Jack Monroe #165 She’s in a fugue state

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Veronicaaa

Devastated at the suggestion the Del Monte live is only going to be about 10 minutes long! How on earth is she going to make chicken plus answer all the probing tinned fruit questions in that time, when she could barely complete a potato salad on the Hellmann's live when she had a full hour?
 
Reactions: 61

Into_the_tunnel

Brian Butterfield said:
42 on Sunday . She can get to absolute fuck calling 33 middle-aged.
Plonker.
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I think you mean plonkerbot dearheart.

39 was shit.

40 is turning out to be even more shit.


Last night was going to be a highlight of the decade.

She ruined that.

Like I said. Never forgotten.

Did I mention have a happy birthday Jack?
 
Reactions: 29

Flash123

Happy birthday Jack! I hope u got some sleep, please enjoy your day then take a few hours to prep for 6pm.
 
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crystaleyesd

Tired: If I postpone my 'broadcast' with only a couple of hours notice (for REASONS), I can't be held responsible for the embarrassingly low viewing figures tomorrow.

Wired: If I keep telling people it's my birthday, maybe MORE people will show up to celebrate MEEEEE.

Inspired: If people don't show up to my live, I get to sadfish on twitter all night???

https://giphy.com/DHqth0hVQoIzS
 
Reactions: 57

Munchfrausen



FFS Jack just be grateful for once will you?! Especially when you think of the heartache Sarah Everard’s family are going through right now.
 
Reactions: 66

Veronicaaa

Wonder if she actually went to be last night (gap between tweeting seems to be between 11.29pm and 4.19am) orrrrr if she pulled and all-night pity party. Either way, today's going to be a wild ride.
 
Reactions: 31
B

blurstoftimes

Veronicaaa said:
Wonder if she actually went to be last night (gap between tweeting seems to be between 11.29pm and 4.19am) orrrrr if she pulled and all-night pity party. Either way, today's going to be a wild ride.
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i hope she shares all the wonderful, expensive gifts she's showered with today! Historically Jack has a pretty amazing track record with receiving gifts from her many many friends...
 
Reactions: 53
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Skyfall

Still no sign of her retweeting her birthday tweet- scampering for more affirmation. https://giphy.com/26n6WywJyh39n1pBu
Channelling Samson??
She has no strength to do longer, since the buzz cut 🥸
 
Reactions: 18

kachoochoo

some more sweet, sweet blue tick attention from this morning, mom's was in reply to the SB microwave nonsense



 
Reactions: 38

Vanelope

Oh Nigella

I like to think you want to see the good in people so you threw out some hearts on her birthday because of the pandering.

But encouraging this is not good.
 
Reactions: 45

Lyricallie

I keep forgetting she's only a couple years older than me. Push pops were lush (yet sticky) and the final bit was so sharp and jaggy on the tongue.

Hopefully her wee boy doesn't see her posts about everything being shit. My mum was quite depressed when I was in my early teens but my sister and I never knew until we were much older. However I definitely knew my way round the internet at 11 and that was early 00s so I'm guessing her wee boy would easily find her musings nowadays.
 
Reactions: 29

EllaEm87

She only has to give 9 minutes?! It’s not like it’s live bloody TV. Also the tweet saying about the “contractually obliged 9 minutes” was pure snark and I really wish companies would pull her up on how unprofessional she is.

Also, am 33 and definitely not middle aged. I hope.
 
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Reactions: 50

Funsizes

Sunday School Teacher Jack must be beside herself, its her Jesus year!
 
Reactions: 36

colouredlines

MarthaFarkus said:
Anybody else got ‘Unhappy Birthday’ by The Smiths as an ear worm this morning...?
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YES. Hahahaha. I was also thinking of 'Happy Birthday to Me' by Bright Eyes, which has the most Jack Monroe lyrics ever, rhyming THIS WASTED YEAR with DEVOTED FRIENDS DISAPPEAR. It was a bit too emo for me even when I was a teenage emo!

Something more cheerful for you, Jack. It even features trains, site of a thousand chaoses.

 
Reactions: 42

Cookiecookie

Vanelope said:
I like a chip butty. I like roast potatoes. I like a French dip sarnie (was that an attempt)? How did she take three wonderful ideas and make it so sad?
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Genius. Sheer maverick genius.

She really does have talent towards turning edible things into non edible things. I'll give her that one cos it's her birthday
 
Reactions: 21

crystaleyesd

colouredlines said:
YES. Hahahaha. I was also thinking of 'Happy Birthday to Me' by Bright Eyes, which has the most Jack Monroe lyrics ever, rhyming THIS WASTED YEAR with DEVOTED FRIENDS DISAPPEAR. It was a bit too emo for me even when I was a teenage emo!
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Lmaooooo on my 15th birthday I took a black and white selfie (on a camera, there were no smart phones back then) of me looking miserable in a party hat and posted it to my Deviantart with the lyrics to that song - I think I hit peak emo that day, there was no topping it.

(In my defence, Conor Oberst and I share the same birthday )
 
Reactions: 58
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