Nice one @PortiaControl embroidered Slopbot is a joy - your hands (on the other hand) are suspiciously clean - nothing a good layer of oil and a liberal slop application couldn't fix 
Jack Monroe #190 The sloppening
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I should set up a Patreon or Tip Jar! But alas, @traumatised sideboard blessed us with slopbot and I wouldn't dream of monetising someone else's intellectual property. Proof that I am not Jack!
I love itFinally, I've made it to the present! Thanks very Jack much Jack for holding off the chaos and giving me a chance to grunk for my life. I actually had about six weeks away from Jack and these threads and I didn't hear mention of her once in my non tattle life. Oh I tell I lie, I logged in to twitter for the first time in ages and one of my friends had retweeted her "hunchy hunch" attention seeking tweet but aside from that nothing. I think it confirms that she really isn't well known at all outside the hellscape that is the twittersphere.
Despite Jack's absence these threads have been such a hoot! I love that Mrs J is now Lord Jesus ComptonI can't decide if the night of Jack inspo quotes or Jack as Bowls was funnier. I laughed so much at both of those! I applaud you for sacrificing your taste buds and attempting some of her recipes. You are braver Frauen/Herren than me!
Also, Fack Monroe.
I've missed being with the cabal in real time so just wanted to share with you a little something I've been working on. It's taken meall weekendthirty minutes with much howling, wailing and clawing but here, I present to you, softly, gently, my lil' slopbot stitch.
View attachment 577811
I realise this is as useful to you all as a drawing of sponsorbot is to an actual recovering alcoholic but nevertheless he was stitched with love and with thanks for the many laughs you've brought me over the last year.
Now duck off!
Edit: Terrible spelling
Amazing!Finally, I've made it to the present! Thanks very Jack much Jack for holding off the chaos and giving me a chance to grunk for my life. I actually had about six weeks away from Jack and these threads and I didn't hear mention of her once in my non tattle life. Oh I tell I lie, I logged in to twitter for the first time in ages and one of my friends had retweeted her "hunchy hunch" attention seeking tweet but aside from that nothing. I think it confirms that she really isn't well known at all outside the hellscape that is the twittersphere.
Despite Jack's absence these threads have been such a hoot! I love that Mrs J is now Lord Jesus Compton
Also, Fack Monroe.
I've missed being with the cabal in real time so just wanted to share with you a little something I've been working on. It's taken meall weekendthirty minutes with much howling, wailing and clawing but here, I present to you, softly, gently, my lil' slopbot stitch.
View attachment 577811
I realise this is as useful to you all as a drawing of sponsorbot is to an actual recovering alcoholic but nevertheless he was stitched with love and with thanks for the many laughs you've brought me over the last year.
Now duck off!
Edit: Terrible spelling
Reset the clock!
Selfie or Palestine hot take next?
Honestly, that drawer is so clean I would consent to having invasive surgery in there. I'm very smol so would definitely fit...Not gonna lie, I did think this! I can assure all you mendacious bullies that the varnish is not masking anything and these nails are as clean as @MancBee 's cutlery drawer
Amazing, and deserving of massive congratulations. I must admit I am a lazy frau and have sort of skim-grunked all the threads from when I was last around. I figured that most of Slackie's behaviour would be the same and from what I have seen... that was a fair and correct assumption. I must ask, however....
- What happened to cousin Eamon, did we get any other visits?
- What happened to that lawsuit that her unruly labia was sitting on?
- Did we ever find out why she was in Edinburgh? How very dare she.
- Who is she currently trying to get to pay her rent?
I'm betting it will be a photo of herself with a keffiyeh under her denim shirt. Then claims that she once spent time in a kibbutz whilst on her gap year. You know, the gap year in her head between Monday and Tuesday.
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So cute! Love lil' bot.Finally, I've made it to the present! Thanks very Jack much Jack for holding off the chaos and giving me a chance to grunk for my life. I actually had about six weeks away from Jack and these threads and I didn't hear mention of her once in my non tattle life. Oh I tell I lie, I logged in to twitter for the first time in ages and one of my friends had retweeted her "hunchy hunch" attention seeking tweet but aside from that nothing. I think it confirms that she really isn't well known at all outside the hellscape that is the twittersphere.
Despite Jack's absence these threads have been such a hoot! I love that Mrs J is now Lord Jesus Compton
Also, Fack Monroe.
I've missed being with the cabal in real time so just wanted to share with you a little something I've been working on. It's taken meall weekendthirty minutes with much howling, wailing and clawing but here, I present to you, softly, gently, my lil' slopbot stitch.
View attachment 577811
I realise this is as useful to you all as a drawing of sponsorbot is to an actual recovering alcoholic but nevertheless he was stitched with love and with thanks for the many laughs you've brought me over the last year.
Now duck off!
Edit: Terrible spelling
Oh I reckon she can manage a 2-in-1.
Who knew that Cameron Diaz did cooking clips on Instagram? I've just discovered this, and yes, they’re better than Jacks.
Snap! I love the odd catch up with people cooking muck and that’s it. It’s been BLISS!I have to say, my productivity has gone through the roof in the past couple of weeks, it's wonderful now that she's not tweeting every stinky brain fart which passes through her empty head! Pray it continues
Keep away Jack
What was big in the news last week?
Love the image of the One True Bot which appeared on the material. Truly it is the cable’s most holy item, we can use it to repel Lardy Xmas dinners which will swivel and explode with lingreenie when they look upon it.
After the last Jewish Jack and Jeremy Mate Love Letter clusterfuck, I think the situation will be given as much distance as we give the Afterbirth Dish..
That’s amazing. We should all order one as a little Cabal badge.Finally, I've made it to the present! Thanks very Jack much Jack for holding off the chaos and giving me a chance to grunk for my life. I actually had about six weeks away from Jack and these threads and I didn't hear mention of her once in my non tattle life. Oh I tell I lie, I logged in to twitter for the first time in ages and one of my friends had retweeted her "hunchy hunch" attention seeking tweet but aside from that nothing. I think it confirms that she really isn't well known at all outside the hellscape that is the twittersphere.
Despite Jack's absence these threads have been such a hoot! I love that Mrs J is now Lord Jesus Compton
Also, Fack Monroe.
I've missed being with the cabal in real time so just wanted to share with you a little something I've been working on. It's taken meall weekendthirty minutes with much howling, wailing and clawing but here, I present to you, softly, gently, my lil' slopbot stitch.
View attachment 577811
I realise this is as useful to you all as a drawing of sponsorbot is to an actual recovering alcoholic but nevertheless he was stitched with love and with thanks for the many laughs you've brought me over the last year.
Now duck off!
Edit: Terrible spelling
@PortiaControl amazing, our very own Shroud of Turin! May you be blessed with bounties of rinsed beans, grated corned beef and anchoïade.
For anyone who recalls the article where Jack claimed she could bench press the Queen and I said that was a bloody great lie: I bench pressed the Queen today and stand by my statement. The Queen told me she hasn't even been to Southend since 1999.
For anyone who recalls the article where Jack claimed she could bench press the Queen and I said that was a bloody great lie: I bench pressed the Queen today and stand by my statement. The Queen told me she hasn't even been to Southend since 1999.
I saw a black glove on the pavement on Saturday. On Sunday it was gone. A coincidence that it was also ascension day? I think not.
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