Jack Monroe #117 Exit through the grift slop

[TriviaNewtonJohn]

It's pantomime season! Yay! I'm working on my script for a show based on JM's life, along the lines of the radio play (RIP June), and the.film offer.

Provisionally titled "Jack and the Beanslop", I'm hoping for Joe Pasquale for the starring role.

Supporting roles include the scarf, brambly mice, Cooper cat.

I've approached the Cotswold Company re providing the set. No reply as yet

This sounds amazing. There needs to be a big wallpaper backdrop that gets coloured in as the plot develops.

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

This picture stuff is what is so infuriating. She will use us doing this compare and contrast as evidence of bullying. When in fact it is entirely of her own making.

If she just posted pictures of herself completely undoctored that looked like the ones that appeared in the media then we would have no fuel. As it is, she posts triggering, FaceTuned, unrealistic images that look nothing like her. For many of us here, this is harmful, for others it enrages, but for all it isjust evidence of the lies that we need documenting.

Like with so many facets of what we are discussing, if the lies stopped, we would.

The thing that gets me is without the filters she's genuinely a very attractive woman in my opinion. She has no need to doctor her photos - but when she does she feeds into the whole influencer 'must have perfect features' vibe. I think people's not quite perfect features make them who they are, and makes them unique, I always think people who have something a bit different about their looks are so much more attractive than those who try to conform to what society thinks is the ideal. I wish she would embrace her natural looks, as she is very pretty imo rather than photoshopping herself to look like a 12 year old boy.

 

[PoorPatrol]

“Like with so many facets of what we are discussing, if the lies stopped, we would.”

True, when she stops doing a chaos, we basically start imploding and making our own. It all goes a bit Lord of the Flies when she’s quiet. Best advice for you, Jack - stop grifting, and we’ll all go a bit weird and the thread will spontaneously combust!

 

[MancBee]

I see the Lady Doctor has been prescribing red lipstick again. Look at that ouchy mouth.

 

[TurnedUpInTipp]

I’m catching up, but wonder if we know yet what specifically she’s “gifted” at?

Given that none of the ex GF's has spilled..
I'm going to guess at licking her own eyebrows down and circular breathing like a trumpet player.

 

[GoLando]

Thread title: Young, gifted, and Jack

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

The thing that gets me is without the filters she's genuinely a very attractive woman in my opinion. She has no need to doctor her photos - but when she does she feeds into the whole influencer 'must have perfect features' vibe. I think people's not quite perfect features make them who they are, and make them unique, I always think people who have something a bit different about their looks are so much more attractive than those who try to conform to what society thinks is the ideal. I wish she would embrace her natural looks, as she is very pretty imo rather than photoshopping herself to look like a 12 year old boy.

I wanted to add this but forgot because I was still thinking about Alan’s sloth dinner lady.

 

[HotesTilaire]

True, when she stops doing a chaos, we basically start imploding and making our own. It all goes a bit Lord of the Flies when she’s quiet. Best advice for you, Jack - stop grifting, and we’ll all go a bit weird and the thread will spontaneously combust!

It would just turn into the food and drink threads. Alan would probably start making other celebs into Alans

 

[MancBee]

Thread title: Young, gifted, and Jack

Or more truthfully ........ Not so young, grifted and Jack.

 

[ScamSandwich]

Dunno about anyone else but, when I cook, I plate up what I hope my kids will eat. If it doesn’t get eaten, I scrape it onto my own plate or bowl and stick on the side to eat for lunch the next day. Nothing gets wasted

That's how I do it. I eat everything up as it is, with small variations, of course, but never anything maverick or blended/blitzed slop. I really never have any food waste.

Christmas dinner will be cooked for a friend and me this year. We have both been on an incredible tight budget this year, and not because we chose to live frugally. Because it is Christmas we will have very reasonably priced organic chicken (2 legs), roasted on potatoes, 1 sweet potato, parsnip and one red onion, prepared with garlic, fresh rosemary and vegetable oil. Nigella's pear and chocolate pudding to finish.

 

[GoLando]

That's how I do it. No maverick ideas, I eat everything up as it is, with small variations, of course, but never anything maverick or blended/blitzed slop. I really never have any food waste.

Christmas dinner will be cooked for a friend and me this year. We have both been on an incredible tight budget this year, and not because we chose to live frugal. Because it is Christmas we will have very reasonably priced organic chicken (2 legs), roasted on potatoes, 1 sweet potato, parsnip and one red onion, prepared with garlic, fresh rosemary and vegetable oil. Nigella's pear and chocolate pudding to finish.

3 minutes in the microwave and most things remain edible. I don’t even put things in the fridge because it tends to be cool enough in the kitchen. It’s such low effort frugality which is the only reason I manage it!

 

[Cookiecookie]

Or the stains you get when you smoke.

She was carting a vape around at one point. Wonder if she's back on the cigs?

 

[Alansbigplate]

She’s really captured the spirit of a bootstrap Christmas in that Express spread

 

[Walkdengirl]

I'm watching mom on catch up.

Nigella wouldn't allow her guests 2 burnt pigs in blankets per person.

 

[Scarletfever]

View attachment 344081

Famous first words: how celebrities made their way on to children's bookshelves

David Walliams, Whoopi Goldberg, Bruce Springsteen … when celebrity authors make big money from children’s books, do young readers and other writers pay the price?

www.theguardian.com

We're not the only ones keeping JM receipts. Those David W tweets they reference are long gone

 

[Blurp]

Look! Jack’s going head to head with Mom!

And Mom got more page space.

Nigella for the nobs; Jack for the barrel scrapings.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Missmopps]

thank you so much for posting this! But oh my goodness I got to where she slagged off her colleagues for making wise choices or “shacking up” as she called it and I couldn’t take any more. She is such a bleep and it’s cringey how much she bigs herself up when in actual fact she’s done duck all to benefit anyone else and has no idea what she’s talking about.

She says in this article she taught herself to cook from Mom’s book “Kitchen” which indeed came out in 2010, but she also said previously she taught herself from reading the labels of Lloyd Grossman’s sauce jars and working backwards from the ingredients.

 

[Incywincy]

Ooohhh look, I'm in the current thread and can QUOTE!!

What is this gif from please looks familiar but cannot place it!

Sort of want to crop her face and change my pic to this

 

[Cookiecookie]

She’s totally removed her bottom row of teeth from the fake photo, clearly doesn’t like them much

She definitely hates her teeth (fair does, a lot of people aren't keen on theirs) However, instead of spunking her money on 50 sideboards, she'd have been better off investing in some decent dental work. Lip fillers draw attention to them as well.