Jack Monroe #154 The book has furloughed itself

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[I’MBUSY!]

Sorry I wasn’t having a go, you were obviously coming from a good place, worrying about her well being. But never having heard of her till I found tattle I can honestly say even now I find it hard to believe she is a real person. I am unable to find one single redeeming feature In her. All her traits are negative, I am not prone to violence, I don’t even swear, but I would seriously be tempted to slap her, she is a fraud, a liar, a cheat, she is cruel, unkind and extremely selfish. I cannot believe she gets any work at all, none of it is earned or deserved and she is depriving other more worthy candidates.
(climbs down off soapbox)

I absolutely know you weren't having a go

She's all the things you describe. And I really wish she'd find a path to not being so.

And honestly? All of you? You lift me up, you funny, moral, clever little fuckers messy witches.

 

[Suffolkmum]

The first thing she should do is sit the duck down, if possible. On DKL all the other people on video links were sat down, whereas Jack was standing around. It’s very difficult to not fidget while standing for long periods because legs need movement for circulation. She could then also fidget with her legs under the table and no one could see her.

It’s exasperating how she seems to think she doesn’t need to improve and her general incompetence is just a cute part of who she is.



I’m sorry you’re suffering too. Nature hasn’t been kind to us women

I can’t help but think that the likes of Jack and Jameela are jinxing themselves with these illness fantasies. They’re inviting karma to come and bite them on the arse.



Didn’t Liz Jones have to admit in court that her newspaper columns were exaggerated or something?

I always got the impression that she’s wants to be - or to portray herself as - this fabulous, frivolous shallow woman who cares about nothing but fashion, and being tit with money while buying all the luxuries is part of that persona. At least she’s not begging I guess?

What annoys me about LJ is she seems to exaggerate her anorexia and her hearing difficulties. In particular she uses her alleged anorexia to enhance her shallow, troubled fashionista character. She has made money off of it by contributing to eating disorder documentaries.

She uses her fake veganism to add to her anorexic image, and also to make herself look deliberately annoying. It is so harmful to the cause and to real vegans.

THAT WAS ME!!! I’M SO HAPPY YOUVE GOT THAT SCREENSHOT

I forgotten why she blocked me on Insta. So happy

For sure a certain amount of house training would be required!

I mean, you’re obviously right. I just think that MAYBE being held accountable on a daily basis would make her calm the duck down.

But she’s probably far too gone.

Absolutely, I worked with a Jack clone. Every bloody day was a drama. The list of things she couldn’t do due to her never ending list of ailments. The supposed slights and what she considered inappropriate remarks. The amount of times she accused male colleagues of sexism, yet she could make any amount of unpleasant comments. Like Jack and Grenfell, she told anyone who would listen that she helped coordinate the response to the 2005 London bombings, she didn’t. That’s what triggers me most about Jack. By the by the local authority we worked for paid her off in the end.

 

[Mr Krabs]

The last couple of times she had office-based jobs they were a disaster. Fire service ended with her getting the union involved. She got a plum job at the Southend Echo and left after five minutes...

Any job that would hire her would be totally beneath her nowadays. And probably not earn enough to pay her RENT.

 

[Cunderthunt]

Yes. She must know that she isn’t good at this. It’s hard for anyone to realise that something we wanted doesn’t actually suit us. But...you know, grow up?

I genuinely think that an office based job would be much better for her, as it seems clear that the lonesome nature of being self employed does her absolutely no good at all, and just allows her to disappear ever further up her own fundament.

She needs more human contact. People to take the piss out of her when she’s being a knob, people to support her, people to talk to and with. Maybe with one of the charities she supports (though I appreciate that would not allow her to rake in the cash as she does now)?

And doing something productive that doesn’t expose her lack of warmth/humour/relatability - which I think are requirements in her current line of work - quite so harshly.

I think she’d blossom.

She would be a nightmare! Endless complaints about bullying, making up lies about her higher-ups to make herself look like a victim; attention seeking, laziness, napping, compulsive lying, unreliable, never doing any work, accusations of isms and phobias to deflect from her incompetence, demands for reasonable accommodations for pretend ailments; dramatic accidents; calling in sick etc etc.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

I've just been looking at Ruby Tandoh's twitter feed and it's amazing to note the difference between her and Jack. She shares articles, congratulates other people, suggests charities to donate to, and she did a poll about what people want to see in a cookbook. She signed off that poll saying she was recipe testing, so I assume she's got something out in the near-ish future. But the contrast couldn't be more glaring.

I wonder why Ruby doesn’t get more TV work...?! I’ve only heard gr8 things about her book (although not read it myself), she was in a very popular baking show, and she clearly actually has a clue?!

I don’t agree with the poster who said high up people protect her cos her media career is pretty budget tbh, but I do think she’s got an amazing PR/agent? Hence the recent flood of the povertyTM articles and small tv appearances...

 

[Satisfying Click]

Workplace Jack would be one of the worst incarnations. Any reasonable feedback would immediately be called bullying, for which she'd go off sick for stress. Appraisals would be preceded by a chaos or injury. She'd tell one of her awful dad-banter-jokes and likely upset someone, but howl about diversity and inclusion if someone raised her inappropriate behaviour. They'd have to block Twitter on her IT account.

That said, we love you, @I'MBUSY! You can climb out of the pit if you've managed to coax Precious with a Linda McCartney sausage

 

[Captainmouse]

I wonder why Ruby doesn’t get more TV work...?! I’ve only heard gr8 things about her book (although not read it myself), she was in a very popular baking show, and she clearly actually has a clue?!

I don’t agree with the poster who said high up people protect her cos her media career is pretty budget tbh, but I do think she’s got an amazing PR/agent? Hence the recent flood of the povertyTM articles and small tv appearances...

Ruby was very rude on twitter to Matt of the forearms, and I believe that wasn’t a first, though I don’t follow her.

 

[Cunderthunt]

I absolutely know you weren't having a go

She's all the things you describe. And I really wish she'd find a path to not being so.

And honestly? All of you? You lift me up, you funny, moral, clever little fuckers.

I do know what you mean, I wish she'd do something productive with her life and stop grifting. Sometimes I wonder what normal jobs she could do, but I really don't think she has the commitment or work ethic for anything.

I have a cousin who grew up rich and spoiled. She is very rarely employed, and then when she is, she's so self-absorbed and lazy she gets sacked or is politely forced out. She sees herself as being "above" worrying about silly, petty little things like money and jobs, because she'd too deep. She mostly leeches off of others, and is very good at getting herself into wealthy circles where her lifestyle is automatically funded by default. Oh and she has a motivational speaker byline/blog thing.

She reminds me a lot of Jack. Jack didn't grow up as rich as my cousin, but I certainly think that she was spoiled to some extent. Including spoiling her personality by gassing her up about how gifted she supposedly is.

 

[Billybellend]

Someone should compile a list of her vegan-bashing quotes, maybe as a fun gif. Could be deployed every time someone recommends her body of work to new vegans.

This is one of the things that truly, truly pisses me off about her. I've said it before, I'll say it again, I'm happy every single time a cook promotes vegan recipes, regardless of whether they are vegan or not. But vegan bashing is bleeping tedious and she's no different to Gordon Ramsey in that regard, apart from that she's still making money off the vegan pound. Ergo, she's worse than Gordon Ramsey.

Yes, I completely agree. I know loads of vegetarians and vegans, none of whom are dogmatic or offensive in the slightest. Why must she always grab onto a stereotype?

 

[Lumpyspaceprincess]

I don’t think she even enjoys the TV appearances, so I don’t get why she keeps doing them. She could have a perfectly nice living from her books really, we know they’re tit but a lot of books are tit and sell well if they’ve got a “name” behind them, and she’s obviously got a fairly devoted squiggle fan base.

She could take so much pressure off herself if only she accepted she can’t be, and more importantly doesn’t need to be the best at everything. But she’s such a narc she’s incapable of doing that. She brings all her chaoses, stresses and deadline day panics on herself.

I assume they pay well. Being good on TV = good book sales too (which she isn’t)).

 

[LavaFlake]

I wonder why Ruby doesn’t get more TV work...?! I’ve only heard gr8 things about her book (although not read it myself), she was in a very popular baking show, and she clearly actually has a clue?!

I don’t agree with the poster who said high up people protect her cos her media career is pretty budget tbh, but I do think she’s got an amazing PR/agent? Hence the recent flood of the povertyTM articles and small tv appearances...

Ruby has been very open about the number of high up feathers she's ruffled by being outspoken. She's not bitter about it or makes excuses though, you can tell her activism is real because she just sees it as a neccessary consequence. I can't think of specific examples aside from writing an article about the dangers of wellness and orthorexia (and gunning for Deliciously Ella and the Hemsley sisters as a result - deserved imho) but she definitely has always been outspoken about the food press and tv chefs.

Ruby also worked in a kitchen for a while because she spoke about being furloughed at the start of the pandemic so to me she seems to focus her energy a lot more on activism and projects she's passionate about than just PR. Unlike someone...

I love Ruby. She puts her money where her mouth is when it comes to activism, and promotes and is involved with so much grassroots stuff. I was so pleased when I learnt she'd unfollowed Jack after advocating for her for so long! Plus her writing is fab and recipes also very good!

 

[MancBee]

She has retweeted this blog who is ‘inspired’ by her

A skint disabled queer’s guide to eating

Okay, so let’s make this clear first: I am no Bootstrap Cook. Jack is a huge inspiration to me but I am not a chef. I am not a nutritionist. I do not have any kind of expertise on food or hea…

weegingerspoonie.home.blog

which then has the lines “And I’m shite at maths so I’ll give you the real price of buying it, not the breakdown of each portion to make it seem cheaper (looking at you, Tory twitter).”

Not going to do the exact thing Jack does which is break it down by the penny but is inspired by her and blaming Tory Twitter all in one go. No sense!

What has the fact they are queer got to do with anything? They are blogging about food, nothing to do with gender, so I'm at a bit of a loss.

I can sort of go along with mentioning being disabled, as that could affect the access to food supply, but as their store of choice is Tesco, I'm not sure that is relevant either. Disability is only briefly mentioned in the blog three times, twice to say they are multiple disabled, and one to say they have spoken to other disabled people.

I am a gay man, I'm multiple disabled and I have chronic ailments, but I don't mention these things unless they are relevant and have an impact on what I'm talking about. I hate the way that people define themselves by their ailments gender, or sexuality.

I don't start every conversation with "I am a gay man, disabled and chronically ill". I don't introduce myself as that either. If it is relevant I will tell you during the course of the conversation.

These people signpost these things and use them to stop any criticism of them, as people become wary of being accused of an "ism".

 

[Billybellend]

You may recall a few threads ago after someone re-posted the Jackapella 'Landslide' video that I said I could make an entire song using solely sounds from it if I wanted to give us all nightmares. Well, a seed was sown and I found myself in need of a distraction project this week so I did it. I would call it an arrangement rather than a remix as I've put the words in a more appropriate order for our Slop Princess. Unfortunately we can't get the full effect because the bloody pillock got the lyrics wrong and didn't realise that the final verse isn't the same, it's a variation on the first which would have contained some essential words that I needed.




Please only listen if you're feeling masochistic. It's definitely an improvement on Jack warbling in a hotel bathroom but even Slopbot can't turn her into Stevie Nicks.

Pure, unadulterated genius. Chef’s kiss!!

 

[StringyMango]

Apologies all but have just caught up with Landslide. Couldn't listen just before trying to sleep.
@traumatised sideboard just brilliantly nightmarish. Like coming round from a bad anaesthetic.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Well they did say they are inspired by Jack, I guess that means they think they have to put all the labels in the bio!
Fair enough they are blogging about being a spoonie on a budget which, as one myself, is a niche that doesn’t have enough attention IMHO.
Right now I want 6 golden delicious, a loaf of brown kingsmill, a carrot, low fat hummus, and one other thing I forgot. Oh yeah, about 1-1.5kg of Maris pipers. I have no way of getting these. I can get them next week if I go to the shop. I can get other items smilie are to them (full fat hummus, own brand bread, Braeburn apples, a bag of carrots, 2.5kg potatoes) at a cost of £10 via deliveroo or Pinga.
To be honestI’m just going to do without. I’ll have dried fruit, make some hummus with frozen garlic, eat dried fruit instead of apples and crave a baked potato all week.

 

[Saint_clemmie]

She never has before (despite what she professes.) I think we can safely say, she didn't this time either.

Shockingly DKL do rehearsals and it was still car crash tv!

 

[Flash123]

What has the fact they are queer got to do with anything? They are blogging about food, nothing to do with gender, so I'm at a bit of a loss.

I can sort of go along with mentioning being disabled, as that could affect the access to food supply, but as their store of choice is Tesco, I'm not sure that is relevant either. Disability is only briefly mentioned in the blog three times, twice to say they are multiple disabled, and one to say they have spoken to other disabled people.

I am a gay man, I'm multiple disabled and I have chronic ailments, but I don't mention these things unless they are relevant and have an impact on what I'm talking about. I hate the way that people define themselves by their ailments gender, or sexuality.

I don't start every conversation with "I am a gay man, disabled and chronically ill". I don't introduce myself as that either. If it is relevant I will tell you during the course of the conversation.

These people signpost these things and use them to stop any criticism of them, as people become wary of being accused of an "ism".

I get the disabled thing sort of..... think this person calls them self a ‘spoonie’ which I had to google as initially I thought it was a term of abuse but something to do with not having energy to lift spoon due to illness which is where their shop has come from. Jack must have inspired them to make all of their protected characteristics front and centre of every conversation

ETA: @HotesTilaire explained this much better already

 

[kachoochoo]

Hi there spoonie blogger! i can see you've found these threads! we're not "melts" thanks. and it's entirely up to you what you put in your blogposts

maybe have a little read to see what we see about your pal jack

also, on your blog where you say this, " And I’m shite at maths so I’ll give you the real price of buying it, not the breakdown of each portion to make it seem cheaper (looking at you, Tory twitter). " you do realise that's exactly what jack does?

 

[Flash123]

Hi there spoonie blogger! i can see you've found these threads! we're not "melts" thanks. and it's entirely up to you what you put in your blogposts

maybe have a little read to see what we see about your pal jack

perhaps they also want to explain how they are inspired by Jack’s recipe coatings while also criticising that type of costing being from ‘Tory Twitter’