Jack Monroe #199 Just mind-bogglingly, gobsmackingly stupid

[EvonyRose]

This IG post is so many missed opportunities, I can't understand how they can not have picked up some marketing skills by now, even just through osmosis.

Yet, summer hols have just kicked off and there are mostly dense, baked goods and a reused salad recipe.

Ice lollies, sorbet, blending with yoghurt to make mini milks, something with meringue, a Mexican fruit salad, all would have been more appealing than turning the oven on for hours...

Could've even thrown a quick pizza together with a cheeky can of pineapple in the background, would have been fab for engagement!

 

[MancBee]

madly off topic but @MancBee who is that in your icon???

It is the chef Marcus Wareing. Earlier this year I was in hospital and the nurse thought I'd signed in under an assumed name because I look like him. I was NHS, but it was a private hospital, so it was a possibility.

I have to admit, that even though I'm a good few years older, in some of his pictures we do look alike. One in particularly made me do a double take as I thought it was me. I think it's the eyes and the forehead. Lockdown hair and grey beard help too.

 

[Captainmouse]

So at the height of summer, when the greengrocers and even the supermarkets are heaving with fresh, seasonal strawberries (which have been particularly great this year), cherries, raspberries, gooseberries, redcurrants and rhubarb, Jack considers this a good time to be shilling tinned fruit? Which is probably more expensive than stuff that actually tastes of fruit?

One or more of the parties in this advertising shitshow have not thought this partnership through properly.

I have been shovelling flat peaches down on a daily basis, @ 75p a pack (not sainsbos over £1+ more!) fresh sweet, why would I even consider a tin

 

[bladiesla]

Cathicn up atm but...

I have to admit I have someting frozen in a glass jar in the freezer and it's working fine (I had nothing else to use at that pint). But you don't hear me going on and on about it either or market it as some maverick sollution.

Next thing you know she'll invent using the breadbag as a sandwich bag.

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

[

Not again. No new content. Does she think people are dim ?

Yes, yes she does.

 

[MooBelle]

View attachment 680031She’s reposted it with all of her DM abominations.

Someone's on the beg for work.
LOOK AT ME WITH MY BEST FRIEND DEL MONTE.
Stop it Jack, I can't take the cringe...

 

[Cookiecookie]

She had pasta for the first time at 14? Dafuq?

What?! I can't bring myself to watch, but why would you lie about pasta? I could understand someone of my grandparents generation not trying it until they were older, but someone born in 1988 - duck off! How about her beloved pastitsio, is she saying she never tried that until she was a teenager too? Such a weird thing to lie about. People were eating pasta in the Mediaeval era, way before the potato came into our lives. It's not a special fancy food at all!

 

[Hollaaa]

What?! I can't bring myself to watch, but why would you lie about pasta? I could understand someone of my grandparents generation not trying it until they were older, but someone born in 1988 - duck off! How about her beloved pastitsio, is she saying she never tried that until she was a teenager too? Such a weird thing to lie about. People were eating pasta in the Mediaeval era, way before the potato came into our lives. It's not a special fancy food at all!

Next it'll be the thrilling discovery of sliced bread.

 

[MancBee]

My freezer is small, I imagine that would be the case for most of her followers, so I need to maximise space. All my leftovers are frozen in old plastic takeaway containers. Once frozen I pop the food out and put it into a plastic bag.

Glass jars would take up so much room. But I don't have a mahoosive Smeg american style side by side fridge freezer like Jack. Jack's fridge freezer is so big it won't fit in her kitchen and she has to locate it in one of her two halls. Each hall almost as big as the living area in my studio flat.

She is living in a massive property, 3-4 bedroom 2 bathroom notabungalow. Many of her target audience are being penalised with a "bedroom tax" because they are living in a two bed flat and due to a change of circumstances now only qualify for a one bed. Others are in temporary accomodation in hostels or hotels. And she thinks she is the one that is hard done by.

 

[SarcasticEllis]

It is the chef Marcus Wareing. Earlier this year I was in hospital and the nurse thought I'd signed in under an assumed name because I look like him. I was NHS, but it was a private hospital, so it was a possibility.

this is gold @MancBee I hope you threw in a couple of cheffy terms here and there to get them gossiping. Or even better, cheffy terms but relating to Fack’s recipes so the staff thought “and he calls himself a chef?!”

 

[Lanie]

What?! I can't bring myself to watch, but why would you lie about pasta? I could understand someone of my grandparents generation not trying it until they were older, but someone born in 1988 - duck off! How about her beloved pastitsio, is she saying she never tried that until she was a teenager too? Such a weird thing to lie about. People were eating pasta in the Mediaeval era, way before the potato came into our lives. It's not a special fancy food at all!

She bound to have had spaghetti , my mum was a very staunch meat and potato cook, but even i had spaghetti.

 

[Veronicaaa]

What?! I can't bring myself to watch, but why would you lie about pasta? I could understand someone of my grandparents generation not trying it until they were older, but someone born in 1988 - duck off! How about her beloved pastitsio, is she saying she never tried that until she was a teenager too? Such a weird thing to lie about. People were eating pasta in the Mediaeval era, way before the potato came into our lives. It's not a special fancy food at all!

I watched it all a while ago and I seem to recall she's on a real narc trip all the way through it, like completely unbearable (even more so than usual). It's also the one that when you skip right to the end, she talks about how she was considering creating a Gofundme in order to buy her 'forever home' but LJC talked her out of it.

 

[bladiesla]

View attachment 680005View attachment 680006

Such writing talent 'convenient, zero hassle and easy to store' surely almost mean the same thing, no? the last line is as gripping as the minutes of our community council meetings ('if you're interested in that kind of thing'. Honestly, how does she call herself a writer?).

 

[Captainmouse]

My freezer is small, I imagine that would be the case for most of her followers, so I need to maximise space. All my leftovers are frozen in old plastic takeaway containers. Once frozen I pop the food out and put it into a plastic bag.

Glass jars would take up so much room. But I don't have a mahoosive Smeg american style side by side fridge freezer like Jack. Jack's fridge freezer is so big it won't fit in her kitchen and she has to locate it in one of her two halls. Each hall almost as big as the living area in my studio flat.

She is living in a massive property, 3-4 bedroom 2 bathroom notabungalow. Many of her target audience are being penalised with a "bedroom tax" because they are living in a two bed flat and due to a change of circumstances now only qualify for a one bed. Others are in temporary accomodation in hostels or hotels. And she thinks she is the one that is hard done by.

Now now, don’t down play her freezer real estate, you and the whole cabal know she doesn’t have just one.

She has all the gifted fish, all the empty takeaway containers, the kilos of mash, etc etc languishing amongst the veg peelings and eyelid sausages and yellow stickered gubbins

 

[MancBee]

She bound to have had spaghetti , my mum was a very staunch meat and potato cook, but even i had spaghetti.

It seems a very oddly specific age too, 14. Not "I was a young teenager" or "I was in high school" but a very definite age. Nobody remembers in that detail when they had something so ordinary as pasta. For LJC's sake, I can hardly remember what I had to eat last week, never mind 20 or so years back.

They always say, if someone is being overly detailed or precise, they are most likely lying. Not pointing any fingers, but if the cap fits and all that.

 

[Orphan_Black]

That Edinburgh video is sooooo cringe!!! 'I'm antiscoical and like to lock myself in my office to pound at the keyboard until I write another bestseller' oh duck off Jack!!! Jack is coming off drunk as a skunk again, the cockiness, the man spreading poses, reading the book out like they're never read it before, and honestly the worse bit? Every little glance to the crowd or compliments Jack receives, you can see it make Jack fizz, they love the accolades, they crave the attention so badly. Jack's parents have so much to bleeping answer for!!!

Also, I'm guessing it would be a busy day appearing as an author at a book festival, but, Jack had no time for an eggy cup brekkie? Height of rudeness to munch and disrupt the interview right off the bat. Ergh Jack is such a twit.

 

[Lanie]

Now now, don’t down play her freezer real estate, you and the whole cabal know she doesn’t have just one.

She has all the gifted fish, all the empty takeaway containers, the kilos of mash, etc etc languishing amongst the veg peelings and eyelid sausages and yellow stickered gubbins

Perhaps if she went down to once fridge and sold some of her sideboards she would be on her way to a deposit for her forever home.

Must cost a fortune to run so many fridges and freezers for one two people.

 

[lilamay]

I watched it all a while ago and I seem to recall she's on a real narc trip all the way through it, like completely unbearable (even more so than usual). It's also the one that when you skip right to the end, she talks about how she was considering creating a Gofundme in order to buy her 'forever home' but LJC talked her out of it.

And she says she's not done bad 'considering she's got like 2 GCSEs'

The lies!!

 

[MancBee]

And she says she's not done bad 'considering she's got like 2 GCSEs'

The lies!!

What happened to the other two and a half? Did she bung 'em in a curry?

 

[Veronicaaa]

And she says she's not done bad 'considering she's got like 2 GCSEs'

The lies!!

Yeah I think with events like these, she completely forgets it's all going to be on the public record, so to speak, and she gets carried away, it's like the audience gives her a complete high so she can't help but play up to them. It's quite revealing as to what she must be like IRL, just so pleased with herself and basking in the attention.