioning what they will do to change their own behaviour, how they will challenge the system, and as we have seen today with Hellmans, when questioned the white person should stand up and disagree with the institutional racism otherwise the quotes and books mean nothing.
So back to Jack, we all wait to see what she says....
I don’t think anyone is “policing”, what I saw was the essential conversation and support that we need to show each other in these times. We need to challenge and change, and we can. And we should. No malice was meant, on any side. That’s clear.
I have to add that before this week I probably would have said all lives matter too. I hadn’t realised what it really meant and how it minimised what people are going through. And tbh, I also have said Colour doesn’t matter, because I guess that’s the way I’ve justified that to me people are the way they speak to me, act etc but again hadn’t realised I minimised colour in their eyes. This week has been an education, thanks all who’ve contributed. And belly button, please don’t leave, we’re all on a learning journey.
Agree, we cannot claim to hold someone to a standard and then not apply it to ourselves.
More importantly, nor should we want to, because duck hypocrisy.
Don't go, @Bellybutton lint. I saw this amazing 10-minute black and white Youtube video by a cookbook writer the other day that is the perfect way to learn about these issues, you should watch it!
Please don't go @Bellybutton lint 
Uhhh today we cooked is a conceited dick. Honestly she's awful. I have followed her since "nedintheclouds"
Omg really? I’ve followed her a bit and done few recipes? Is she awful?
I didn't say that you were unduly moderating threads, you're not a moderator so can't do so.
I was just expressing an opinion, one I am perfectly entitled to hold.
I wonder what your definition of "misdoings" is - I didn't see anything that @Bellybutton lint lint said as one.
Sorry if I've offended you, I've enjoyed this thread but really not keen on having to watch my words.
Just to echo the words of others. There is no need to learn. This is a gorgeous caring community. We help each other with food, MH and now we’re challenging internal bias. We’re all learning.
I spoke to someone who didn’t like the term POC. It had never occurred to me that is might be disrespectful. To them it make them feel other. You’re either white or not. It made me think j about what I’ve learned. I’m not racist but I’ve learned I’m not actively not racist. And there is a big difference. I’ve made comments about black men in clubs, held my bag closed when a group have walked past. I’ve enjoyed black culture and as has been said, I wanted the rhythm not the blues. I‘ve had to look at my feminism and what I teach my daughter.
What I’ve come away with is I’ve got so much to learn. i can’t do it all, and I need people to educate me. If I say something insensitive, put me on the right path.
What you said wasn’t from a place of malice, but if we don’t walk out systemic micro aggressions we never grow.
I really hope you stay, you’ve been a great contributor. And this thread is a place I feel is a safe space to have these discussions.
When black lives matter, all lives matter.
Our BAME brothers and sisters need us to stand in solidarity dismantling a system that has been holding them down. And that begins with ourselves.
Muchlove cx
I spoke to someone who didn’t like the term POC. It had never occurred to me that is might be disrespectful. To them it make them feel other. You’re either white or not. It made me think j about what I’ve learned. I’m not racist but I’ve learned I’m not actively not racist. And there is a big difference. I’ve made comments about black men in clubs, held my bag closed when a group have walked past. I’ve enjoyed black culture and as has been said, I wanted the rhythm not the blues. I‘ve had to look at my feminism and what I teach my daughter.
What I’ve come away with is I’ve got so much to learn. i can’t do it all, and I need people to educate me. If I say something insensitive, put me on the right path.
What you said wasn’t from a place of malice, but if we don’t walk out systemic micro aggressions we never grow.
I really hope you stay, you’ve been a great contributor. And this thread is a place I feel is a safe space to have these discussions.
When black lives matter, all lives matter.
Our BAME brothers and sisters need us to stand in solidarity dismantling a system that has been holding them down. And that begins with ourselves.
Muchlove cx
Next title?
? I’ve not said you’re not entitled to express your opinion, I was asking for further substantiation of it.
In this situation I quoted the post I found offensive - I don’t think it’s appropriate to reference owning two black cabs in the context of black / all lives matter, sorry I think it’s offensive and reductive.
Edit: and no worries you’ve not offended me bless you, I am amazed that being called out for ALM during this week is tantamount to “watching your words”. Would you not call Jack out for this?
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