Jack Monroe #121 Fahrenheit 106

[HarderFaster]

Aren’t most of the BBC Good Food recipes developed by their team of home economists? Probably the same team of home economists (or at least their colleagues) who would be testing her crappy chicken dinner recipes for The Fascist Express, prepping her ingredients ahead of her TV appearances, and sorting out her “here’s one I made earlier” to make her inedible slop look as presentable as possible?

My initial thought was that she’s mad but I now realise that it’s sheer arrogance: in her mind she’s better than any home economist, multi-Michelin-starred chef, food stylist or photographer. Only her recipes, or those of blue tickers who engage with her, or her Dad’s shite packet mix trifle are worth anything. duck anyone else’s ideas, time, or hard work.

Good luck with those Del Monte TV promo gigs in 2021, Jack...

 

[NomDeGuerre]

If I have time later on, I might identify all the trifles she's screenshotted and find out who came up with the recipes. It would be good to see which cooks she's decided to slag off.

I just searched 'trifle' on Google Images, and a lot of the pics have been lifted from the first page (never knowingly overworked).

I've started to put names to trifles (what has become of me), but I'm away to buy some Kahlua so will have to report back later.

 

[crystaleyesd]

Behold, Jack's dad's trifle:

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Jack's dad's nails are as bad as hers - maybe the secret trifle ingredient is grime?

 

[Falkor]

Interesting that this miraculous recovery comes the day after it was mooted on here that she'd simply been copying all Louisa's Covid symptoms...

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

Jack's dad's nails are as bad as hers - maybe the secret trifle ingredient is grime?

I was just about to say the same! Dirty nails obviously run in the family!

 

[Satisfying Click]

Oh good, Jack's proper trifle

Bottom layer - bathroom sponges soaked in Del Monte pineapple juice
Fruit layer - no energy to open a Del Monte can cause of the 'Rona, so peach slices fished out of a curry
Custard layer - Birds powder and instant mash
Topping - tears and recrimination over not being invited onto Saturday Kitchen

 

[kachoochoo]

all of these look lovely. can't wait to see her PROPER trifle

 

[Silver Linings]

So. It’s Christmas Eve. Some crazy percentage of the UK is under lockdown, Brexit, the ports, people are miserable. She’s famously sickly and was scared of covid despite scampering all over the country but finally got it, and according to her she was really poorly. So how does she act when she’s feeling better? Slags people off, laughs at her own jokes, ‘shops her selfies and is pedantic with strangers on the internet.

Happy Christmas, Jack. You’re a cow.

 

[Carmina-Piranha]

Jack slagging off other peoples' recipes lol

Funny way to go about it if she wants to work with the BBC, manky cow.

 

[Lemonsweets91]

Oh good, Jack's proper trifle

Bottom layer - bathroom sponges soaked in Del Monte pineapple juice
Fruit layer - no energy to open a Del Monte can cause of the 'Rona, so peach slices fished out of a curry
Custard layer - Birds powder and instant mash
Topping - tears and recrimination over not being invited onto Saturday Kitchen

This is both genius and disgusting. Brava.

 

[LeftToMyOwnDevices]

JMs recovery truly is a Christmas miracle.

Hallelujah!

 

[Walkdengirl]

I've never liked trifle because of it's lack of texture. Jack's probably outraged as these recipes contain a crunch element and she only makes slop

It's definitely not a sacred dish in the UK because a trifle is quite dated...

I love trifle, but mine has no jelly in it, lots of cake, fruit, booze. A good layer of custard and lots of whipped double cream

It's not considered dated where I live.

 

[Tabitha D]

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Never mind trifle, Jack - if we ever want to flummox you in a debate, we’ll just mention your grandad.

 

[Whaa?]

And yet she suggested putting granola on a trifle!

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But that was then (8 months ago)

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[ReginaPhalangee]

I love trifle, but mine has no jelly in it, lots of cake, fruit, booze. A good layer of custard and lots of whipped double cream

It's not considered dated where I live.

that sounds lovely! My mum made a really nice baileys trifle a couple of years back, also with no jelly

 

[Veronicaaa]

She's getting narky already . Merry Christmas Jack!

 

[Lemonsweets91]

I love trifle, but mine has no jelly in it, lots of cake, fruit, booze. A good layer of custard and lots of whipped double cream

It's not considered dated where I live.

I've always considered it an old fashioned pud. "Dated" might have been a bit harsh because I know everyone still has it and it's always being revamped, but it's definitely not just a "classic trifle" anymore which is what Jack wants because people don't still live in the 80s.

 

[crystaleyesd]

Interesting that this miraculous recovery comes the day after it was mooted on here that she'd simply been copying all Louisa's Covid symptoms...

I also reckon she couldn't bear the thought of missing out on Christmas tweeting. I'm sure there'll be everything - sadfishing about how difficult it is for her this year, humblebragging that she whipped up the bestest christmas meal EVER despite the rona, multiple retweets of her horrible lard menu, smol ickle pixie selfies in her christmas jammies (John Lewis), some sort of convoluted, not-quite-illegal-but-taking-the-piss bubble arrangement with her family, and many MANY tedious opinions on the 'correct' Christmas foods. Joy to the bleeping world

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Those hashtags! She can't even tag her own father without making him just a planet in her orbit:. "Papajack". Eeedeuuuurrrrggghh