I was with my ex for 7 years from the age of 20. House, car, holidays, the whole thing. Thought we'd get married and have kids. Was really happy, rarely argued. Seemed a little off for a few weeks but blamed it on being busy at work which made sense for time of the year and industry he worked, but then he seemed himself again. Then one day out of the blue he just told me he was done. He didn't think our relationship was going anywhere and he didn't want to be with me anymore although he loved me. He had spoken about us starting a family and how it would work alongside our careers etc literally a few days before. Told me he was really excited to start a family.
So obviously I was completely blindsided. Heartbroken. Couldn't make sense of it all. No one saw it coming, his family and friends could not believe it. In fact I was the one that had to tell people because weeks had gone by and he hadn't told anyone. I thought he might have been having a breakdown, searched for any excuse as to why. Though in a couple of weeks he'd change his mind.
But no, he completely cut me off. Gave me 3 days to pack my things and leave, blocked my number, social media. I thought I'd done something for him to be so cold. I packed and I left, obviously there were a few lingering bits that needed to be sorted for a few weeks after.
About a month later I realised I'd left my passport in his cabinet so I organised through his parents to pop and get it and they let me in. There on top of his cabinet was a valentine's day card from his work colleague. The message in it, because obviously I looked, suggested something had been going on for a while. So that gave me some closure. He bare faced looked me in the eye and told me there was no one else. Liar.
So I think in hindsight, he met her at work, decided he wanted to jump ship, kept me strung along until he knew for certain it was a sure thing with her and then dropped me like the last 7 years meant duck all. I've never seen or spoken to him since but through mutual friends I've heard he moved her in a few weeks after I left, became step-dad to her daughter, got engaged and had a kid together within the year. Still together as far as I know. So to say that left me with trust issues is an understatement. For a long I tried to understand why or how he could just drop me like that or why I wasn't good enough. They are answers you'll never know.
Fast forward several years and now I've been with my current partner 5 years and we're getting married in a couple of years. Life goes on. You move through it and you find happiness. I never thought I would at the time. I thought I'd never get over it. Granted its left me unable to trust anyone completely and I'm always waiting for it to happen again. The only thing I miss is having the money. He was incredibly successful and were very financially comfortable. But at least now everything I have is mine.
Funnily enough I've seen the same scenario play out with many people and there is ALWAYS someone else. Call it sexist, but i truly believe men do not leave long term relationships unless they have someone else ready to go. I'm yet to be proved wrong although there will be exceptions.