Spenny and imos first date- Imos got a hot date tonight. It's her first date in a long time so shes gone all out. Shes washed her hair , put on fresh tan , shaved and put on fresh knickers, coz you know ya gal might get lucky. Her lady parts have cobwebs it's been that long. Dirty dee and salad is on hand to give her some parental advice. When choosing an outfit dirty dee instructs her to "wear something that shows a just a little cleavage, you don't want to come across as to keen, just make sure your dress is short enough that if you bend over he can see your bacon barm". Salad reminisces over their first date " there was plenty of bacon barm on show that night eh dee? In fact I got the full English breakfast ". "Oh you are to much dad , mum loves it" says imo . Shes feeling nervous but Ben reassures her she will be fine " it's like riding a bike you never forget , take it from a man with experience. I've ridden that many bikes they call me ben "tour de France " salad". Imo has arranged to meet her lucky suitor at a cocktail bar. She arrives and sees him sitting at a table. Hes got floppy dark hair , what looks like freezer burn around his nostrils and he looks like hes not the brightest bulb in the chandelier. Perfect for imo. Hes a little bit to muscular for imos liking but not to worry , a little bit of manipulation can fix that. She walks over "omg hello angel my names imogen and if your new here thank you for joining me , don't forget to hit that subscribe button...oh I'm so sorry I'm such a rubbish date , I have a YouTube channel you see and that's how I talk to my huns on there , they're my best friends you see" " oh wow well obviously that's impressive, my name is Spencer horton". Spenny has a half pint of beer in front of him. Imo picks it up and fucks it against the wall. "There that's better". She beckons the bar tender to bring down two pineapple juices "no alcohol here huns". Spenny like this boss attitude, hes impressed. Imo proceeds to tell him that shes got a stomach condition and cant have dairy , wheat or gluten. She goes into a 40 minute monologue about this and when she finishes says "but I dont like to go about it , no attention seeking here hun". Spenny then tells her hes a barber "so obviously I know alot about hair". " yeah great " says imo " shall I tell you about the time I was bullied, oh where to start". She tells him of all the nasty bullies shes encountered in her life and then spenny goes to the toilet . Imo has a look around the bar , EVERYONE is staring at her but that's nothing new , she wishes people would just be kinder. She spots a man sitting at a table reading the sun newspaper and appears to be wearing a fake moustache and those glasses you wear to watch 3d at the cinema. Would you Adam and eve it, its only a poorly disguised bensalad! "What are you doing here dad?" Says imo through tears of laughter. "Well I came for a look at my son in law to be , your mother is here too" he points to another table but its empty. "Well she was there". Ben is confused. Suddenly dee emerges from the disabled toilet wearing a pink (now lopsided) wig. Theres is a young man with her he doesnt speak English and looks to have just seen things he wishes he hadn't. "Oi oi mum loves it " imo is so happy her parents have surprised her like this and cries. Spenny comes back from the toilet , he panics coz he realises he spent a naughty weekend with a drunken dirty dee a few years ago. Hes shocked to learn its imos mum. "Oh I remember you" says dee "mills you'll never guess I've only had a go on your date before ". Imo doesn't mind , her and her mum share everything after all. They all have a drink and a laugh. Spenny gets a text on his phone it's a picture of a teenage boy with his middle finger in his mouth. It says "be good to my sis or this bad man is gonna duck you up , know what I'm saying bruv". Spenny is scared but imo tells him it's ok that hes just a little baby. Spenny suggests to imo they go back to his place " oh sounds great , we'll get our coats come on dee " says ben. Its not what spenny had in mind but he knows imo is the one so he is happy to get to know the in laws. On the walk back to his house ben gives him some sex tips " make sure you do foreplay , my mills loves that or so I'm told" " well I like doggy myself ben " spenny tells him. Spenny then gets down on all fours and starts panting and growling. The hudsons know that imo has found the one. They go back to spennys , imo and spenny have a little alone time while dee and ben take turns peeping throw the keyhole with both of them occasionally shouting words of encouragement. Approximately 2 minutes and 7 seconds later they emerge from the bedrooms. Any remaining cobwebs have well and truly gone! Spenny is crying he tells imo he loves her and they all share a treat size bag of twix. Imo is so happy and they continue on to go on several dates many of which end in spenny inserting a suppository into her bottom. Spenny loves it!
doesn’t seem too arsed considering she’s been caught out a good amount of times
I’d like to thank Imo and Spenny for her bullshit and lies, I’d invite her in for a celebratory twix and bowl of Oatibix but I wouldn’t want to upset the poor tum tum xxx
