She'd never try to pass herself off as 90% vegan, what with the squirrels and everything.I know this is WAY OT, but I secretlyTonya.
Jack Monroe #206 I wouldn’t trust her with a spam fritter
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Vlad is on Facebook tonight. Wonder if his Tattle has been playing up too
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"the Italian brand Smeg is best known for what?" was just a question on the chase.
"three fridges, Brad" was unfortunately not the answer
"three fridges, Brad" was unfortunately not the answer
In a bowl sits some peas (possibly still frozen), instant noodles, weetabix shaped mackerel fillets, bamboo shoots, other unidentifiable food stuff, and a raw egg yolk in oily liquid. There are chopsticks placed on top. This is named ramen for breakfast.
That’ll do.
That’ll do.
Have been enjoying the descriptions of the blog posts, great parody! Don't forget the greatest parody of a poor ever...Jack Monroe!
Oh god scrolling through her insta (can you tell how boring my evening has been) and what does she have against breakfast?!?!
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
She is beyond parody! She just makes an arse of herself. Good luck on Insta Jack with your photos of unappetizing food and garrulous prose
Why would you want to start your day with pure sulphur? The farts coming from the crappy bungalow must've been heard halfway down the street. Think all of Mrs J's bike rides must've been wind powered!Oh god scrolling through her insta (can you tell how boring my evening has been) and what does she have against breakfast?!?!
View attachment 765124
View attachment 765125
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
View attachment 765136
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
View attachment 765150
Also, that's how I've seen a lot of Americans on IG do their eggs. For some reason my daughter has incredibly strong feelings about this, and yells at her phone when she sees it
Oh god scrolling through her insta (can you tell how boring my evening has been) and what does she have against breakfast?!?!
View attachment 765124
View attachment 765125
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
View attachment 765136
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
View attachment 765150
Is she using some kind of appalling filter on those or does she actually go and rub her hands in the dirt before she takes the photos?
On a personal note, as someone who can only eat combined eggs (scrambled or omelette) I never appreciate the erroneous/poorly judged full egg!!
Overly heavy eyeliner and Suzanne from Grange Hill hair aside, she looks so much better in the pre-filler days. Honestly the combo of those calculating shark eyes and unnaturally plumped lips is seriously disconcerting.Oh god scrolling through her insta (can you tell how boring my evening has been) and what does she have against breakfast?!?!
View attachment 765124
View attachment 765125
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
View attachment 765136
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
View attachment 765150
Talking of which, wonder how her dealings with IOC are going
The first post is dated May 19. Two months after she moved to the bungalow. She says the school is a two hour round trip.Oh god scrolling through her insta (can you tell how boring my evening has been) and what does she have against breakfast?!?!
View attachment 765124
View attachment 765125
Also she is OBSESSED with eggs - is there a dish she doesn’t throw them into uncooked?! It’s like every other photo is a sad bowl or plate of slop and it’s guaranteed to have an undercooked egg on it.
Though I did chuckle when I came across this. After DKL I think we all know what the secret ingredient is now, don’t we?
View attachment 765136
(This was posted March 2019, couldn’t be arsed to screenshot the ramble - a whole year before DKL).
ETA: Look at this, different cohost but the same expression, lifting a fork.
View attachment 765150
Why would you move to a house an hour, away from your child's school? I could understand if it were central London where housing is a nightmare, but we've already talked about how many available and lovely properties are in Southend.
Unless the crappy bungalow is actually a very nice house in a really nice area and that's why you rented it. (It is)
Oh and it wouldn't really matter how close you were to the school if you aren't the resident parent
#thread title alert 
At last Jack has gone viral
As an actual Victorian urchin, she spends her days up chimnies
I wonder if it's partly because of school dramas that SB ended up being with his dad? She's mentioned him moving schools a few times, and I know there was quite a long gap after she left Allegra and her being able to find him another school place. If dad is settled and near school, it certainly makes more sense for him to be there rather than being dragged about with his mum.
He's been with his father (as resident parent) for a long time. EG said that the school is very close to the Dad's house, which is why he went there. In the case of separated parents and school places, the child is allocated a school on the address of the parent who has main responsibility and receives Child Benefit.
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