Jack Monroe #21 If you cut me do I not bleed mayonnaise? #jacklivesmatter

[Flumps]

Yes, absolutely

<cries>

<adds name to list>

 

[Nonnymouse]

If I suddenly get told i'm not needed then we'll know 100% she reads here bcos I was the one who told the mayo people about BT and no-one else had so i'll have outed myself and won't get my fleeting moment of fame. Oh well...

 

[OhhBacon]

If I suddenly get told i'm not needed then we'll know 100% she reads here bcos I was the one who told the mayo people about BT and no-one else had so i'll have outed myself and won't get my fleeting moment of fame. Oh well...

Or will she double bluff and not out you!!!

 

[Ellabella]

I need to know what potato gems are.

 

[OhhBacon]

Am genuinely interested as to why she hasn’t shared this petition, if she is genuinely interested in food....I think I probably know the answer to this!

${page~title}

www.campaigns.nfuonline.com

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Depends if she has room in her rucksack to carry it with the 18 litres of paint and the copious amount of ink cartridges. If she doesn't it will take a long time.

What on earth is wrong with getting a shopping trolley like half of London does? Do they not have pavements in Southend?

Try looking at the people actually buying food rather than photographing it at Borough Market on a Friday - shopping trollies galore (and not an OAP in sight).

 

[Betty Neumar]

What on earth is wrong with getting a shopping trolley like half of London does? Do they not have pavements in Southend?

I don’t have a shopping trolley, can I charter a small plane instead?

 

[Nonnymouse]

What on earth is wrong with getting a shopping trolley like half of London does? Do they not have pavements in Southend?

Try looking at the people actually buying food rather than photographing it at Borough Market on a Friday - shopping trollies galore (and not an OAP in sight).

haha in 1992 I think, at Donington Monsters of Rock festival, I nicked a wire sgopping trolley from a supermarket to take back to the campsite to make a BBQ as we'd spent all our money on booze and burgers

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

I don’t have a shopping trolley, can I charter a small plane instead?

Yes, absolutely.

 

[Flumps]

I don’t have a shopping trolley, can I charter a small plane instead?

Yes, absolutely x

ETA: GODDAMMIT!!!!!!

 

[Peachy9]

If you can't afford real Cornetto, you can sub it with the ones from Iceland. Six for £1 - free recipe advice!

Also adding to this ; sainsbury do their own version of zzap ice lollies (called bubblegum lollies or something. ) look the same, cost £1 for 6, but most importantly.... Taste of childhood in the 90s

 

[Bingie]

Long-time lurker, second-time poster: is the crappy bungalow defo in Southend? If she’s getting Oddboxes (avocado salad recipe upthread) then she’d be living in London or the suburbs - or would they be sending them to her so she can write recipes for their blog?

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Shopping Trolley

Or, if you have the occasional pile of books or tins of paint to cart around


Folding Crate with Lid

Supplementing with a backpack (I suggest this one) should do the trick.

Obviously, they aren't Smeg pink, but I've considered the essential requirements of anything purchased gifted so, even though it's significantly more expensive because it's in a colour mired in sexual conformity, sexism and genderism they're in the same tone family.

And some cotton wool will help in padding the trainers if the cut on the foot is still a little uncomfortable.

 

[my_escape_from_the_ads]

Sorry you had a crappy day x

Ok, so I am trying to put myself in the mindset of when I don't want to eat... and it's hot (or is here at any rate), so I am initially thinking simple things that minimise clean up, or where the effort is done way before you have to eat, and a range of different flavours.

I had a bad couple of days at the end of last week.. I ate caprese salad and bread for two evenings. I sliced big tomatoes, and halved little cherry tomatoes earlier in the day, then left them marinading in best extra virgin olive oil, salt and pepper and the tiniest pinch of suger, in a bowl, covered, for a while. When I needed to eat - onto a plate, tore some mozzarella over them, and some basil leaves (no need for any knife action), jiggled it all together with another drizzle of oil and ate with fresh bread.

Slightly more fancy, but needs to marinade so can be done day before or hours before you want to eat. Block of feta cheese, pat dry and put in a bowl. Add a sliced chilli, 2 tbsps of olives (capers, FANCY, would also not go amiss here), a few sprigs of rosemary and a tsp of dried oregano, black pepper and a few good glugs of olive oil. Leave to marinade in the fridge for a few hours or overnight. When you want to eat, take feta out of marinade and put on a plate. Halve or quarter about 200g or more of cherry tomatoes, toss them in the marinade and pour over. Nice again with bread or squidged into flatbread or pitta.

Oh, my daughter's favourite wrap is dead easy too. Already poached salmon fillet (for ease, obviously you can do your own, but, effort, if you want to, then into foil parcel with a squeeze of lemon and into the oven for 20ish mins), avocado, baby spinach or other leaves. Sauce of equal parts mayo (ON BRAND) and yoghurt, snip some chives in if you can be bothered. Spread flatbread/tortilla with sauce, flake over salmon, add sliced avocado and leaves, roll up and eat.

Easy pasta, from Nigella in this instance, but does take two pans, so I sometimes find it too much.

150g spaghetti per person
3-4 tbsps extra virgin olive oil
1 or 2 cloves garlic, sliced thinly
big pinch chilli flakes (or more if you are me)
sea salt

Cook spaghetti. A few mins before it is done, gently heat oil and add garlic and chilli flakes until they smell, um, right. Add a couple of tbsps pasta water. Stir well and take off the heat. Tip in drained spaghetti and toss together. Sprinkle with salt and serve. Can add chopped parsley. I often don't.

Nigella makes no mention of parmesan or other cheese here, but I often add parmesan or grana padano, because I like cheese. A lot.

Another easy pasta (again Nigella, from How to Eat)

Cook some long thin pasta. Melt 2tbsps butter in a saucepan with a tsp olive oil. Add 2 garlic cloves, crushed with a knife and chopped rosemary. Remove garlic when it starts to brown and smell garlicky(!). Crumble in about 1/2 a chicken stock cube, add a bit more butter, a glug of white wine if you have some handy and a tbsp of pasta cooking water. Drain pasta, add, stir, grate parmesan, eat.

Bit more cooking:

Based on Nigella's traybake for chicken and sausages with a sort of sage and onion flavour. I use a large pack of chicken thighs. Grab a big plastic bag, and put the following in:

2 onions (white or red) peeled and cut into 8ths,
Juice of 1 lemon, and once squeezed in, cut the squeezed out halves into quarters and chuck that all in too
125ml olive oil
1 tbsp dried sage (you could go rogue here with other dried herbs of your choice, thyme is good, as is oregano for more Italian flavour)
2 tsps English mustard (I often leave this out)
1 tbsp worcestershire sauce

Then add the chicken thighs and squidge about. Leave to marinade in fridge for several hours or up to two days.

To cook: high sided baking tin, preheat oven to 220 (200 fan), let chicken come to room temp and arrange everything from the bag in the baking tray, chicken skin side up. Tuck in 8-12 sausages of your preference (I use lincolnshire if sage and italian ones if I go with oregano, but don't be constrained by my preferences). Bake for an hour to an hour and 15. Check it after an hour.

I tend to eat with salad and bread, but you could bung a jacket potato in at the same time and eat with the easiest veg (peas for me).

Leftovers are good for sandwiches or wraps or salad, or I would think as a sauce for pasta if you shred the chicken a bit and chop up sausages, but that's a bit of a guess I've never done it.


Another cooking thing, but so simple for all the delicious Chinese flavours. I made this yesterday and am reheating for dinner tonight:

Red braised pork (Fuchsia Dunlop)

Packet of pork belly from the supermarket (around 500-700g)
2 inch piece of ginger
2 spring onions
2 tbsp veg oil
500ml chicken stock (cube/gel absolutely fine)
3 tbsps brown sugar (light or dark, I tend to use light)
1 tbsp dark soy sauce
2 tbsp rice wine (or medium-dry sherry)
3/4 tsp salt
1/2 star anise (it says that, I tend to chuck a whole one in)

Cut the belly into 2-3" pieces. In a casserole pan or large saucepan, add the oil, heat and stir fry for a couple of mins. Then add all the other ingredients and let it simmer, partially uncovered and occasionally stirring on the stove for 2 hours, or until sauce is reduced and glossy and sticky.

Pork will be tender, sauce will be super umami.

You can reheat this gently on the hob, so easy to make in advance. I serve it with plain rice (one of those microwave packs would be fine), and steamed greens of whatever kind I have lurking in the fridge. This is very rich, so I like plain things with it and a little goes a long way.

Ok. I will stop now.

read this whilst delivering some medication to a friend, and then went straight to the shop to get some tomatoes and mozzarella !! Had ti trawl back through as phone didn't have signal in the shop so was desperately trying to remember what all the bits to the feta and caprese plates were. Thank you for the inspiration !! (I have also just had a smoothie with frozen spinach, peanut butter, berries etc so thank you to whoever recommended that as that has made my day too ! Off to marinate some tomatoes now xxx

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Veering slightly off topic, my day online, watering plants and drinking coffee is being occasionally interrupted by such inconveniences as work emails.

I've just had one where the title might explain blue tick phenomena - the person concerned is experiencing difficulties with logging in to various things.

RE: Acunt Verification.

How it got through the usually rather over enthusiastic filter on our email server, I have no idea.

 

[Bellybutton lint]

Am genuinely interested as to why she hasn’t shared this petition, if she is genuinely interested in food....I think I probably know the answer to this!

${page~title}

www.campaigns.nfuonline.com

She isn't interested in food though Bacon. Just slinging slop on a plate and writing books about it.

lso adding to this ; sainsbury do their own version of zzap ice lollies (called bubblegum lollies or something. ) look the same, cost £1 for 6, but most

That is dinner sorted then

If I suddenly get told i'm not needed then we'll know 100% she reads here bcos I was the one who told the mayo people about BT and no-one else had so i'll have outed myself and won't get my fleeting moment of fame. Oh well...

Of course she reads here. Mwhahha

shopping trollies galore (and not an OAP in sight).

*Whispers* I have one with ladybirds all over it. It's my ham transporter.

I don’t have a shopping trolley, can I charter a small plane instead?

Oh Fancy!

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Go to the nearest Co-op.

Rose cones

if you wanted to be a bit extra or in the case of Mr Dragon, get laid you could add edible glitter and popping candy on the top.

 

[Nonnymouse]

Long-time lurker, second-time poster: is the crappy bungalow defo in Southend? If she’s getting Oddboxes (avocado salad recipe upthread) then she’d be living in London or the suburbs - or would they be sending them to her so she can write recipes for their blog?

she would have been gifted them to create recipes for them and promote them - probably paid too and handsomely with the size of her network and her brand

 

[Deej]

Still making it all about you Jack?

 

[MarmiteExtract]

Still making it all about you Jack?

Oh my god. That's so embarrassing to read.

(Edit to add — Jack's response, I mean, not the other commenters. She is so missing the mark. It is not about how much money you've lost out on today!)